My hands are red with blood. Im running through a forest. Naked, but I dont care. Im an animal, not a human. Animals dont need clothes.
Blood on my tongue too. Must have fed recently. Cant remember if it was a wild creature or a person. Not bothered much either way. Still hungrythats all that matters. Need to find something new to chew. And soon.
I leap a fallen log. As I land, my bare feet hit twigs. They snap and I sink into a pool of mud. I collapse, howling. The twigs bite into me. I catch a glimpse of fiery red eyes peering up out of the mud. They arent twigstheyre teeth! I lash out with my feet, screaming wordlessly
and mud and bits of bark fly everywhere. I stare at the mess suspiciously, my heart rate returning to normal. I was wrong. I havent fallen victim to a monstrous baby with mouths in the palms of its hands and balls of fire where its eyes should be. Its just a muddy hole, covered with the remains of branches and leaves.
Scowling, I rise and wipe my feet clean on clumps of nearby grass. As Im using my nails to pick off some splinters, a voice calls, Grubbs
The name doesnt register immediately. Then I rememberthats my name. Or it used to be, once upon a time. I glance up warily, sniffing the air, but all I can smell is blood.
Grubitsch the voice murmurs and I growl angrily. I hate my real name. Grubbs isnt great, but its better than Grubitsch. Nobody ever called me that except Mum and my sister Gret.
You cant find me, the voice teases.
I roar into the darkness of the forest, then lurch at the bushes where I think the voice is coming from. I tear through them but theres nothing on the other side.
Wrong, the voice laughs, coming from a spot behind me.
I whirl and squint, but I cant see anyone.
Over here, the voice whispers. This time its coming from my right.
Still squinting, I edge closer, towards the source of the voice. This feels wrong, like its a trap. But I cant back away from it. Im drawn on by curiosity, but also something else. Its a girls voice and I think I know whose it is.
Movement to my left, just as Im about to round a tree. Eight long, pale arms wave in the light of the moon. Dozens of tiny snakes hiss and slither. I cry out with fear and slam into the tree, shielding my eyes from the horror. Seconds pass but nothing attacks. Lowering my arms, I realise the arms were just branches of a couple of neighbouring trees. The snakes were vines, blowing in the wind.
I feel sick but I force a weak chuckle, then slide around the tree in search of the person who called to me.
Im at the edge of a pond. I frown at it. I know this forest and there should be no pond here. But there it lies regardless, the full moon reflected in its still surface. Im thirsty. The blood has dried on my tongue, leaving a nasty copper-like taste. I crouch to drink from the pond, going down on all fours and lowering my head to the water like a wolf.
I see my face in the mirror-like water before I drink. Blood everywhere, caked into my flesh and hair. My eyes widen and fill with fear. Not because of the blood, but because I can see the shadow of somebody behind me.
I start to turn, but its too late. The girl pushes my head down hard and I go under. Water fills my mouth and I gag. I try to fight but the girl is strong. She holds me down and my lungs fill. The coppery taste is still there and I realise, as I blink with horrified fascination, that the pond is actually a pool of blood.
As my body goes limp, the girl pulls me up by my hair and laughs shrilly as I draw a hasty, terrified breath. You always were a useless coward, Grubitsch, she sneers.
Gret? I moan, staring up at the mocking smile of my sister. I thought you were dead.
No, she croaks, eyes narrowing and snout lengthening. You are.
I weep as her face transforms into that of a mutant wolf. I want to run or hit her, but I can only sit and stare. Then, as the transformation ends, she opens her mouth wide and howls. Her head shoots forward. Her fangs fasten around my throat. She bites.
I wake choking. I want to scream but in my imagination Grets teeth are locked around my throat. I lash out at my dead sister, still half in the dream world. When my arm fails to connect, I rub at my eyes and my bedroom swims back into sight around me.
Groaning softly, I sit up and dangle my legs over the edge of the bed. Covering my face with my hands, I recall the worst parts of the dream, then shiver and get up to go to the toilet. No point trying to sleep again tonight. I know from past experience that the nightmares will be even worse if I do.
I pause in the doorway of the bathroom, suddenly certain that demons are lurking in the shadows. If I turn on the light, theyll attack. I know its ridiculous, a ripple from the nightmare, but despite that my finger trembles in the air by the switch, refusing to press.
The hell with it, I finally sigh, stepping forward. Letting my fear have its way on this night, as on so many others, I go about my business in the dark.
Of course I have nightmareswho doesnt?
Every night?
No.
Most nights?
A pause. No.
But a lot?
I shrug and look away. Im in Mr. Mauchs office. Misery Mauchthe school counsellor. He holds court a few times a week. Chats with students who are struggling with homework, peer pressure, pushy parents. Normal kids with normal problems. And then theres me.
Misery loves sitting down for a wartsnall session with me.
Why wouldnt he? Everyone here knows the Grubbs Grady storyparents and sister slaughtered in front of him long months locked up in a nuthouse (incarcerated in a facility for the temporarily disturbed, Misery puts it) came to Carcery Vale to live in a spooky old house with his uncle Dervish that uncle lost his marbles soon after Grubbs played nurse for a year until he recovered went to a movie set with Dervish and his friend Bill-E Spleen months later witnessed the tragic deaths of hundreds of people when a disastrous fire burnt the set to the ground.
With a history like that, Im a dinosaur-sized bone for every psychiatric dog within a hundred kilometre radius!
Would you like to tell me about your dreams, Grubitsch? Misery asks.
No.
Are you sure?
I feel like laughing but dont. Miserys harmless. It cant be much fun, trekking around his small cache of schools, dealing with the same boring teenage problems day after day, year after year. If I was in his shoes, Id be itching to get my hands on a juicily messed-up student like me too.
Grubitsch? Misery prods after a few seconds of silence.
Hmm?
Telling me about your dreams might help. A problem shared is a problem halved.
I almost respond with, Whats a clich shared? but again I hold my tongue. Id ruin Miserys day if I cut him down like that. Might reduce him to tears.
Theyre not much of a problem, sir, I say instead, trying to wind the session down. Im missing physics and I quite like that subject.
Please, Grubitsch, call me William.
Sorry, sirI mean, William.
Misery smiles big, as if hes made a breakthrough. The nightmares must be a problem if theyre not going away, he presses gently. If you told me, perhaps we could find a way to stop them.
I dont think so, I respond, a bit sharper than I meant. Hes talking about stuff which is way over his head. I dont mind a school counsellor showing interest in me but I dislike the way hes acting like a second-rate mind-sleuth, clumsily trying to draw out my secrets.
I didnt mean to offend you, Grubitsch, Misery says quickly, realising hes overstepped the mark.