This book would not be possible without the invaluable assistance of many dedicated students, including Kaitlin Andrewjeski and Raven Cloud. Of course, I am also grateful for the support of my institution, the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, for its unwavering support of my career goals and areas of scholarly pursuit. Included in this group are Dr. Sara Jordan (Couple and Family Therapy Program Director), Dr. Alison Netski (Department Chair), and Dr. Sara Hunt (Assistant Dean) for their support of this program of research. It is a joy to go to work each day with these special women.
I am indebted to Mr. George Zimmar and the staff at Taylor & Francis for approaching Dr. Markie Twist and me with this opportunity to write this important text. Ms. Clare Ashworth, managing editor, served as a wonderful point person to ensure a quality project and has been supportive of the topics and writing style for this text, as well as assisting with navigating us through the publication process. A specific and very important thank you goes to Mrs. Kristi Sessions, who carefully edited the manuscript and offered substantive suggestions to expand and provide detailed content. She has offered both editorial support and emotional support in this process, and I am grateful for having a partner in crime in this endeavor. This book and the model have greatly benefited from her careful eye, her attention to detail, and her comprehensive and critical thinking of the material.
Personally, this book would not exist without the support of my friends and family. While I have many wonderful friends, specific to this text, thank you to Katie Matthews (who advised me on the proper use of Facebook to execute specific objectives), and Sheala Morrison and Brent Fladmo, for showing me how to maintain perspective and adopt new ones. I appreciate the time that my husband, Eric, affords me to stay up late and write in order to accomplish this project, and my son, Adam, for writing his own books alongside mine. I am grateful for this support of my career and look forward to an amazing new chapter as we manage technology together.
Personal and professional thanks go out to my (MLCT) colleague and friend Dr. Neil McArthur for his informing and innovative ideas regarding robot sex and digisexuality. Our dialogue around these technology-related practices has helped to shape my understanding of Couple and Family Technology (CFT) studies, which is reflected in my contributions regarding digisexuality in this text. Appreciation is also extended to my colleague and good friend Dr. Alex Iantaffi, whose support and encouragement of my work in the area of CFT studies lead to solid collaborations like co-editing a Special Issue on Sex and Technology for Sexual and Relationship Therapy: International Perspectives on Theory, Research and Practice . Gratitude is also extended to my friend Dr. Shayna S. Bassett, who, back in 2005, introduced and taught me how to use social media like Myspace and Facebook. As follow-up, a big thank you goes out to Rebecca Koonce, who several years later taught me how to actually use such social media well. Lastly, and most importantly, my deep gratitude goes out to my partner in life and love, Ryan B. Peterson, who works online, whom I met online, proposed to online, and live with online, and thankfully offline. Your experience with technology, and our experiences together as a couple and in our family/relational system, have opened my mind and heart up to the beauty and the benefits that technology has to offer, and have no doubt shaped my view of technology and how I write about it for the bettermeaning in a more balanced and positive manner.
One
Couples, Families, and Technology
Its Facebook-official. The Internet and new technologies are in a relationshipwith us. As heavy consumers of technology, we are tied to devices with an Internet connectivity nearly continuously. We check our emails in the morning, before bed, and an average of 15 times per day and ten times that if you are a millennial (Social Media Week, 2016). We set up alerts to notify us of any activities or incoming information so that we may be advised of any activities at a moments notice. We can connect to others an ocean away or gain information about a topic that we could not possibly have accessed a decade ago. We rely on technology to help us more effectively move through the world, increase our social capital, gain information, socialize, and be entertained (Filipovic, 2013).
With these advances come some unintended (or unacknowledged) consequences. The ability we possess via these technologies to access others also provides a mechanism through which we, too, can be accessed. For example, we may be accessed at home and off-hours by those with whom we only have connections via work and career. Former partners, peers, and friends can make a connection to us or simply obtain updates on our daily life through quickly typing names into search engines. It is a way of staying connected without connecting. Further, the unintended consequences may have a substantial impact on others around us. The advances in technology are too fast and too numerous for anyone to keep up with all of them and their effects. By the time we identify how relationships are affected by these technologies, the technology we have figured out has been replaced by a new trend with its own set of implications and consequences.
Couples and families/relational systems who are living in todays world with technology as a prominent part in their organization of tasks and method of communication need to roll back the lens on what specific devices, software, and applications have contributed to the function (or dysfunction) in their relationships. Instead, we should evaluate how factors such as access, affordability, accommodation, and acceptability advance or interfere with a relationships basic structure and functions. How, for example, does being accessible to anyone 24 hours a day and seven days a week affect how we communicate with those in our own home? How does the affordability and acceptability of having phones play into a parents decision to gift a phone (and accessibility) to a child? How do we set rules to maintain the benefits of having these technologies in our lives, but limit what we may view as potential negatives?
With data from fields such as information technologies, education, sociology, psychology, biology, family studies, and psychotherapy, we are developing a rich library from which to develop appropriate adaptive responses to these questions. Family studies scholars are piecing together the circumstances in which the Internet can be used to augment relationships, as well as where the Internet may be contributing to problematic outcomes. In some cases, this distinction is easy to make. For example, cases of pathological Internet use, addiction, or even Internet infidelity are commonly lumped into the negative outcomes category. It may be more difficult in other cases to quantify the net impact on our relationships without consideration of each couples or familys unique characteristics and how they interact with technology and new media. For example, talking to an individual of a differing or similar gender via Face-book messaging may be perfectly permissible in one couples relationship, but constitute a serious betrayal in another.
Technology is infused in the everyday experience for nearly half of the worlds population. Of 7.4 billion people in the world, 50% (3.7 billion) indicated they are Internet users and 66% (or 4.92 billion) are identified as unique mobile phone users. This number represents a growth of 10% in Internet users and an increase of 21% in social media users over the last year alone (Hootsuites, 2017). Another 2.5 billion identify themselves as users of social media. Estimates of technological saturation in the population range anywhere from 30 to 99%, depending on where you are on the globe. For example, 88% of the population in North America are Internet users; this is in stark contrast to Africa or South Asia, where 29% and 33% of the population, respectively, are Internet users (Hootsuites, 2017). The United Arab Emirates has the highest penetration of Internet users at 99% and North Korea the lowest at 0.1% (Hootsuites, 2017). The difference in Internet usage between 11 developed countries (such as the United States, Canada, European countries, and developed Asian countries) and emerging countries is 33% (Greenwood, Perrin, & Duggan, 2016). Of those who use the Internet in developed countries, 75% report accessing the Internet on a daily basis (Poushter, Bishop, & Chwe, 2018). Most frequently, global Internet users are using cellphones to text message, take photos and videos, access social media sites, get information, and make payments (Poushter et al., 2018).