Mark Batterson - Praying Circles Around the Lives of Your Children

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely
so that you do not forget the things your
eyes have seen or let them fade from your
heart as long as you live. Teach them to your
children and to their children after them.

D EUTERONOMY 4:9

I want to be famous in my home.

That is the deepest desire of my heart and the greatest challenge of my life. Parenting our three children is far more difficultand far more importantthan pastoring thousands of people. Compared to parenting, every other challenge is childs play. Being a mom or dad is our single greatest privilege. And while Ive never met a mom or dad who disagrees with me on that point, its easy to end up with inverted priorities. But at the end of the day, I want those who know me best to respect me most. Thats my family. And thats my definition of success. Of course, its much easier said than done.

During a recent parenting slump, I facetiously said to my wife, Lora, I think well finally figure out this parenting thing the same day our kids leave home! The truth is, well never figure it out because children are moving targets. Just when you think you have them pegged, they become toddlers or teenagers or twentysomethings, and youre right back to square one. Ive come to the conclusion that parenting is not a puzzle to be solved. Parenting is more like a roller coaster you ride for eighteen years with no exit. The relational corkscrews and emotional inversions result in exhilarating highs and nauseating lows. So my advice is simple: buckle up, learn a few lessons along the way, and enjoy the ride.

You will make more mistakes than you care to remember, especially with the guinea pigs we call firstborns. But no matter how many things you get wrong, there is one thing you must get rightand that one thing makes all the difference in the world:

Make sure the heavenly Father hears about your kids every day!

Right at the outset, let me give you some bad news, some good news, and some great news about parenting and praying for your children.

The bad news first: youll feel like a failure at the end of many, if not most, days.

There are days you need to take a mulligan. Go to bed, get up the next morning, and start over. Theres nothing like a good nights sleep to help you hit the reset button. I realize that isnt a luxury you have if you have a newborn baby, but the same baby you have a tough time getting to sleep will one day be difficult to wake up because they missed curfew the night before. My advice? Take a short nap as often as you can.

Ive already revealed my definition of success: I want those who know me best to respect me most. Thats the dream. But the reality is that I often feel like a complete failure as a father. Some days I even feel like a fraud. Its usually those moments when one of our mini-mes begins to mimic something I dont like about myself. Its a sobering thing when you say, Dont take that tone with me and then realize its the same exact tone you take with them.

Having children is like looking in the mirror on a really bad hair day or looking at old pictures from a fashion season youd like to forget. Kids keep us humble! Just when you think theyve mastered the art of Emily Post etiquette, theyll mortify you by making a passing comment or passing gas at the most inopportune time. Of course, they learned this from you as well. In the infamous words of John Wilmot, Before I got married, I had six theories about raising children; now I have six children and no theories. Nothing keeps you on your knees or on your toes like parenting.

My parenting ineptitude is epitomized by one shining moment when our oldest son, Parker, was a toddler. He had a fitful night full of tears, and I couldnt understand why. Then he crawled into our room in the middle of the night. I was too tired to take him back to his bed, so I reached down to pull him into ours. Thats when I realized why he had been cryinghis bare butt was the tip-off that I had forgotten to put a diaper on him when I put him to bed.

Its amazing that our kids even survive our parenting, isnt it?