Shayna Brazier - Anxiety Makes Me Anxious

Written by: Shayna Brazier

Illustrated by: Jake Bush

Copyright

Copyright 2017 by Shayna Brazier

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof

may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever

without the express written permission of the author

except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

For permission requests please contact: Shayna Brazier at:

AnxietyMakesMeAnxious@gmail.com

Printed in the United States of America

First Printing, 2017

Library of Congress Control Number: 2017902279

ISBN 978-0-9987247-1-3

The Happiness Center

1106 E. Rogen Way

Superior, CO 80027

www.thehappinesscenter.com

I dedicate this book to myself for going through all that pain and anxiety that inspired such a masterpiece.

Just kidding, I dedicate it to everyone who has helped me live a full and happy and anxious life including: my husband and kids, my family, my friends, nurses and doctors, flight attendants, forest rangers, grocery clerks, inventor of Xanax, meteorologists, engineers and therapists

Table of Contents

Anxiety Makes Me Anxious

Dedication

Chapter 1: Flying

Chapter 2: Animals

Chapter 3: Weather

Chapter 4: Tunnels, Caves, & Elevators

Chapter 5: Hypochondria

Chapter 6: Everyday life

Introduction

Anxiety is like gas. All of us have a little of it and some of us have a lot of it. It can make going to social events a little harder but when the dust settles and the moments pass, we can look back on them and realize that they are so, so funny. If you are reading this then you probably have anxiety, know someone who struggles with anxiety, help someone who lives with anxiety, or you live in a cave on another planet. There is a plethora of serious books about anxiety and the different things you can do to ease this disorder. They tell you that there is hope, and that with the help of the author (who is also a doctor) you will overcome this horrible plight and come out a survivor. This is NOT one of those books, although I have read and loved many of those. If you expect this book to give you therapeutic advice on how to cure your anxiety in 50 simple steps, then you are going to be disappointed. On the other hand, if you want to have a good laugh to spite your worries and feel a little more normal and slightly less psycho about your anxiety then read on! Also if you dont worry very much, or worry just a little and need ideas about what new things to worry about, then be relieved that your investment of $35 at Barnes and Nobles, or heaven forbid 25 cents at the nearest garage sale, was well worth it.

Anxiety can be crippling. It can make you want to give up on all the things that you love. It can make you want to cut yourself off from loved ones, acquaintances, and total strangers. It can literally make youliterally, not figuratively, literallydepressed and tired. Man this book is making me depressed. Is there any hope at all? If not, that would be a short book, and a long lawsuit. The answer is yes! There is hope! You can have your anxiety and eat it tooI mean live life too. Is this easier said than done? Of course it is! Everything that is worth it is easier said than done. The thing that I hate the most about anxiety is that it has somehow become this very sad and sheltered disorder which it is, but that doesnt mean that it is not also incredibly funny. I think that anxiety makes for the best stories! Going on a trip to lets say a haunted forest with normal peoplenormal. Going to this forest with someone who has anxietyhilarious. How do I know this? I have anxiety. I go on trips. This makes me an expert on the matter.

A hero of mine, Marjorie Hinckley, once said, The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache.On that note, here is a little glimpse into my life with anxiety. There is no one better than myself to share this story since I have been with myself with anxiety my whole life.

Whoever said that there is nothing to fear but fear itself was not very creative. Off the top of my head, without even blinking, I can think of 10 really good things to fear and about 25 more mediocre ones. You see, I was born a worrier. Have you ever noticed how worrier and warrior are so close? Im pretty sure I was meant to be a warrior, but somewhere in my DNA I was supposed to have two red segments and a blue, and I ended up with two blues and a red or something crazy like that. Either way, while most babies were enjoying the lullabies of soothing amniotic fluid, Im pretty sure I was worrying about the chord cutting off my air supply or my feet coming out first. Yes, I was a very intelligent fetus.

My parents told me that one of the funniest things was sitting me up next to a tissue when I was a baby. They would blow on it causing it to move and I would freak out (this was obviously before parents got overly scrutinized for every character building prank). I grew up in a normal family in a normal town. I have two brothers and one sister, some of whom have anxiety as well. I dont remember feeling different as a kid because, like I said, anxiety has ALWAYS been a part of my life.

I have a vivid memory of getting a sled for Christmas one year, and my sister and I went to sit on it in the living room. For the purpose of slowing down, there was a foot lever on the sled made of plastic. My sister went to step on it and I lunged at her. I was convinced that she would start that sled and we would fly right through the wall into the kitchen. Pretty much any time we would do something fun, I would worry about a tragic outcome but I would still do it, mostly because my mom and dad made me and partially because my need to love life was heavy enough to tip the scales in favor of fun. If we were going skiing, the chair lift cable could snap and we could plummet to the ground. At the water parks, I would be on the lookout for people drowning at the bottom of the wave pools. When we went on road trips, I would stare out the front window, partially so I wouldnt get car sick and partially to pay attention to the traffic in case I needed to alert my dad to something out of the ordinary. I had anxiety way before I knew what anxiety was, and way way before it was so widely talked about.

Somewhere along the line, I earned the title of worry wart. I tried to change that to concerned crusader or vigilant viking, but worry wart is what stuck, and Ive proudly carried that label ever since. You see, in my mind worriers arent freaks, people with no fears are freaks! How can you be afraid of nothing?

My First Panic Attack

Much like a first kiss or a first car, I have a place in my heart for my first true panic attack (right next to first broken bone and first public vomiting). I was in my early twenties and had just moved to Denver with my husband Drew and our 5-month old daughter. Ironically, Drew was going to grad school for a doctorate in Clinical Psychology. I told Drew that because he wasnt crazy enough to be a shrink (come on, we ALL know that shrinks are cray cray), he needed to marry me to be able to have personal experience with the psycho things he was about to learn. Anyways, that summer was particularly challenging because we moved to Denver a semester early for a summer job that Drew had lined up.