Ken Swarner - Why Did God Give My Kids Free Will?: He Couldve Waited until They Moved Out

Its amazing how many moms and dads believe they are terribly imperfect parents. They are worried, stressed, self-conscious, and guilt-ridden about it, to the point where they doubt their natural instincts and can even lose their faith in God.

Who decides who is perfect anyway? Where do we even get terms like that? Certainly, God discovered that His children, Adam and Eve, werent flawless, and yet He still managed to get through the eternities. So why does it bother us so much that our lives get messy and people know it?

Probably because we all know perfect parents, right? Those moms and dads who are well-groomed and stable, with impeccable little children who are neatly dressed, fold their hands piously in the pew, get good grades, and dont burp the words to the National Anthem at the ballpark. But seriously, do we want to be like those people?

Heck yeah!

And yet, here we are far from perfect, trying to take measure of Gods plan for us, and wondering why it always seems to include poor report cards and nasty notes from the Sunday school teacher.

It certainly reminds me of that time my wife came home ranting after shed taken our son to the doctor for his annual physical. It took a while to understand her, but in so many words, she said, We have to find a new pediatrician.

Why does it bother us so much that our lives get messy and people know it?

I patted the seat next to me and asked her to sit down. Okay, sweetheart, why do we need to find a new doctor?

She drew in a deep breath. I took our son to get his physical.

And?

And when the nurse told our son to strip down to his socks and underwear, she gasped.

Because shes never seen a boy in his underwear?

No, because your son was wearing socks that belong in a compost bin.

I cringed.

I dont think hes changed them for a week, she continued with tears forming in her eyes. I forgot to check before we left home.

I held her hand. Are you feeling badly because the nurse said something to you?

She nodded.

What did she say?

I dont knowI couldnt understand her with her hand over her nose.

I smiled. Okay, so they were dirty. Thats not the end of the world, is it?

She shook her head. The dirt wasnt nearly as bad as his big toe sticking through his sock.

I winced. What about the other sock?

You mean the one that looked like a flip-flop?

I stood up and paced the room. So what happened next?

The nurse asked if our son would be more comfortable in his bare feet, she said.

And?

And your son took off his socks before I could stop him.

Uh-oh. How did his feet look?

She squeezed her eyes shut. Well, he will definitely need some moss control this spring.

Good Lord. What did you do?

What any mortified mother would do, she answered. I lunged across the room and covered his feet with a magazine.

Did the nurse look shocked?

I dont know. She ran out of the room when I screamed, Take me, Jesus!

I gave my wife a moment to collect herself.

So next, she continued, I spit in my hand and started washing his feet. But that went too slowly, so I hoisted him on the counter, put his feet in the sink, and gave him a sponge bath.

That worked? I asked.

All but the dirty toenails. I scraped those clean with a tongue depressor.

Did anyone catch you?

No, but the doctor walked in just as I was drying his feet off with gauze.

What did he say?

He said that he raised three boys himself, and he knew exactly what I was going through.

I smiled with relief. So then why did you say we needed to switch pediatricians?