Elayne Fluker - Get Over i Got It: How to Stop Playing Superwoman, Get Support, and Remember That Having It All Doesnt Mean Doing It All Alone

As a superwoman-in-recovery myself, Get Over I Got It was the book I needed all along. Elayne lays out a simple step-by-step pathway to discover how to ask for what you want, avoid burnout, and understand the value of surrounding yourself with a network of supportive women

Kelly Notaras, CEO of KN Literary Arts and
Author of The Book You Were Born to Write

Elayne Fluker is the real deal and truly a force of nature, and this raw and insightful book is a complete game changer every goal-oriented woman should read at least once.

Maya Penn, Award-winning
CEO and Eco-Entrepreneur

This is the book Ive been waiting for. Elayne Fluker taps into the core essence of female power to not only unlock our potential but to also know that we dont have to do it all alone. A must-read for women starting out or well within their career.

Stephanie Nadi Olson, Founder of We Are Rosie

Elayne inspires twenty-first-century superwomen in a new way, encouraging us to recognize that asking for, enlisting, and accepting support is one of the keys to living a life that is full.

Tai Beauchamp, Serial Entrepreneur and
Cofounder of Brown Girl Jane

Elayne lights the way with her wisdom-filled stories, encouragement, directives, and interviews with professionals. Read this bookand learn from the best!

Dr. Zoe Shaw, Psychotherapist and
Author of A Year of Self-Care

Elayne Fluker has hit the mark in Get Over I Got It by showing the strength of being vulnerable and calling in the support you require.

Barbara Biziou, Transformational Vision Coach
and Author of The Joy of Ritual

Reading Get Over I Got It is like having a friend in your head who is there to remind you that even greater things are possible when you are in it together! Elaynes book has my heartfelt recommendation!

Tyrona Heath, Director of Market Engagement
for The B2B Institute at LinkedIn

This book is written in the language that we, as unapologetically ambitious women, understand, and forces you to do the uncomfortable work necessary to be and, more importantly, feel successful.

Polina Hanin,
Principal at Aequitas Partners

Were all so tired and burned out by the old school mindset of hustle harder. Elayne nails the concept that rest and support is a source of strength, not weakness. A must-read for women of all ages and life stages.

Martine Resnick,
Cofounder of The Lola

Elayne peels back the layers and goes deep by sharing her personal experience, as well as those of other influential women whove benefited from seeking support, establishing boundaries, and taking off their capes to prioritize themselves.

Nadia Lopez, Educator and Founder
of Mott Hall Bridges Academy

As a recovering I got it addict, I greatly appreciate Elaynes perspective and challenge to step away from constantly trying to prove ourselves and to step into relationship, connection, and supporta necessary shift for women in order to live a healthy life.

Carissa Reiniger,
CEO of Silver Lining

2021 Elayne Fluker

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherexcept for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published by HarperCollins Leadership, an imprint of HarperCollins Focus LLC.

Any internet addresses, phone numbers, or company or product information printed in this book are offered as a resource and are not intended in any way to be or to imply an endorsement by HarperCollins Leadership, nor does HarperCollins Leadership vouch for the existence, content, or services of these sites, phone numbers, companies, or products beyond the life of this book.

ISBN 978-1-4002-1380-1 (eBook)

ISBN 978-1-4002-1379-5 (PBK)

Epub Edition March 2021 9781400213801

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021930827

Printed in the United States of America

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Please note that the endnotes in this ebook may contain hyperlinks to external websites as part of bibliographic citations. These hyperlinks have not been activated by the publisher, who cannot verify the accuracy of these links beyond the date of publication

For Annie B. and Luke

I know youve got it going on. I know, to everyone else, you appear as though youre unstoppable, like you need no one, like you have it all together. Youre a boss chick. Youre a leader. You run things. Youre the one people bet on when they need something done, and they need it done right. And you take great pride in knowing that, for them, betting on you is a freakin safe bet. You show up. You come all the way through. You do whatever it takes.

And whenever anyone has the gall to ask if you could use their help, your first response, without even thinking is, I got it! With a little attitude even, maybe a defiant hand held up that says Halt! and stops them in their tracks. Because, help? Why would you need their help? Youre Superwoman, right? Superwoman doesnt need anyones help.

Heres the thing, though, my sister in ambition: Superwoman. Isnt. Real. Okay? She is a fantasy, and your flawed pursuit of that perfection doesnt make you an admirable hero. More likely it leaves you feeling isolated, unsupported, stressed, and unhappy. Because what every super woman really needs is support, whether she admits it or not.

So, its time. Its time for you to get over what I call I Got It! Syndrome and learn how to truly accept support into your life. When you say the words, I got it! it may lead you to feel strong and accomplished in the moment, but in actuality, youre pausing all the possibilities and support that could come your way, and doing that actually keeps you small. I got it! cuts support off at the pass. It tells the Universe to keep it movin, when all it ever wants to do is show up for you.

And besides, even if you do have it when you say, I got it! do you really have to get it each and every single time? Do you have to carry all the groceries to the car by yourself? Or can the guy who works there, who is supposed to help you, give you a hand?

Do you have to take the kids to every single after-school activity? Or can you coordinate with another parent so you split the responsibilities of getting them where they need to be?

Do you have to work on that big project at the office by yourself into the wee hours of the morning, to the point where your body is trembling with exhaustion? Or can you accept the support of a colleague you trust and make this a team effort?

If you find yourself shaking your head side to side and saying, Yeah... no, I really got this, as you read this, I understand. You might not see support even if the word were stamped backward on your forehead and you were gazing at yourself in the mirror. Again, I understand. I understand, because Ive been you. Ive been the woman who wants to have it all and do it allat work, at home, in relationships, and everywhere else. Ive stood tall as the one who could shoulder the world, even if I could feel it weighing me down, or who fumbled through an opportunity just to prove to myself that I could do it by myself. In each case where my stubbornness and insecurities caused me to shun support, accepting that support would have made me stronger and wiser, and it would have taken me much further.