Paul Doherty - Domina

Was I in at the end? Naturally! Did I witness her murder? Of course I did! Did I survive? Well, I am here to tell the tale. Nevertheless, I sense the hidden meaning behind such questions. Yes, something in me died with her. I am only glad that, before we parted, she explained who she really was. I am Parmenon, servant to the Goddess, Domina Agrippina. When a star falls from heaven it never falls alone. I fell with her.

They tried to make it look like an accident, but of course it was murder. The monster Lucius Domitius Ahenobarbus, known as Nero, is a matricide, was a matricide, will be a matricide as long as time runs. Truth will out, be it in a blaze of fire or creeping like water through fissures and cracks. Domina was hardly cold in her grave when leather bags were hung on Neros statue. Do you understand the significance of that? It means that Nero should be stitched into such a bag and thrown into the Tiber, the just fate for an assassin! A baby was abandoned in the forum, with a tag on its cradle reading: I WONT MURDER YOU BUT I LEAVE YOU SO WHEN YOU GROW UP YOU WONT MURDER ME.

Dominas statues were torn down but a wit daubed an inscription on one of the plinths, a quotation from the Classics: I am disgraced, but you are ashamed. I especially liked one piece of graffiti for its cleverness: A novel calculation: Nero= slew his own mother. A Greek must have written that. (Thank the Gods for the Classics.) Greek numbers are designated by letters of the alphabet, so to put it simply: Neron, in Greek, is equivalent to 1005; the phrase, slew his own mother also comes to 1005. Nero would take some time to work that out, if he ever did.

Others were more blatant. Dartius, a performer of farces, at the end of one his shows, shouted: Farewell, Father! Farewell, Mother! But, instead of waving goodbye at this point, Dartius imitated the gestures of drunkenness and swimming. It brought the house down though Dartius had to flee Rome by dead of night. The hypocrite Nero staged games to mark the death of his Pia Mater Agrippina had to be mourned. Nero, following the advice of his creature Anicetus, put on a splendid festival, the climax of which was a tightrope-walking elephant. Oh Gods, can you imagine it? An elephant walking a rope? Was that the imperial salute for the daughter of Germanicus, his own mother?

Let me tell my story from the end rather than the beginning. As in all things, it takes a woman to destroy another. In Dominas case, it was that tasty morsel Poppea, wife of General Otho until she caught Neros eye. Poppea was a ripe grape ready for the plucking, with her beautiful face and a body so rich youd groan at the very sight of it. Poppea the pretty; Poppea the petulant; Poppea with her sun-gold ring of curls; Poppea the spider; Poppea the assassin! Poppea was determined to share Neros bed. To achieve that she had to surmount a number of obstacles, which she did with consummate ease. Now, Poppea could easily remove her own husband as well as Neros wife; after all, in Rome, divorce was as common as murder. Otho was only too willing to give up his wife, whilst Nero and Octavia couldnt stand the sight of each other. Both Octavia and Otho were quite prepared to leave the stage to the gorgeous, pouting Poppea, but not Agrippina. A woman who had survived the intrigues of Caligula, the machinations of Claudius, the murderous malice of Messalina? Agrippina was made of sterner stuff. Goddesses do not go into retirement. They either live for ever or die.

So, how do you kill the Queen of Poison? How do you wipe out someone schooled in the harsh atmosphere of the House of Livia, Augustuss great wife? Agrippina knew every poison available. Her cupboards were full of the antidotes which she regularly took. Poisoning in Neros Rome was becoming virtually impossible. There was a legion of tasters, not to mention spies, in the kitchen. The principal rule at an imperial banquet was to eat only from a dish which had been carefully tasted beforehand. Ive seen many a glorious supper come to an abrupt end at the slightest hint of indigestion amongst its guests. So you can understand Nero and Poppeas problem. Right from the start they plotted Dominas murder. However, whilst selling the bearskin is easy, trapping and killing its owner, to misquote the mischievous Petronius, is a different kettle of fish.

There is always the sword and in the end thats what it came to, but how do you bribe someone to kill your mother, an Empress of Rome? So round and round and round the plotters went. Nero loved his mother, youll say, it must have been difficult for him. Nero loved nobody! His own father once remarked that anyone who inherited his and Agrippinas blood would turn out to be a bad lot. He didnt mean it as a prophecy, just a statement of fact. Oh yes, Ive heard about the allegations of incest: the tumbling in the litter, the stains on Neros clothing. Just bear with me and Ill explain them in due course. Its the murder we begin with.

Agrippina, may the Gods bless her, suspected it was coming. We were in the gardens at her favourite villa at Antium. We were sitting, as we often did, wetting our feet in a fountain, with a bowl of grapes and a jug of wine between us. Agrippina was tense. She sat, as she always did when spinning her web, with her shoulders slightly hunched. A light sheen of sweat glistened on her full face; her black hair was tied tightly back, except for two corkscrew strands which fell over the ears. She was talking to herself, lips soundlessly moving. Now and again she would pause to chew on a grape and squint up against the sun. It was is a beautiful place with raised paths, greenery, flower beds, splashing water, shadowy porticoes and fragrant arbours. Just the spot to contemplate your own end.

We are all murderers, Parmenon! Agrippinas tone was meditative, almost as if she was speaking aloud but unaware of anyone listening.

I could have objected, asked her to explain. It wasnt the time. Agrippina turned and yawned, displaying those double canine teeth. Her lips were purple, grape-stained. I recalled the accusation that she was blood hungry: a killer born and bred, more ferocious than any animal in the amphitheatre. Those double canines only enhanced such a reputation, giving a slight twist to her lips. Yet this was offset by those lovely, well-spaced, dark eyes which could crinkle in amusement, flirt outrageously or glare in murderous passion.

Agrippina was very proud of her eyes. In her youth she used to remark, Let me stare at a man long enough and hes mine. It wasnt so much a boast as the truth. I mean, listen to dramatists talking about characterisation and developing different personae. Its nonsense! Most people are simple and boring. Their lives tend to be dominated by a few questions. How they look? Are they healthy? Will they earn a lot of money? Are they in or out of favour? Agrippina was different. You could tell that from her eyes: maternal, soft and tender, cold and dispassionate, amusing, seductive. Her moods could change so quickly. Oh, I concede she was dangerous. Any member of that family was dangerous!

She studied me closely in that lovely villa garden, a faraway look in her eyes.

Do you accept that, Parmenon? That we are all murderers? How long is my list?

I gestured with my hand. She flicked a grape at me.

Come on, Parmenon, tell me. I know youve kept count.

Domina, its so long, it would be easier to say who wasnt on it!

Agrippina laughed. My mind was already going through the table of names. Drusus, starved to death in his prison beneath the Palatine, reduced to eating the stuffing from his mattress. Sejanus, his strangled, cat-scratched body thrust into a sack and thrown down the Stairs of Mourning. Caligula, his plotting senators drawing their swords, abruptly realising that, despite all the fuss, he really wasnt a god.