Payton Lynch - Rise From the Ashes: Stories of Trauma, Resilience, and Growth from the Children of 9/11

Where were you on 9/11?

I was in second grade living in Pennsylvania at the time. We werent picked up early from school like many others, but I do remember arriving home to find my mom glued to the television. I was too young to understand what was going on, but I could recognize by the worry in my moms voice that it was bad.

Even living only two hours from New York City, I never knew anyone personally impacted by the attacks on 9/11. I had never even visited the city before that. In fact, I remember my dad driving us into New Jersey to see the now Twin Tower-less NYC skyline. You still couldnt get into the city, and the rubble was still smoking.

Do you know anyone who was personally impacted by 9/11?

While most of us know where we were when we heard the news, its less likely that you are in a community that was directly affected.

It would be years later until I would learn of anyone with a personal connection. I was on a date on the anniversary of 9/11 with my now husband, Jon Lynch. We had started dating in May of that year, so it was our first September together. What I thought was a casual date was actually Jon sharing his story.

His father, Robert Henry Lynch Jr., was the property manager of Two World Trade Center and was killed in the attacks. I was grateful to be seated in the dimly lit Bonefish Grill restaurant when he shared this story because it was difficult to remain stoic. As a child with two living parents, I couldnt imagine losing a parent not to mention losing them in one of the most public, tragic, and violent losses in American history.

I couldnt understand how this man had lived through such trauma in his childhood and could turn into such a kind, compassionate adult. The odds did not seem in his favor. And yet, here he was, leading a successful and joyful life, despite, and maybe because of, the adversity he faced.

Seven years after that 9/11 dinner date, we are happily married. The year 2020 brought many challenges for us. We were experiencing infertility and the loss of a job, two grandparents, and life as we knew it in less than a year. In addition to our personal challenges, 2020 was also the year of the COVID-19 pandemic.

The pandemic is set to go down in the history books as arguably the most devastating and defining moment of this century. In fact, many have described the COVID-19 pandemic as the turning point from a post9/11 world to a postCOVID-19 world. Both events shaped the nation, if not the entire world, and through them, protocols and standards have been set.

As weve lived through the challenges of 2020, Ive seen my husband, Jon, walk through this season with a grateful and hopeful heart. For as long as Ive known him, he has adapted through every challenge, and this was no exception.

I used to not be able to figure it out. Why does Jon respond so positively to adversity while I seem to struggle? While Jon is not defined by the tragedy of 9/11, he is certainly shaped by it. Experiencing the trauma of very publicly losing his father has brought immeasurable heartache. However, years later, those challenges have manifested into something else.

I originally thought Jons resiliency was an anomaly, but as I researched and learned more about others who had a front-row seat to the tragedy that defined a nation, I found that my husband was not alone. In fact, many children who lost a parent on 9/11 are thriving despite their trauma. In my research, I have found that some analysts believe that children who experience trauma in their childhood may have better coping mechanisms than children who dont. This includes Christina Vroman, a mental health counselor who states that Many individuals who experience a traumatic event endorse positive outcomes such as a newfound appreciation of life, spiritual renewal, and personal growth. (Vroman 2018).

9/11 Surviving Children bring a unique perspective to the mosaic of stories that make up all of those impacted that day. Its a mosaic theyd rather not be a part of, but the breadth of their experiences brings color to the human condition. The impact that their grief has had on their growth has been under-represented in the 9/11 narrative for too long. As we pull back the curtain within these interviews, thats all about to change.

Many of the 9/11 Surviving Children have turned trauma to triumph in their adult years. Theyve grown up in the shadow of 9/11, and now theyre adults, leaving their mark on the world. This isnt just true of 9/11 Surviving Children. Ive also had the opportunity to speak with counselors of children who experienced other tragedies, such as the mass shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School. Many of those children are also experiencing growth after their trauma and contributing to their communities in incredible ways.