Jennifer S. Holland - Unlikely Friendships

For Kate, Will, Elliott, and Jasper. And for Mom, of course.

Copyright 2011 by Jennifer S. Holland
Design copyright by Workman Publishing

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproducedmechanically, electronically, or by any other means, including photocopyingwithout written permission of the publisher. Published simultaneously in Canada by Thomas Allen & Son Limited.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

eISBN 9780761165316

Design by Raquel Jaramillo

Photo credits: COVER: CNImaging/Photoshot. INTERIOR: , Jennifer Hayes.

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47 REMARKABLE STORIES from the ANIMAL KINGDOM

by
JENNIFER S. HOLLAND

Workman Publishing, New York

If two lie together, then they have warmth; but how can one be warm alone?
Ecclesiastes 4:11

A lion cub and a French bulldog share a drink together at Twycross Zoo in the U.K.

MY HUSBAND JOHNS FIRST BEST FRIEND WAS A RACCOON. When a stray cat dropped the tiny fur ball into a neigh-bors boot, ten-year-old John became the creatures caretaker, cupping it in the palms of his hands, dripping milk into its mouth with an eyedropper, and tucking it into a blanketed box at night, with a ticking clock to mimic a mothers heartbeat. John named the animal Bandit, and the raccoon grew up following him every-whereas he left for school, to the dinner table, even into the shower. Bandit sat on Johns shoulder, shirt collar in its tiny grip and face into the wind, as the pair whizzed down the street on Johns bike. And the raccoon slept curled up on Johns pillow, cooing its animal dreams softly in the childs ear. No word but friendship could describe the bond shared by boy and raccoon.

It isnt unusual for human beings to connect with other animals. Well over half of all U.S. households keep pets, spending more than $40 billion a year on their welfare. Studies show that encounters with pets can lower blood pressure, ease depression, and soothe the mental and physical pain of growing oldjust a few of the countless ways animals enrich our lives.

Less common than a humanpet connection, and at first glance more surprising, is a bond between members of two different nonhuman species: a dog and a donkey, a cat and a bird, a sheep and an elephant. The phenomenon is most often reported in captive animals, in part because we simply catch them in the act more often. But its also because, notes biologist and primate specialist Barbara King of the College of William & Mary, thats where constraints are relaxed, where the animals arent fighting for their basic needswhich allows their emotional energy to flow elsewhere. Of course, there are cases of cross-species bonds in the wild, as well. Most important, King says, we know animals, under whatever circumstances, have that capacity.

Not all scientists are comfortable using a term like friendship when referring to nurturing or protective animal relations. For many years, animals were to be described as machines, and students of animal behavior were to develop a terminology devoid of human connotations, wrote primatologist Frans de Waal in The Age of Empathy. He himself has been criticized for attributing human traits to animals by biologists who believe anthropomorphic anecdotes have no place in science.

Even those less averse to associating people-based ideas with nonpeople say we dont know how much awareness exists between friends regarding their behavior. But behaviorists argue that declaring that there is none at all leans too far the other way. The famed primatologist Jane Goodall, who has described her own relationship with wild chimpanzees as friendships, said in a recent interview with me for National Geographic, You cannot share your life in any meaningful way with an animal and not realize they have different personalities. Are their capabilities and emotions similar to ours? Absolutely.

On a Darwinian note, evolutionary biologist Marc Bekoff of the University of Colorado, who has written extensively on animal sentience, puts it like this: Evolutionary continuitya concept that came from Charles Darwinstresses that there are differences in degrees rather than in kind between humans and other animals. That applies to emotions. We share many bodily systems, including the limbic system, where emotions are rooted. So if we have joy or sorrow, they have it, too. It isnt the same joy or the same sorrow. But the differences are shades of gray, not black versus white. Nurturing feels good to us, Bekoff says, so why wouldnt it feel good across species?

Feeling good is what this book is about. These stories represent just a small sample of the unexpected animal pairings that people have reported around the world. Dogs, not surprisingly, feature prominently: One dog mothers a baby squirrel, another parades around with chicks on his back, a third buddies up with an elephant, for example. But I have sought out a mix of species to reveal the wide reach of this phenomenon. I describe the unions as friendships, knowing that we cant truly explain what emotional strings bind our nonhuman kin but assuming that there is some parallel to our experiences. To me, friendship is as simple as seeking comfort or companionship from another to improve ones own life experience. Even if friendship is had only briefly, it is a plus. And in all of the cases that follow, the animals involved are arguably better offmore confident, physically stronger, in higher spiritsafter finding each other than they were before.

Though my focus is on pairs of nonhuman animals, during my research I stumbled across many extraordinary stories about people bonding with other species. Thats a subject for another book, but I picked a couple of favorites to include here in the mix.

Why do unlike creatures get together? Often biologists can point to an obvious benefit to one or both animals related to spotting predators, keeping parasites at bay, staying warm, finding food. Scientists label such relationships with terms like commensalism or mutualism. This book is concerned with cases that are a little less tidy. Some involve an animal taking a parental or protective role toward another, probably instinctively. Others have no obvious explanation. Perhaps the need for a good friend is not just a human thing after all.

What is human is to experience the awwwww factor of an ape hugging a kitten or a puppy nuzzling a pig. We are built to melt over soft, cuddly things (its one reason we can endure the stress of parenting a newborn). But the appeal goes deeper, Barbara King says: I believe people crave examples not just of cuteness, and not just of tolerancebut of true compassion and sharing. These stories help us get in touch with the best in ourselves.