Julian Barnes - Pulse

Copyright Julian Barnes 2011

East Wind, Trespass, The Limner and Complicity first appeared in The New Yorker; At Phil and Joannas 1: 60/40 and Sleeping with John Updike in the Guardian; At Phil and Joannas 2: Marmalade in the Sunday Times; Harmony in Granta. Marriage Lines began as a radio commission for Alan Howards voice in 2007, and was later published by Granta.

THE PREVIOUS NOVEMBER, a row of wooden beach huts, their paintwork lifted and flaked by the hard east wind, had burnt to the ground. The fire brigade came from twelve miles away, and had nothing to do by the time it arrived. Yobs on Rampage, the local paper decided; though no culprit was ever found. An architect from a more fashionable part of the coastline told the regional TV news that the huts were part of the towns social heritage, and must be rebuilt. The council announced that it would consider all options, but since then had done nothing.

Vernon had moved to the town only a few months before, and had no feelings about the beach huts. If anything, their disappearance improved the view from The Right Plaice, where he sometimes had lunch. From a window table he now looked out across a strip of concrete to damp shingle, a bored sky and a lifeless sea. That was the east coast: for months on end you got bits of bad weather and lots of no weather. This was fine by him: hed moved here to have no weather in his life.

You are done?

He didnt look up at the waitress. All the way from the Urals, he said, still gazing at the long, flat sea.

Pardon?

Nothing between here and the Urals. Thats where the wind comes from. Nothing to stop it. Straight across all those countries. Cold enough to freeze your knob off, he might have added in other circumstances.

Oorals, she repeated. As he caught the accent, he looked up at her. A broad face, streaked hair, chunky body, and not doing any waitressy number in hope of a bigger tip. Must be one of those Eastern Europeans who were all over the country nowadays. Building trade, pubs and restaurants, fruit picking. Came over here in vans and coaches, lived in rabbit warrens, made themselves a bit of money. Some stayed, some went home. Vernon didnt mind one way or the other. Thats what he found more often than not these days: he didnt mind one way or the other.

Are you from one of them?

One of what?

One of those countries. Between here and the Urals.

Oorals. Yes, perhaps.

That was an odd answer, he thought. Or maybe her sense of geography wasnt so strong.

Fancy a swim?

A swim?

Yes, you know. Swim. Splash splash, front crawl, breast stroke.

No swim.

Fine, he said. He hadnt meant it anyway. Bill, please.

As he waited, he looked back across the concrete to the damp shingle. A beach hut had recently sold for twenty grand. Or was it thirty? Somewhere down on the south coast. Spiralling house prices, the market going mad: thats what the papers said. Not that it touched this part of the country, or the property he dealt in. The market had bottomed out here long ago, the graph as horizontal as the sea. Old people died, you sold their flats and houses to people who in their turn would get old in them and then die. That was a lot of his trade. The town wasnt fashionable, never had been: Londoners carried on up the A12 to somewhere pricier. Fine by him. Hed lived in London all his life until the divorce. Now he had a quiet job, a rented flat, and saw the kids every other weekend. When they got older, theyd probably be bored with this place and start acting the little snobs. But for the moment they liked the sea, throwing pebbles into it, eating chips.

When she brought the bill, he said, We could run away together and live in a beach hut.

I do not think, she replied, shaking her head, as if she assumed he meant it. Oh well, the old English sense of humour, takes a while for people to get used to it.

He had a few rentals to attend to changes of tenancy, redecoration, damp problems and then a sale up the coast, so he didnt return to The Right Plaice for a few weeks. He ate his haddock and mushies, and read the paper. There was some town in Lincolnshire which was suddenly half Polish thered been so many immigrants. Nowadays, more Catholics went to church on Sundays than Anglicans, they were saying, what with all these Eastern Europeans. He didnt mind one way or the other. Actually, he liked the Poles hed met brickies, plasterers, electricians. Good workers, well trained, did what they said, trustworthy. It was time the good old British building trade had a kick up the arse, Vernon thought.

The sun was out that day, slanting low across the sea, annoying his eyes. Late March, and bits of spring were getting even to this part of the coast.

How about that swim, then? he asked as she brought the bill.

Oh no. No swim.

Im guessing you might be Polish.

My name is Andrea, she replied.

Not that I mind whether youre Polish or not.

I do not also.

The thing was, hed never been much good at flirting; never quite said the right thing. And since the divorce, hed got worse at it, if that was possible, because his heart wasnt in it. Where was his heart? Question for another day. Todays subject: flirting. He knew all too well the look in a womans eye when you didnt get it right. Wheres he coming from, the look said. Anyway, it took two to flirt. And maybe he was getting too old for it. Thirty-seven, father of two, Gary (8) and Melanie (5). Thats how the papers would put it if he was washed up on the coast some morning.

Im an estate agent, he said. That was another line which often hampered flirting.

What is this?

I sell houses. And flats. And we do rentals. Rooms, flats, houses.

Is it interesting?

Its a living.

We all need living.

He suddenly thought: no, you cant flirt either. Maybe you can flirt in your own language, but you cant do it in English, so were even. He also thought: she looks sturdy. Maybe I need someone sturdy. She might be my age, for all I know. Not that he minded one way or the other. He wasnt going to ask her out.

He asked her out. There wasnt much choice of out in this town. One cinema, a few pubs, and the couple of other restaurants where she didnt work. Apart from that, there was bingo for the old people whose flats he would sell after they were dead, and a club where some half-hearted goths loitered. Kids drove into Colchester on a Friday night and bought enough drugs to see them through the weekend. No wonder they burnt down the beach huts.

He liked her at first for what she wasnt. She wasnt flirty, she wasnt gabby, she wasnt pushy. She didnt mind that he was an estate agent, or that he was divorced with two kids. Other women had taken a quick look and said: no. He reckoned women were more attracted to men who were still in a marriage, however fucked up it was, than to ones picking up the pieces afterwards. Not surprising really. But Andrea didnt mind all that. Didnt ask questions much. Didnt answer them either, for that matter. The first time they kissed, he thought of asking if she was really Polish, but then he forgot.

He suggested his place, but she refused. She said shed come next time. He spent an anxious few days wondering what it would be like to go to bed with someone different after so long. He drove fifteen miles up the coast to buy condoms where no one knew him. Not that he was ashamed, or embarrassed; just didnt want anyone knowing, or guessing, his business.

This is a nice apartment.