Lewis - The Epic Love Story of Doug and Stephen

TheEpic Love Story of Doug and Stephen

byValerie Z. Lewis

http://www.valerielewis.net

ONE

After working withhim for only a few days, Doug decided that he was really veryfrightened of Stephen.

He knew it didn'tlook good to be scared shitless of a guy two years younger and abouttwenty pounds lighter than he was, but Doug couldn't help himself. From the first time they met, Stephen made him anxious anduncomfortable, a formidable achievement considering that Doug wasstoned ninety percent of the time his first week at the magazine. Itwasn't anything Stephen did specifically, just how he was .

For example, Dougwould walk into the break room with his double cheeseburger andsupersized Diet Dr Pepper, see Stephen sitting at one of the tables,and say, "Hey; how's it going?"

Stephenwould look up from the book he was reading - because he was alwaysreading a book - and pause, as if Doug had asked an especiallydifficult question. He would stare for a moment longer than it wassocially acceptable to stare at another person, say, "Fine"flatly, and return to his book.

After the first fewawkward interactions, Doug thought maybe Stephen was shy. This wouldalso explain the books, because Doug couldn't think of another reasonwhy someone would read so much. But when Doug would try to draw himout with more open-ended questions, Stephen's replies remained thesame. He would raise his eyes to meet Doug's, give him an extended,vacant look, and grunt out "fine" or "sure". Hisanswer to everything was one murmured word, whether the question was,"What's up?" "How's the weather outside?" or"What's a good place to get a burger around here?" Thelatter exchange led to a moment of confusion between Doug and hiscubicle-neighbor Billy, when Doug asked him how to get to arestaurant named "Whatever".

Sometimes his longstares and short answers bordered on menacing. Like one time whenDoug poked his head into Stephen's office and said, "Hey, I'mgonna get a sandwich. You wanna get a sandwich?" Stephenlooked up from his computer with an expression as if Doug hadsuggested that they steal a car, drive to a pet store, and kill somepuppies. He seemed genuinely offended that Doug had invited him outfor a sandwich, and for a moment Doug was sure Stephen was going topunch him. But then Stephen's face blanked out again as he slowlysaid, "No. Thanks." And returned to his stupid book.

Doug was tempted togo to Russell, the Editor-In-Chief, and tell him he suspected Stephenwas evil, but quickly reconsidered, since he really needed this job.

At first Doug'sagent had been hesitant about the job. "It's an open call formodels, with the possibility of a semi-permanent position," theman explained as Doug sat in his Fifth Avenue office and stared atthe small electric tranquility fountain on his desk. "Butbefore you get excited, you should know that it's a magazine gearedto the homosexual community. It's called TheFlame . I'm not sure if this is the kind of exposure we want. You couldeasily get pigeonholed into "

"It's cool,"Doug said, putting his finger into the trickling stream of water tosee if he could make it spray outside its circle of rocks. "Ijust need to do something. I'm a really bad waiter. Yesterday Ispilled some stuff on this guy, and he got all pissed off."

"I just wantyou to know that there are other options," the agent continued. Its a shame you cant do hand modeling, but you can still "

"I need themoney," Doug interrupted. "I have, you know, obligations. And not just to myself. I have to think about my car."

"Get yourfinger out of my fountain."

Doug liked modelingbecause it was easy. All he had to do was stand there for a while,and then let people tell him different ways to stand. On one of hisfirst real jobs - a catalog shoot where he posed on a basketballcourt in baggy jeans - the photographer screamed at him inPortuguese, but most of the time everyone was nice. If he said hewas thirsty, they would give him water or coffee for free, and onceat a Gap audition they gave him an orange. Even though Doug didn'tget the Gap ad, he thought the orange thing was pretty cool of them.

The Flame put him in a group shot with a few other guys all modeling the bigsummer fashions, which seemed to consist solely of spandex swimwear. They stood around in a studio on the third floor of a building onHudson Street, and were instructed to look at the camera as if theywere incredibly bored. Doug didn't think he did a good job lookingbored, since at the time he only felt kind of cold.

But he mustvedone something right, because a week later Doug was called back tothe magazine for an interview with Russell. Russell was amiddle-aged man with precise hair who wore sweaters with black jeansand acted as if his magazine was simply a way to pass the time untilsomething interesting happened. He was perpetually bored, which Dougfound refreshing. Everyone hed met at his job the previous day a photo shoot for some new type of vodka - was much too serious, fromthe photographer who yelled, You are relaxed! You are happy andat ease! to the stylist whod leaned down as she was doingDougs hair to whisper ominously, I think you may beover-conditioning.

As he lazily flippedthrough proofs, Russell explained that they wanted to expand theirfashion section, and were looking for a model and writer to join thestaff part-time.

"You'd workeight hours a day, four days a week," Russell said, placinganother page in a pile on his cluttered desk without looking at it. "And one hour on Fridays for staff meetings. You'd be doing thejob of an Assistant Editor, only you wouldn't be an Assistant Editor,because then we'd have to give you benefits, and we're not going togive you benefits."

"Cool,"Doug said. "I don't know if I can write stuff, but I'm a reallybad waiter." He picked up a rubber band off Russell's desk andasked if he could keep it.

The column, whichRussell titled Doug Bruce Breaks It Down, covered two pages inthe weekly ten-page fashion section. One page would show himmodeling a certain item of clothing, chosen ahead of time by theFashion Department, which was also known as Alex. (On his first dayof work he wandered into the photo studio to ask where the FashionDepartment was, and Alex responded by flinging his arms open, whichjust made Doug really confused.) On the opposite page Doug wouldwrite a short article explaining whether or not he liked theclothing, and advising readers where they could purchase it. Hisfinished articles were always really different from than he'dsubmitted. When he asked Russell about this, Russell just said thatthe Editor-In-Chief did rewrites of everyone's work.

The pictures madeeven less sense than the articles. For one thing, the clothes he wassupposed to be showcasing were rarely on his body. For an articleabout Kenneth Cole shoes, Alex instructed him to wear only one of theshoes, and put the other shoe over his groin as he reclined in achair without any other clothes on. When he did a piece about RalphLauren's line of fall jackets, he was posed naked again, this timefacing away from the camera, holding the jacket over his shoulder.

But Doug didn'tmind, because they paid him five hundred dollars for each article,which was a lot for just standing around naked every Monday andspending the rest of the week sitting in his cubicle playing Tetris.

He met Stephen theday before his first staff meeting. He'd already handed in hisarticle for the week the one about the shoe over his crotch so he decided to spend the rest of the day playing with his rubberband. His goal was to flick it at the wall hard enough so that itwould bounce back into his lap, but he'd only managed to get it tobounce as far as the dusty phone in the center of his desk.

As he stretched hisfingers apart in preparation for another launch, Stephen walked intothe cubicle abruptly, holding a black binder and a stack of papers,ragged hair hanging over his glasses, already muttering before he'dgotten in the room.