Kirk Withrow [Withrow - Fun World

FUN WORLD

A ZOMBIE TALE

KIRK WITHROW

Fun World: A Zombie Tale

Copyright 2019 Kirk Withrow

All rights reserved.

No parts of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and situations within its pages and places or persons, living or dead, is unintentional and co-incidental.

Also by Kirk Withrow

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Ninety-five minutes.

Eric Durst couldnt remember waiting in line that long for anything in his entire life. It felt like an eternity had passed, and theyd only moved a few feet. That he hadnt been eager to spend his precious vacation time in the godforsaken park in the first place only made matters worse. Hed argued that braving throngs of ravenous tourists in the most wonderful place in the world during one of the busiest times of the year and in the midst of a burgeoning flu epidemic wasnt the brightest idea, but his pleas had fallen on deaf ears.

Stop being so dramatic. All of the medias scaremongering is making you paranoid. Id say the fact that people like you are too chicken to travel makes it the perfect time to go. Besides, Fun Worlds prices havent been this low in years, his wife, Melanie, argued. Eric knew her derisive tone and sardonic smile were meant to get a rise out of him. He also knew her lighthearted jabs were sure to have the desired effect. They always did.

Chicken, huh? Thats not what you were saying last night, he said with a wry smile that elicited a cautionary glare from his wife. And how many times do I have to tell you, Im not scared of shit? Except maybe clownsbut what sane person isnt scared of those evil bastards? Look, I just think staying around here would be far more relaxing than diving headlong into that corporate cesspool of greed, psychological manipulation, and rampant consumerism. Didnt you read Dantes Inferno in school? You know Fun World was modeled after the fourth circle of hell, right?

At forty years old, the last place Eric wanted to go to was Fun World. Sure, he knew it was less for him and more for his eight-year-old daughter, Lila. But even she seemed a bit old for a kiddie park in his mind. He personally couldnt recall any age in which hed ever wanted to be subjected to such torture. It sounded miserable any way he thought about it, which was saying something considering hed been through basic training. Then again, he always looked at things a little differently than most people he encountered. To him, Fun World was the embodiment of everything that was wrong with society, and vacationing at the premier destination theme park was completely at odds with who he was as a person.

Traveling, in general, had never been one of Erics favorite pastimes. Virtually everyone he knew was continually preparing for his or her next weeklong trip to somewhere. He simply didnt find the same enjoyment in it, a characteristic that utterly perplexed his friends and family. Over the years, hed come to understand that the uncertainty of being away from everything he knew always proved to be stressful and, frankly, irritating. He often wondered if it was an unintended consequence of his military experience, as if the whole travel the world and see exciting places mantra had somehow backfired in his case. Familiarity, on the other hand, was far more relaxing and thus far more comfortable. He was a creature of habit and didnt much care for changes in his routine. Heading out of town for a week was akin to taking a filthy shit on his routine and flushing it right down the toilet.

Eric wasnt a stickler to the point of being inflexible. On the contrary, he possessed an uncanny ability to improvise and make do in virtually any situation. This quality had served him well during his military career and continued to do so in his current job as a paramedic. If he were honest, his love of routine was far more selfish: he liked being in control, and he liked being able to do what he wanted when he wanted to do it. At home, he could go to the gym and train whenever he wanted. He could enjoy the company of his friendsif he wanted. He could sleep in his own bed. This strong streak of self-determination had been one of the main reasons he hadnt reenlisted at the end of his military commitment. Always being told what to do and when to do it had never sat well with him.

In addition, Eric wasnt a fan of crowds, and definitely not crowds of annoying strangers. People tended to be irrational, impulsive, and selfishqualities that often grew exponentially whenever a large group amassed. Crowds of people were far too unpredictable for his liking. He understood that his wife and daughter didnt share his views, and the dichotomy proved to be a constant struggle.

Melanie and Eric had been happily married for nine years, and in that time, hed more or less come to terms with many of her quirks, including her unwavering resolve. When her mind latched onto something it did so with the tenacity of a pit bull on meth. It was one of the things he loved most about herand one of the things that drove him the most insane. This time, the latter sentiment definitely came out on top.

When Melanie recruited their beautiful little girl to her side of the argument, the futility of his opposition became abundantly clear. With blonde hair and electric blue eyes, she was the spitting image of her mother in every way. And just like her mother, she seemed to have his number. As a strong, proud man that wasnt easily swayed by anyone, Eric still marveled at their uncanny ability to bend him to their will. If he were honest, it was a power that he found somewhat frightening. You know what they say: if you cant beat em, join em. Despite arguing his points until he was blue in the face, it seemed his wife and daughter found Fun Worlds magic far more alluring than trivialities like logic and reason. Double-teamed and left with no choice, he finally wilted and reluctantly accepted the path of least resistance rather than continuing to fight a battle he was certain to lose.

Now, six months after his fateful decision, Eric and Lila stood helplessly corralled in a mile-long queue surrounded by a thousand mindless automatons, nearly all of which bore an inexplicably cheery expression. What the hell are all of these sheep smiling about? The path of least resistance my assIve never been more wrong about anything in my life. I cant believe I caved so easily. The rides irritating theme song filled the air, swirling around him like a fly he could never kill. Looking down at Lila, he smiled at the only reason he was there at all. Just one more day Youve survived far worse than this. Even as he thought it, he wasnt entirely convinced it was true. This was miserable.

Eric had put off going to the Happy Little World ride for as long as possible, but the wait time never seemed to drop below an hour and a half. It was the attraction that Lila had wanted to ride more than anything else, and this was their last day in the park. From the beginning of the trip, Eric had envisioned Melanie accompanying Lila on the jolly little adventure through the land of a million creepy puppets. One glance at his wifes bloodred eyes that morning told him that wasnt going to happen. Shed coughed so violently overnight that the tiny blood vessels in her eyes had ruptured, giving them the appearance of a couple of maraschino cherries sitting in her skull. Her pale, mottled skin hung loosely from her petite face, making her look a decade older than she had the day before. It was nearly as striking as the before and after photos they showed on PSAs about the dangers of methamphetamines. Although he would never say it, she looked like death warmed over. The little asshole voice in the back of his mind began chanting, I told you so, but he immediately silenced it. He was as guilty as the next guy of saying stupid things from time to time, but he wasnt a complete idiot, and he certainly didnt have a death wish.