Davida Hartman - Beating Anxiety: What Young People on the Autism Spectrum Need to Know

BEATING ANXIETY

What Young People on the
Autism Spectrum Need to Know

Davida Hartman

Illustrated by Kate Brangan

Jessica Kingsley Publishers
London and Philadelphia

For Alex

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

If you are reading this book, you probably have something called autism or Asperger syndrome. Or, as I will call it from now on, you are on the autism spectrum . There are lots of great things about being on the autism spectrum, many of which you will read about in this book.

You probably also deal with something called anxiety . Anxiety is one of the not so great things about being on the autism spectrum.

Anxiety is when you are feeling really worried or afraid of something that you think might happen in the future.

Anxiety affects people differently. It might make you:

Worry all day about lots of different things

Be intensely afraid of just one or two things

Feel anxious when you are around other people

Find it even harder than normal to deal with sensory information (sounds, sights, noises, tastes, touch and smells)

Get things called panic attacks (when you get so overwhelmed by anxiety that you feel as if you cant breathe or think or move)

Have meltdowns

Stay awake at night worrying about things that might happen in the future

Get stomach or head aches

Become very focused on keeping everything in your life exactly the same

Become very focused on having everything in your life happen at exactly the same time each day

If any of this sounds familiar to you, dont worry! This book is full of tactics or strategies that will help you learn to:

Calm your body and mind

Live a calmer and happier life

Cope with normal, day-to-day anxiety

Prevent unhealthy anxiety building up

Prevent meltdowns and panic attacks

Deal with meltdowns and panic attacks when they do happen

Break the loop of worry, where one fear leads to another

Be more resilient (able to cope with difficult things that might happen in the future)

Be mentally fit (just like how exercising gets your body physically fit)

What is brilliant about the tactics in this book is that they all work! But Im not going to lie to you: practising them might not be easy at first. You might find some of them boring. You might try a few things (like closing your eyes and taking deep breaths) that make you feel giggly or a bit uncomfortable. You might feel stressed when you do them at first (which is weird since they are supposed to reduce stress!). But remember that they are NEW . And new can be difficult, especially when you are on the autism spectrum. If you are finding some of the tactics difficult, dont give up. You might not be used to them yet. You might just need a bit of extra help with them. Everyone is different and will like different tactics better than others.

A LESSON FROM TEMPLE GRANDIN ABOUT TRYING NEW THINGS

Temple Grandin is a famous and very clever woman on the autism spectrum. She travels all over the world talking to big groups of people about what it is like to have autism and about all of her amazing achievements. Lots of people on the autism spectrum dont like new things, and Temple says she is one of these people. At one of her talks, she told everyone a story about the first time she went on a rollercoaster. She said that she really didnt like it. But the problem was that she didnt know whether she didnt like it because it was NEW or for some other reason. So you know what she did? She went on the rollercoaster a few more times, just to make sure . Turned out she really didnt like rollercoasters! Temple says that she uses this tactic (trying new things a few times) with everything in her life. And while she probably wont go on a rollercoaster ever again, there are lots of other things in her life that she now loves, all because she kept trying .

HOW YOU CAN USE THIS BOOK

Read it on your own or with another person.

Pick a tactic to work on (it might be a good idea to pick an easy one first).

Put a reminder of the tactic somewhere obvious that you pass by every day (maybe on your bedroom wall or on the fridge).

Practise it every day for about a month.

Get your family or friends involved.

At the end of the month, answer these questions: Is this tactic helping? Do I feel more relaxed or calm after doing it? Do I like it? Do I want to keep doing it?

If the tactic is helping to reduce anxiety, keep doing it every day or when you need it. Then pick another tactic to try.

If the tactic isnt working at the moment, try a new one.

Of course, you dont have to choose just one tactic. Try as many as you like!

CREATING A HABIT

When you do something every day it eventually becomes a HABIT . When something is a habit it takes a lot less effort to do. Sometimes we are not even aware that we are doing it. When you practise these tactics every day at around the same time, you are on your way to turning them into healthy habits to last a lifetime.

ANXIETY AND
THE AUTISM
SPECTRUM

ANXIETY

There are lots of different words for anxiety, like stress, nerves, fears, panic, worries, freaking out, jumpiness, being afraid or agitation. It can feel different at different times. Sometimes it can feel like anger. Sometimes it can make you feel upset, sad, overwhelmed or irritable.

The first thing you need to know about anxiety is that it is NORMAL . Everyone feels anxiety some of the time. In fact, a LITTLE bit of anxiety is a good thing. It helps prepare our bodies for danger. It helps us get things done that need to get done (like study for a big exam). It helps our memory and focus (for example, during that big exam). Some people even say that a little bit of stress as a child is a good thing because it makes us stronger and more able to cope with bad stuff that might happen when we are adults.

The problem is that while a little bit of anxiety is normal or can even be a good thing, TOO MUCH anxiety is like your worst enemy. If your brain was a computer, too much anxiety would be like a computer virus taking over and stopping it working properly. Too much anxiety makes you more likely to get sick. It feels terrible. It can stop you achieving things that you want to in life. It is bad for your relationships with other people. It can make you worry about things that arent real. Because of it, you miss out on a lot of amazing and wonderful things. When you are very anxious you cant think properly. You cant use your words properly or understand fully what people say to you. You get clumsy and bump into things. It is also very hard to make good decisions.

Here is a picture with some of the kinds of THOUGHTS people have when they are anxious or stressed. Do you ever think thoughts like these?

Here is a picture of some of the ways that anxiety can LOOK or FEEL in your body. Do you ever feel any of these?

Here are some pictures of how people sometimes ACT or BEHAVE when they feel anxious.