H. Norman Wright - When It Feels Like the Sky Is Falling: How to Find Hope in an Uncertain World

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS

EUGENE, OREGON

W hat is it like to live with the unexpected? What events qualify as unexpected? I will share a number of unexpected experiences I have had that perhaps you can identify with. Personally, I would have rather missed out on some of them. But they are part of my life, and some shaped who I became.

One such event happened in 1952. It was unexpected. And it was slight. At first just a gentle sway. Then it stopped and everything was still. Silence. All of a sudden there was a sharp jolt and continuous movement that increased to the point that the bed and other furniture moved back and forth and up and down. We were in the middle of a major earthquake. All of Los Angeles felt the tremors. Damage here was slight. But not in Tehachapi and Bakersfield, 120 miles north of ustremors there were intense. The ground shook, buildings crumbled, and lives were changed. It was totally unexpected.

Storms, earthquakes, tornados, accidentsthese happen just in the lives of othersor do they? To describe these types of events Ill use the word tremors , for it might be the best descriptive word to convey what we experience. The word evokes numerous images and thoughts. We dont use the word very often. For some its a negative image. It could be a warning that something is amiss or theres going to be a problem that needs attention.

Tremor its a word that doesnt denote stability, but just the opposite. What comes to mind is insecurity or shaking such as the ground does when an earthquake hits or it could be our hand as we age or when a physical disease begins to manifest itself. The dictionary describes it as involuntary shaking of the body or limbs, as from disease, fear, weakness, or excitement; a fit of trembling. Any tremulous or vibratory movement; vibration: tremors following an earthquake.

All too often there is no warning. One moment were stable and comfortable and the next we feel buffeted and overwhelmed. Some refer to this experience as having their life torn apart by a major storm. Others describe it as being blindsided.

Most people are exposed to at least one violent or life-threatening situation during the course of their lives. As people progress through the life cycle, they are also increasingly confronted with the deaths of close friends and relatives. Not everyone copes with these potentially disturbing events in the same way. Some people experience acute distress from which they are unable to recover. Others suffer less intensely and for a much shorter period of time. The more violent and unexpected, the more devastating.

None of us is immune to these events. Often they appear out of nowhere at the wrong time, usually when its most inconvenient. They disrupt our plans, and some leave devastation in their path. For some their experience is depicted in this way:

In those few moments of realization, your focus changes from the everyday, ordinary issues of life, to the traumatic, catastrophic occurrences that make everything else seem miniscule. Your focus has been changed from the mundane to the monumental. Your feelings have escalated from bland to ballistic in a heartbeat. And while your heart is pounding, you hold your breath, and realization begins to sink into your consciousness. Youve been blindsided and nothing will ever be the same again.

Welcome to the world of the unexpected.

Often with these events we enter into a fog of disbelief. No, this isnt happening, not to menot nownot to us. For some this fog is impenetrablea person cant make sense of this in their head.

Some of these events are like fires. They start small in some unobserved area. If we see the smoke and catch the fire early, we can do damage control and avoid disastrous results. But left unobserved or unnoticed, the results could be long lasting and devastating.

Like you, Ive experienced numerous tremors or events in my life. Some were slight and didnt affect my life, while others have been overwhelming and altered my life significantly. Each experience brought a mixture of responses and feelings, from upset, turmoil, and shock to a time of growth and change. Perhaps you will identify with some of these experiences.

In the early 1960s, I served on the staff of a church as a youth pastor and minister of education. Fresh out of seminary, I wasnt sure if I knew what to do. One of my first challenges revolved around the discovery that I would be serving more with the youth than with education. However, I made the adjustment and began to enjoy the ministry, and in time I saw some results. With 300 junior high, high school, and college students in my program, it was a busy time and full of unexpected events.

Each summer we took a group of high school students on an outreach or study outing. One year we took 25 of them to the High Sierras in Southern California, and for several days we camped in tents, hiked, fished, interacted, and studied. Nearby was a formidable, massive rock formationCrystal Cragover 1,000 feet high. At 10,364 feet, Crystal Crag is a dramatic and rugged mass of rock that is the recognizable landmark of the Mammoth Crest. The crag is a popular destination among mountaineers and climbers. The sheer wall was a challenge to even the most skilled climber.

But one morning two of the high school boys (one a recent graduate who was waiting to go into the navy) decided on their own to climb the face of this cliff. They left before others were awake and did not inform anyone of their plans. They probably knew we would have told them that the area was off-limits, since they were inexperienced and had no climbing gear. They walked the two miles to the base of the rock formation, made their way up the shale slide at the base of the rock, and proceeded to climb.

Its still unclear how they were able to scale the rock face given the lack of equipment and expertise, but they climbed for several hundred feet before Phil lost his handhold and plunged over 400 feet to his death. Every bone in his body was broken. His companion hung there watching in horror as his friend fell, but then he continued to climb until he was off the sheer wall and went for help. Hours later someone came to our camp and told us. There was a feeling of shockdisbeliefas we thought, This isnt true . A few minutes later, I watched a pack train walk by with Phils body encased in a body bag hanging over the back of a horse. I watched until they were out of sight and then went to find a phone and call our senior pastor. It became his task to inform Phils parents.

Did I know what to do at this time? Not really. Did I know what to say? No. Did I feel equipped to handle this event? Not at all. I had no preparation for anything like this. I think I felt like those in ministry in New York City following the 9/11 Twin Towers disaster. Most of them said, I dont know what to say or do. I dont feel equipped. Neither did I. It was my first encounter with a combination crisis and traumatic event.

Ill never forget that day. We all sat in small groups talking in hushed voices, feeling numb and stunned. We fixed dinner, and then, strangely enough, our group began to joke, cut up, and laugh for the next hour. Other adults around us were bothered by their response. However, I realized later that this was their way of taking a break from the heaviness of the crisis. It was a normal response, because adolescents tend to move in and out of their grief more than adults do.

So, what would you have said or done? Would you have known how to respond? How would you have made sense of this tragedy? How do you respond when youre blindsided?