Chappell - Chappelli: life and larrikins

Ian Chappell has plenty of strings to his bow legendary captain of the Australian cricket team; incisive and forthright sports commentator; fearless negotiator with media magnate Kerry Packer; and slightly less fearless runner with the bulls in Pamplona. To name only a few.

In Chappelli: Life, Larrikins and Cricket, Ian takes us on a relaxed, often hilarious, always fascinating journey through his life in cricket and beyond, featuring encounters with everyone from Shane Warne to Sean Connery, from Bradman to Benaud.

Why did Packer call Ian the most difficult bastard on earth? What were the gutwrenching consequences when Ian accused Dennis Lillee of being a medium-pacer? Why was Ian warned about frogs when he ran with the bulls? And why exactly did Doug Walters buy a shirt with six pockets during a tour of Sri Lanka?

This wonderful collection of stories showcases all the characters and events from the extraordinary life of an Aussie sporting immortal.

Id like to dedicate this book to my mother, Jeanne, my wife, Barbara-Ann, and my daughter, Amanda. A man is indeed fortunate to have had the support of three strong women who, all in their own way, have improved my life.

THE FIRST TIME I met Kerry Packer, there was no hello. No how are you, either. Just: What are you? Some sort of fuckin cowboy?

There was every chance we would come to an understanding. We spoke the same language.

At the time I had retired from first-class and international cricket and was just playing club cricket for North Melbourne. I was still living in Adelaide, so Id fly on Friday afternoon and with my cricket gear and a few other items of clothing stored at the Old Melbourne Hotel, Id travel light. Consequently, when I got a message on arrival at Melbourne airport to catch the next flight to Sydney for a meeting with Packer who was in the process of establishing a breakaway World Series Cricket competition I was wearing a pair of jeans, a western-style shirt and a denim jacket.

Hence my outfit and the rather unflattering welcome to his office.

Kerry was in what I later discovered to be his normal pose for meetings; shoes off and feet up on the desk while lounging back in his swivel chair. There was a console on the side of his desk, which contained numerous buttons and a large speaker.

With the niceties out of the way, Kerry then said, Okay, who do you want in this side?

But Im not captain of Australia, I replied. My brother Greg is.

What do you think this is a fuckin democracy? he exploded. I pay the bills, I choose the captain. Youre the captain.

Needing to resolve this issue quickly so it didnt cause a family feud, I asked Kerry if I could at least phone Greg before he made any announcements. That plea was answered in the affirmative.

I called Greg and told him what Kerry proposed. His answer was straight to the point. Ive done it for two years and its a bastard of a job. You can have it.

That hurdle cleared, Kerry repeated the question, Okay, who do you want in this bloody side?

We went through the list, as most of the major players had already been signed. There was one player missing who I wanted.

Id like Mallett in the side, I said.

Im not paying that fuckin straight breaker, he shouted.

This was going to be a problem so I asked if he was prepared to make a deal.

Whats the deal? he demanded.

If Mallett can get you out in one over, I asked, will you sign him?

He thought for a while and then said, Okay.

Shortly afterwards he had his secretary organise regular net sessions so he was prepared for his meeting with Mallett. A few months later Kerry was still having net sessions when he travelled to England to put out a few fires.

Jeff Thomson, the Australian fast bowler, and Alvin Kallicharran, the West Indies batsman, had pulled out of WSC at the urging of their manager, David Lord.

Lord completed this manoeuvre with a flourish, famously saying, Ill break Kerry Packer.

On his arrival in the UK, Kerry read the riot act to the players he had under contract who were on the 1977 Australian touring team. In no uncertain terms he warned of dire consequences if anyone else pulled out. Despite the serious business nature of his visit he still found time to have regular net sessions at Alf Govers indoor cricket school. This was primarily to stay ready for the Mallett challenge but it resulted in a surprise side benefit.

On returning to his suite in the Dorchester Hotel after a meeting, we were sitting around chatting when the butler announced there was a phone call for me. When I answered, the voice at the other end belonged to the no-holds-barred Australian cricket writer Peter McFarline.

Working for the Melbourne Age, McFarline hadnt endeared himself to Kerry when he wrote in a column, Packer not only looks like a hammerhead shark, he acts like one.

On the phone, Peter opened the conversation with a query on whether I was still okay for the match on Sunday. The Australian media team were playing their English counterparts on the Sunday rest day of the Headingley Test and McFarline was captain of the side.

Im fine, I replied. Why? Do you have a problem?

Yes, replied Peter, Im a player short.

Would you like me to see if I can find another player? I asked.

That would be terrific, said McFarline, not bothering to ask who I had in mind.

Just a minute, I replied, as I placed my hand over the mouthpiece.

Turning back to the lounge room I asked, Kerry, would you like a game of cricket on Sunday? Its with the Australian media team; I think you qualify.

He thought for a moment then said, Yes.

Peter McFarline is the captain, I offered, does that change your mind?

Once again he paused for a moment, then said, No, thats fine. Ill play.

Now I turned back to the phone and, removing my hand, told Peter, Ive got you a player.

Thats great, said a genuinely happy McFarline.

His names Kerry Packer, I continued. Is that a problem?

Once again there was a pause and then the answer came back, No, thats not a problem.

And thats how Kerry Packer came to travel to Leeds to play in a cricket match on the same side as Peter McFarline and David Lord. In addition to managing Thomson and Kallicharran, Lord had some media work and he was in the UK fulfilling those commitments.

Adding to the irony of the occasion Kerry took over the wicket-keeping gloves during the England media teams innings. He offered to do the job and took a good catch to dismiss the oppositions best batsman.

Their best player was Peter Lush, who at the time was working with the governing body of the UK first-class game, the Test and County Cricket Board. The TCCB was essentially railroaded by the Australian Cricket Board into an expensive court case against Packer over the restraint-of-trade rights of professional cricketers. The TCCB lost what turned out to be a crucial battle in the attempt to stop World Series Cricket.

In a scorebook somewhere in England theres a delightfully ironic entry that reads: Lush c Packer b Lord.

Later that night, back at Kerrys suite in the Dragonara Hotel in Leeds, we had dinner with England players Tony Greig, Alan Knott, Derek Underwood and captain Mike Brearley. Also in attendance was David Evans, an entrepreneur who was considering sponsorship of the England team in an attempt to stop players defecting to WSC.