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Donahue - Shifting Sands

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Donahue Shifting Sands
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We had no vehicle. We didnt know how or if we could continue heading south. I was in a vast, seemingly endless desert. I didnt know when or if wed make it to the other side. I didnt even know where the other side was. It wasnt in Algeria. I knew that much. Was it in Niger? Where does the Sahara actually end?We live in a culture, Donahue writes, which loves climbing mountains. We want to see the peak, map out a route, and follow it to the top. Sometimes this approach works, but not always, particularly when we are enduring a personal crisis-divorce, job loss, addiction, illness, or death. We may not know exactly where we are going, how to get there, or even how well know weve arrived.And its not just in times of crisis. There are many deserts in our lives, situations with no clear paths or boundaries. Finding a job is usually a mountain, but changing careers can be a desert. Having a baby is a mountain, especially for the mom. But raising a child is a desert....

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Shifting Sands Copyright 2004 by Steve Donahue All rights reserved No - photo 1


Shifting Sands


Copyright 2004 by Steve Donahue
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed Attention: Permissions Coordinator, at the address below.

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Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.
235 Montgomery Street, Suite 650
San Francisco, California 94104-2916
Tel: (415) 288-0260, Fax: (415) 362-2512
www.bkconnection.com


Ordering information for print editions
Quantity sales. Special discounts are available on quantity purchases by corporations, associations, and others. For details, contact the Special Sales Department at the Berrett-Koehler address above.
Individual sales. Berrett-Koehler publications are available through most bookstores. They can also be ordered directly from Berrett-Koehler: Tel: (800) 929-2929; Fax: (802) 864-7626; www.bkconnection.com
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Berrett-Koehler and the BK logo are registered trademarks of Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.


First Edition
Paperback print edition ISBN 978-1-57675-280-7
PDF e-book ISBN 978-1-57675-976-9
IDPF ISBN : 9-781-60994-387-5


2008-1


Illustration credits: Map: Hugh DAndrade (www.hughillustration.com); Photographs not otherwise credited were taken by the author.


Developmental Editing: Ocean Lum. Copyediting: Elissa Rabellino. Design and production: Richard Wilson. Indexing: Rachel Rice. Proofreading: Carolyn Uno. Cover design: Leslie Waltzer, Crowfoot Design. Cover photograph: Stan Zippan.

Preface The first speech I gave about the Sahara Desert caught me by - photo 3
Preface

The first speech I gave about the Sahara Desert caught me by surprise. I was hired to address the meeting of an association of asphalt-road builders who were notorious for being a difficult audience. I had no idea what to talk about. Then I remembered the paved road that crosses part of the Sahara. At a certain point the road ends. You arent really anywhereit just stops. Life is like that, too. Sometimes the paved road youve been speeding along quite comfortably suddenly ends and youre in a desert. I was surprised by how much the road builders liked the story and the slides. I decided to focus on presentations about crossing the Sahara, and my speaking career took off.

My next surprise about the power of the desert metaphor came from an unlikely source: a mountain climber. He was a motivational speaker who sat next to me on an airplane, and his claim to fame was climbing Mount Everest. On more than one occasion a prospective client had hired him instead of me. He charged twice as much as I did and was three times as busy. I had a bad case of professional jealousy. But he seemed friendly enough, and after a couple of drinks I began to relax. Then he told me that he planned to cross the Arabian Desert, write a book about the adventure, and start giving speeches about crossing deserts. I ordered another drink.

Alcohol combined with the lack of oxygen in an airplane triggers air rage in some passengers. Others react to the mix of booze and altitude with a more common side effect: air blabber. Suddenly your mouth has a mind of its own. The person next to you becomes a combination of therapist, long-lost friend, and spiritual advisor. Fortunately we were both afflicted with air blabber. We began conversing in earnest. He asked me practical questions about crossing deserts. I asked him a question hed probably heard a thousand times.

How big is the top of Mount Everest?

About the size of a small kitchen table, he responded.

Thats amazing, I said. You know, when you cross the Sahara Desert, there is no way of knowing where the desert ends. Theres no peak, no border, no sign that says, You Are Now Leaving the Sahara DesertHave a Nice Day!

He laughed and shook his head. I guess Ill find out soon enough that mountains and deserts are much different from one another.

When the plane landed, it was very late. We mumbled some farewells and promised to stay in touch. Waiting for my luggage to appear, I couldnt stop thinking of mountains and deserts. They are two of the most powerful symbols we have. Throughout history, most cultures and most of the worlds major religions have used these symbols to illustrate values and teachings. My speaking colleague was rightthey are literally not the same. And they are also metaphorically quite different.

Was it possible that we struggle in times of change because the ever-shifting quality of life defies the goal-setting, strategic-planning approach of the mountain-climbing metaphor? The divorce I was struggling with at that time was certainly not going according to plan. Many of the people I spoke to in large corporations undergoing mergers and reorganizations seemed to suffer all the more from setting goals that couldnt be reached or making plans that kept changing. I wondered if life and its inevitable transitions could be less upsetting and even more fulfilling if we stopped thinking about everything as a goal to achieve that simply required the right map to get us to the summit.

Several years and a few metaphorical deserts later, I am just as surprised to have written a book about my wonderings and my wanderings. I hope my ideas and experiences help you cross your own deserts of change.

Acknowledgments

There are many people who assisted or inspired me in writing this book. Id like to thank the following:

George Donahue, my dad, for bringing me a T-shirt from virtually every country he visited on business, and for making travel seem exotic and exciting.

Julie Donahue, my mom, for encouraging me to follow my heart, even if it meant that Id probably spend most of my life living far away from her.

Chlo and Spirit, my kids, for making me laugh when I needed to.

Pamela Mountjoy, my friend, for believing in this book more than I did at times and for being the glue that held me and this book together from start to finish.

Carol Roth, my literary agent, for her steadfast belief in the power of my story and her determination to find the right publisher.

Tom Bowes and the staff at InCourage, for seeing new ways to share the desert metaphor with organizations in transition.

Ocean Lum, my first-draft editor, for her discerning intellect, which kept me focused on a coherent message.

Linda Davidson and her team at Canspeak, for encouraging me to pick up my pen and finally start writing.

Bobby Neufeld, my friend and mountaineering companion, for taking me into the high country and defending the spirit of real mountain climbers when I got carried away with my metaphor.

Judith Moser, my friend, for her support and insights as Ive crossed my own deserts of change.

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