National Cancer Institute (U.S.) - Taking Time: Support for People with Cancer

This booklet is only one of many free booklets for people with cancer. Here are some others you and your loved ones may find useful:

• Chemotherapy and You
• Coping With Advanced Cancer
• Eating Hints for Cancer Patients
• Taking Part in Cancer Treatment Research Studies
• Cancer Pain Control
• Radiation Therapy and You
• When Cancer Returns
• When Someone You Love Is Being Treated for Cancer
• When Someone You Love Has Advanced Cancer
• When Your Brother or Sister Has Cancer: A Guide for Teens
• When Your Parent Has Cancer: A Guide for Teens

These booklets are available online from the National Cancer Institute (NCI). To learn more about the specific type of cancer you have or to request any of these booklets, visit NCIs website (www.cancer.gov). You can also call NCIs Contact Center at 1-800-4-CANCER (1-800-422-6237) to speak with an information specialist.

Millions of Americans alive today have a history of cancer. For them, cancer has become a chronic (on-going) health problem, like high blood pressure or diabetes.

If you have cancer, you may notice every ache, pain, or sign of illness. Even little aches may make you worry. You may even think about dying. While its normal to think these thoughts, its also important to focus on living. Although some people do die of the disease, many are treated successfully. Others will live a long time after treatment ends. So, try to make the most of each day while living with cancer and its treatment.

This book was written to help you learn from other people with cancer. Many people have helped write this bookpatients, their family members, and friends. You will see their comments in all sections of the book. Finding out how others respond to cancer might help you understand your own feelings. And learning how others manage the special problems that cancer brings might help you find ways to cope with the problems that come along for you.

No two people are alike. Some chapters of this book may apply to your situation and others may not. Read the chapters that have meaning to you. The other chapters may be useful later on.

This book is divided into seven chapters, plus a resource section at the end. Each chapter begins with a Read This First box, which tells you what is in that chapter. In addition, each chapter ends with a Summing Up box, which repeats the key ideas in that chapter.

As you read this booklet, remember, right nowits all about you!

No one knows the story of tomorrows dawn.

Ashanti (African) Proverb

You will have many feelings after you learn that you have cancer. These feelings can change from day to day, hour to hour, or even minute to minute.

Learning that you have cancer can come as a shock. How did you react? You may have felt numb, frightened, or angry. You may not have believed what the doctor was saying. You may have felt all alone, even if your friends and family were in the same room with you. These feelings are normal.

For many people, the first few weeks after diagnosis are very hard. After you hear the word cancer, you may have trouble breathing or listening to what is being said. When youre at home, you may have trouble thinking, eating, or sleeping.

People with cancer and those close to them experience a wide range of feelings and emotions. These feelings can change often and without warning.

At times, you may:

• Be angry, afraid, or worried
• Not really believe that you have cancer
• Feel out of control and not able to care for yourself
• Be sad, guilty, or lonely
• Have a strong sense of hope for the future

This chapter looks at many of the feelings that come up when people find out they have cancer.

Once people accept that they have cancer, they often feel a sense of hope. There are many reasons to feel hopeful.

• Cancer treatment can be successful. Millions of people who have had cancer are alive today.
• People with cancer can lead active lives, even during treatment.
• Your chances of living withand living beyondcancer are better now than they have ever been before. People often live for many years after their cancer treatment is over.

Some doctors think that hope may help your body deal with cancer. Scientists are looking at the question of whether a hopeful outlook and positive attitude helps people feel better.

Here are some ways you can build your sense of hope:

• Plan your days as you have always done.
• Dont limit the things you like to do just because you have cancer.
• Look for reasons to hope.

You may find hope in nature, or your religious or spiritual beliefs. Or you may find hope in stories (such as the ones in this book) about people with cancer who are leading active lives.

However long the night, the dawn will break.

Hausa (African) Proverb

When you were first diagnosed, you may have had trouble believing or accepting the fact that you have cancer. This is called denial. It can be helpful because it can give you time to adjust to your diagnosis. Denial can also give you time to feel hopeful and better about the future.

Sometimes, denial is a serious problem. If it lasts too long, it can keep you from getting the treatment you need. It can also be a problem when other people deny that you have cancer, even after you have accepted it.

The good news is that most people (those with cancer as well as those they love and care about) work through denial. Usually by the time treatment begins, most people accept the fact that they have cancer.

Once you accept that you have cancer, you may feel angry and scared.

Its normal to ask Why me? and be angry at:

• The cancer
• Your health care providers
• Your healthy friends and loved ones

And if youre religious, you might even be angry with God.

Anger sometimes comes from feelings that are hard to showsuch as fear, panic, frustration, anxiety, or helplessness. If you feel angry, dont pretend that everything is okay. Talk with your family and friends about it. Most of the time, talking will help you feel a lot better. (See )

Its scary to hear that you have cancer. You may be afraid or worried about:

• Being in pain, either from the cancer or the treatment