JIMMY LUNTZ had never been to war, but this was the sensation, he was sure of that eighteen guys in a room, Rob, the director, sending them out eighteen guys shoulder to shoulder, moving out on the orders of their leader to do what theyve been training day and night to do. Waiting silently in darkness behind the heavy curtain while on the other side of it the MC tells a stale joke, and thenTHE ALHAMBRA CALIFORNIA BEACHCOMBER CHORDSMEN!and they were smiling at hot lights, doing their two numbers.
Luntz was one of four leads. On Firefly he thought they did pretty well. Their vowels matched, they went easy on the consonants, and Luntz knew he, at least, was lit up and smiling, with plenty of body language. On If We Cant Be the Same Old Sweethearts they caught the wave. Uniformity, resonance, expression of pathos, everything Rob had ever asked for. Theyd never done it so well. Right face, down the steps, and into the convention centers basement,
where once again they arranged themselves in ranks, this time to pose for souvenir pictures.
Even if we come in twentieth out of twenty, Rob told them afterward, while they were changing out of their gear, the white tuxedos and checkered vests and checkered bow ties, were really coming in twentieth out of a hundred, right? Because remember, guys, one hundred outfits tried to get to this competition, and only twenty made it all the way here to Bakersfield. Dont forget that. Were out of a hundred, not twenty. Remember that, okay? You got a bit of an impression Rob didnt think theyd done too well.
Almost noon. Luntz didnt bother changing into street clothes. He grabbed his gym bag, promised to meet the others back at the Best Value Inn, and hurried upstairs still wearing the getup. He felt the itch to make a bet. Felt lucky. He had a Santa Anita sheet folded up in the pocket of his blinding white tux. They started running at twelve-thirty. Find a pay phone and give somebody a jingle.
On his way out through the lobby he saw theyd already posted the judgments. The Alhambra Chordsmen ranked seventeenth out of twenty. But, come on, that was really seventeenth out of a hundred, right?
All right fine. Theyd tanked. But Luntz still had that lucky feeling. A shave, a haircut, a tuxedo. He was practically Monte Carlo.
He headed out through the big glass doors, and theres old Gambol standing just outside the entrance. Checking
the comings and goings. A tall, sad man in expensive slacks and shoes, camel-hair sports coat, one of those white straw hats that senior-citizen golfers wear. A very large head.
So hey, Gambol said, you are in a barbershop chorus.
What are you doing here?
I came here to see you.
No, but really.
Really. Believe it.
All the way to Bakersfield?
That lucky feeling. It had let him down before.
Im parked over here, Gambol said.
Gambol was driving a copper-colored Cadillac Brougham with soft white leather seats. Theres a button on the side of the seat, he said, to adjust it how you want.
People will be missing me, Luntz said. Ive got a ride back down to LA. Its all arranged.
Call somebody.
Good, sure just find a pay phone, and Ill hop out.
Gambol handed him a cell phone. Nobodys hopping anywhere.
Luntz patted his pockets, found his notebook, spread it on his knee, punched buttons with his thumb. He got Robs voice mail and said, Hey, Im all set. I got a lift, a lift back down to Alhambra. He thought a second. This is Jimmy. What else? Luntz. What else? Nothing. Good deal. Ill see you Tuesday. Practice is Tuesday, right? Yeah. Tuesday.
He handed back the phone, and Gambol put it in the pocket of his fancy Italian sports coat.
Luntz said, Okay if I smoke?
Sure. In your car. But not in my car.
Gambol drove with one hand on the wheel and one long arm reaching into the back seat, going through Luntzs gym bag. Whats this?
Protection.
From what? Grizzly bears? He reached across Luntzs lap and shoved it in the glove compartment. That is one big gun.
Luntz opened the compartment. Shut that thing, goddamn it.
Luntz shut it.
You want protection? Pay your debts. Thats the best protection.
I agree completely, Luntz said, and can I tell you about an uncle of mine? I have an appointment to see him this afternoon.
A rich uncle.
Coincidentally, yes. He just moved out from the coast. Made a pile in the garbage business. The guy gets a new Mercedes every year. Just moved to Bakersfield. Last time I saw him he was still living in La Mirada. The Garbage King of La Mirada. Told me anytime I needed money to
get in touch. We had lunch at the Outback Steakhouse in La Mirada. Wow, do they deliver. Choice cuts as thick as your arm. You ever try the Outback?
Not lately.
So, in other words, let me give this guy a call before we get too far out of town.
In other words, you cant make a payment.
Yes, definitely, yes, Luntz said, I can make a payment. Just let me use your phone and work a little magic.
Gambol behaved as if he hadnt heard.
Come on. The guy drives a Mercedes. Let me go see him.
Fucking bullshit. Your uncle.
Okay. Hes Shellys uncle. But hes real.
Is Shelly real?
Shes yeah. Shelly? I used to live with her.
The uncle of some bitch you used to live with.
Give me a chance, friend. A chance to work my magic.
Youre working it now. It aint working.
Look, man, look, Luntz said, lets call Juarez. Let me talk to the man himself.
Juarez is not a talker.
Come on. Dont we know each other? Whats the problem?
Gambol said, My brother just died.
What?
He died exactly a week ago.
Luntz knew nothing about any brother. How do you
reason with someone who throws something like that into the conversation?
They were heading north. Bakersfield stank of oil and natural gas. In the most unlikely places, in the middle of a shopping mall or next to one of those fancy new churches, all glass and swooping curves, youd see oil rigs with their heads going up and down.
Used to fish up here with my brother, Gambol said, somewhere around here anyway. On the Feather River.
Luntz unclasped his hands from each other and looked at them. What?
Once, to be exact. We went fishing one time. We shouldve done it more.
The road was a four-lane, but not an interstate. The clock on the dash said 4:00 p.m.
Where are we?
Were just driving around, Gambol said. Why? You need to be someplace?
Luntz placed his hands on his knees and sat up straight. Where are we going?
On this kind of trip, you dont want to ask where it ends.
Luntz closed his eyes.
When he opened them he saw a crowd of bikers on Harleys coming toward them and sweeping past.
Gambol said, See that? Half those bikies had Oregon plates. I think theres a convention in Oakland or someplace like that. Guess what? Ive never been on a motorcycle.
Shit, Luntz said.
What?
Nothing. Those bikers. Shit, he said, the Feather River. Is there a Feather River Tavern or something?
The rivers not anywhere around here. Its more north. Guess what? Youll never get me on a Harley.
Yeah?
Helmet or not. What good is a helmet?
The Feather fucking River, Luntz said.
Standing at the pay phone, Jimmy Luntz punched a nine and a one and stopped. He couldnt hear the dial tone. His ears still rang. That old Colt revolver made a bang that slapped you silly.
He dropped the receiver and let it dangle a few seconds. He shook his head and wiped both hands across the thighs of his slacks. He jabbed at the one again as he put the phone to his head. Some woman said, Palo County Sheriffs Department. What is your emergency?