Shaun Robinson - Exactly As I Am: Celebrated Women Share Candid Advice with Todays Girls on What It Takes to Believe in Yourself
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- Book:Exactly As I Am: Celebrated Women Share Candid Advice with Todays Girls on What It Takes to Believe in Yourself
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Actress Eva Mendes talks about how she persevered in the face of rejection: Surrounding myself with people who love and support me has been my key to success. Grammy-winning singer-songwriter Alicia Keys suggests that the answer to a healthy self-image lies in new definitions: We need more variety in how we depict beauty and define intelligencetheres so much more than what is often featured. Kelly Clarkson turns the tables on so-called imperfection: The flaws and vulnerability are what make people attractive. And Vanessa Williams suggests a way out of the trap of taking things personally: Next time someone rolls their eyes at you or says an unkind word about you, think about what they could be insecure about.
Through this rich tapestry of voices, women of all ages, races, ethnicities, and backgrounds explore how to stay grounded and develop positive self-esteem, something Robinson calls your ticket to freedom and making your dreams come true. They also discuss the importance of mentors and friends, being able to laugh at oneself, and giving back to others. The collected wisdom of shared experiences in Exactly As I Am is designed to give every girl and woman the opportunity to dream big, stay strong, and remain true to herself.
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This book is dedicated to all of the girls out there
big and smallwho have ever looked in the mirror
and thought, if that image were smaller, lighter, thinner,
bigger, straighter, taller, smarter, coolerlife would be oh,
so much better. May the next glance you take make you
feel beautiful and loved exactly as you are.
Chapter One
Y OU A RE W HO Y OU A RE
Beauty and Self-Acceptance
Chapter Two
Y OU A RE W ORTH I T
Grow Confidence
Chapter Three
Y OU A RE THE B OSS
Dream Big and See Beyond This Moment
Chapter Four
Y OU A RE D IFFERENT
Think for Yourself and Choose Friends Wisely
Chapter Five
Y OU A RE H UMAN
Manage Stress and Take Care of Yourself
Chapter Six
Y OU A RE IN C HARGE
Sex and Boys
Chapter Seven
Y OU A RE P ART O F S OMETHING B IGGER
Give Back and Take Responsibility
Chapter Eight
Y OU A RE Y OU
Remain True to Yourself
Throughout this journey, I have been extremely blessed to have had so many people help me realize this dream.
The two people who always told me I was perfect exactly as I amJoanne and Wylie, aka, Mom and Dad. You mean the world to me. You lift me up and carry me on the wings of your love. What a lucky girl I am! I would have handpicked you myself, but God did it for me. Now, this calls for a Coney Island breakfast!
My angelsGrandma Curry, Mama Ashie, Grandpa Robinson, Daddy Jimmy, Mama Nony, Papa, Grandma Ruth, Jacob, and Gloria. I see you in every rainbow, in every ray of sunlight, and in every twinkle of every star. I feel you in every warm breeze, every drop of rain, and every snowflake that touches my eyelids. You live in every beat of my heart.
My entire familyI send you love from across the miles.
All of the celebrated women who took time out of their very busy schedules to help girls honor their true selves I thank you.
Ms. WinfreyI am eternally grateful.
Marnie Cochran, when I first met you I knew that you were the one. Thank you for your incredible energy and guidance. I owe so much to you. And to Brian McLendon, Kim Hovey Christine Cabello, and the entire publicity and marketing teams at Ballantine, much gratitude for continuing to be champions of this book and making it such a success!
Debra Goldstein, thank you for believing in this book and for working tirelessly to make sure my vision came to life. I know I can always count on you to be there for me.
Billie Fitzpatrick, you are an amazingly gifted woman with the most gentle voice. Thank you for creating a beautiful partnership and for helping me present our message to girls so eloquently.
Peter Harper, you really got the ball rolling for me when this project was in its infancy. Thank you for your advice and for guiding me in the right direction.
Ken Lindnerfrom Miami to L.A., you've been my champion for so many years. We've done some great work together!
Angela Cochran, thank you for all of your input and research, and helping me find so many of the wonderful women for this book.
Adam Jordan, I have so much appreciation for your wonderful gift to my favorite organization, Girls Inc., and also for the use of your Rolodex.
Patrik Henry Bass, you make me laugh so much. Thank you for being such a wonderful source of information and joviality.
Lolita Files, Sherri Evans-Harris, Will Thomas, Rob Silverstein, Jeneine Doucette, Nancy Harrison, Chris Fahey, Joe Schlosser, Mandy Ellis, Alison Lee, Brenda Buchanan, Brenda Davenport, Ralph Oshiro, and Steve Chan Cheea special thank-you for all the support you have given me throughout this project.
To all of the girls who trusted me enough to bare their soulsJewel, Angelica, Lyric, Dasia, Alana, Ali, Bryanna, Cameron, Jacklyn, Katy, Lauren, Shayne, Tiffany, Mary, Kaylin, LaTece, Shamika, Alexandria, Ariana, Jessica, Makeda, Patrice, Pilar, Pleh, Shani, Rashri, Xiomara, Aryn, Adrienne, Aundrea, Charmaine, Marquesha, Tiesha, Kenya. Your voices give this book its heart.
Finally, this book would not have been possible without the help of the publicists, agents, and managers who represented the wonderful women I interviewed for this project. Thanks to all of you for believing in my message: Kelly Bush, Lisa Halliday, Angela DePaul, Michelle McIntyre, Megan Kopf, Lauren Kapp, Kimberly Connors, Paul Bloch, Stan Rosenfield, Brad Cafarelli, Stephen Huvane, Paul Freundlich, Heidi Schaeffer, Thea Ellis, Laura M. Wright, Kelli Haylard, Sarah Fuller, Jenn Sousa, Roger Widynowski, Kim Jakwerth, Rene Angelil, David Naranjo, Frank Amadeo, Barry Dale Johnson, Alexis Rodriguez, Matthew Trachtenberg, Patti Webster, Jamie Mendoza, Jessica Davenport, Sally Zumalt, Maurice Luque, Amanda Silverman, LB, Michelle Elisabeth, Scott Cooke, Neal Schiff, Sahar Sanjar, Jon Leshay, Amy Pfister, Reen Nalli, Tracey Miller, Val Ackerman, Caroline Williams, Lewis Kay, Nicki Fioravante, Brendan Daly, Paula Madison, Danica Smith, Angelica Cob-Baehler, Toni DiMartino, Nicole Corcoran, Evan Morgenstein, Natalie Godwin, Karla Coleman, Tony Velasquez.
I believe we all struggle with self-esteem, whether we are fourteen, thirty-four, or fifty-four. When we look in the mirror, enter a classroom, walk into a party, or stand up in front of a crowd to give a presentationor, in my case, interview a celebrity live on national TVit is completely natural to question our power, our attractiveness, and our abilities to one degree or another.
I remember feeling this way when I first auditioned for my job at Access Hollywood. I had come from a strong news background, having worked in several local markets. I was an award-winning journalist who had covered every news story imaginable. I was very solid live, after anchoring countless hours of breaking news. So when I auditioned, I knew I had the credentials, but something happened when I actually got on the set of this national show that I had watched for years. Suddenly I felt terrified! When it came to reading the copy I froze. Thoughts started swirling around in my mind: Why me? How could they pick me? I'm sure there are many talented people trying out for this job. The director was waiting. Read the copy, Shaun, I kept saying to myself. Those seconds seemed to last forever.
Somehow, I got the words out.
As soon as I got on the plane heading back to Miami, my eyes started welling up with tears. I was convinced that I had just blown a huge opportunity. How could I go from being a local news reporter to my dream job on a national entertainment show? All those negative voices of self-doubt started quickly creeping in. Then, a week later, Access called and told me I got the job. Wow. I couldn't believe all the time I'd wasted beating myself up! This year, I celebrate my tenth year with the show. Whenever I start to question myself and my abilities, I try to remember that time in my life.
As an entertainment reporter, I live and work in a world of celebrity, and I love covering Hollywood. It's a lot of fun meeting and getting to know the personalities who star in your favorite TV show, who you cheered for in that Oscar-winning movie, or whose music you jam to on your iPod. There are many celebrities I have become friends with because I like the people they are off-cameragenuine, down-to-earth, caring individuals. And yes, it is interesting to peek into the lives of the rich and famous, see how they spend their time, and scoop up some of their top-secret beauty and fitness tips. But as we well know, this fun pastime of celeb patrol has ballooned into a cultural obsession and it's having a dramatic effect on young women, most notably on their self-esteem.
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