Jed Talks #1
Essays, Teachings, Rants & Frivolous Frivolity
2nd Edition
Jed McKenna
Print ISBN: 978-0-9714352-8-5
E-Book ISBN: 978-0-9978797-3-5
Copyright 2017 Wisefool Press. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system without written permission of the author or publisher, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review.
No problem can withstand the assault of sustained thinking.
Voltaire
Toe Jam
How old would you be if you didnt know how old you are?
Satchel Paige
Jed and Douglas sit facing each other. Douglas, 30, sits cross-legged and barefoot. We join them in mid-conversation.
Douglas
But Im a good person. I dont hurt anyone, I give money to charity, I go to church. Doesnt that count for anything?
Jed
Thats a good question for you to pursue using the process of spiritual autolysis, Id say. A good starting point.
Douglas
What? Whether being a good person should count for something?
Jed
Whether any thing counts for anything. Ask yourself what you mean by that. Count for what? Count with whom? What is this entity or organization that you think is keeping track of you? Who are you performing for? Who is your audience?
Douglas
Are you asking me?
Jed
Im suggesting you ask yourself.
Douglas
God? Karma? I dont know.
Jed
I know you dont know, but you dont know you dont know. This is an example of a shadow demon. You are engulfed in shadows and your mind plays tricks on you. You see vague shapes and your mind interprets them as real things. Thats what the spiritual autolysis process is for, to light up these dark areas of your universe where you think you see something lurking, and seeing clearly that theres nothing there, which, by the way, there never is.
Douglas
How does that help?
Jed
Lighting up your interior universe is Are you really gonna make me say it?
Douglas
Say what? Oh, enlightening? Oh yeah, okay, sorry, I get it. So what do I do? I just start writing? Or I write out a question and try to answer it or something?
Jed
You do it however you do it, however you can, written or verbal, whatever works for you. Give it some context and subtext. Write as if corresponding with the past you or your future child. Write it out like a sermon or a speech. Write to me or Krishna or your dead mother, whatever, as long as it helps you achieve focus.
Douglas
So, like journaling?
Jed
If I were suggesting that you try to get in touch with your feelings, I might suggest journaling, but I dont give a shit about your feelings and neither should you. Im suggesting you bring your brain fully online and start making it work for you. Your ability to think is your number one asset and you dont even know how to do it. No offense, not your fault. Your only hope in waking up is your ability to think, not your ability to explore your feelings or devote yourself to a guru or exhibit compassion. You have to think clearly and coldly, and no else can do it for you. Theres a million ways to make believe youre awake, and you can convince others too because what they hell do they know?, but theres only one way out of the sleeping dreamstate and thats with the power of the focused mind.
Douglas
You make it sound like a war.
Jed
Not a war, the war. The internal conflict between dark and light is the only real war there is. Everything else is just puppets and shadowplay. Your eyes are shut tight so you see the world as the soft blur of light and dark visible through closed eyelids. You cant see anything clearly so you can only guess whats out there. Its not wrong or evil, its just the way life is with closed eyes. But now were talking about going inside and lighting the place up, destroying darkness with light, destroying ignorance with clear seeing. Look everywhere, see everything, believe nothing. It can be done, but its a process. Naturally, it will result in your becoming a totally different being in a totally different world.
Douglas
Enlightened.
Jed
We cant avoid saying so. Another way to say it is that, by coming to me, you are asking me to cut your head off, but I cant do that for you. Only you can do it.
Douglas
And what if I dont want to cut my head off?
Jed
Then dont. But in that case, youre talking to the exact wrong person. I am the teacher of self-decapitation. Its all I got.
Douglas
They say its good to specialize.
Jed
They are wise.
Douglas
Still, Im not sure this is what Im looking for.
Jed
Im sure its not, but this is what youve found. Pay attention to things like that.
Douglas
Are you saying?
Jed
Im saying you can learn to open your eyes and see for yourself because whatever you ask, thats always my answer. Ask me the time, its time to open your eyes.
Douglas
And spiritual autolysis will do that?
Jed
Thinking will do that, but you have to begin by developing focus and igniting intent. Thats what the writing process will help with. And then the focus and intent will help intensify the autolysis and theyll keep feeding each other and the next thing you know, youre actually taking an actual step, and the journey of awakening is never anything more than taking the next step. Further.
Douglas
And thats what you think I should do?
Jed
No, I think you should go have a family and be a Christian or a Buddhist or something safe and forget all about this waking up stuff. Its life-denying. Whats the point of that?
Douglas
But youre an enlightenment teacher.
Jed
Yeah, kind of, but what if I was a jump-on-a-grenade teacher? It doesnt mean I think everyone should want to go around jumping on grenades all the time. Jumping on grenades is a very limited field of endeavor based on a very specific set of circumstances that few people will ever need to even contemplate. At least, I hope not. It would be a pretty messed up world if everyone needed a jump-on-a-grenade teacher.
Douglas
Ive never met a teacher like you. Youre a very strange person.
Jed
Ha! You think Im strange? You should see my toes.
Douglas
Why, are your toes strange?
Jed
All toes are strange. Dont get me started. Never mind, sorry I mentioned it. Just my own little bugaboo. We all have our pet peeves, I guess. Some people have a thing about ending world hunger or creating world peace, some people have a thing about toes. Really, dont get me started.
Douglas
Okay.
Jed
I mean, seriously though, what the hell are they? Shrunken little foot-fingers, right? They dont do shit, they look freaky, they hurt like hell when you stub them, theyre hard to maintain, and although mine are quite attractive, most peoples are totally disgusting.
Douglas
Okay, okay, Im sorry I asked.
Jed
Yours are disgusting. Look at those stupid things. Seriously, you never thought about toes? Maybe thats where you should start your autolysis. Get your head right about this whole toe thing. Toes? I mean, claws, okay, I can see that. At least they do something, right? Maybe help you climb or dig or defend yourself or something, but what do toes do? Nothing. They just sit there and look stupid. Oh, sorry, they curl. Wow, how great is that?
