Robert J. Kriegel - How to Succeed in Business Without Working So Damn Hard: Rethinking the Rules, Reinventing the Game

Copyright 2002 by Kriegel 2 Inc.

All rights reserved.

Warner Books, Inc.,

Hachette Book Group

237 Park Avenue

New York, NY 10017

ISBN: 978-0-7595-2710-2

First eBook Edition: February 2002

Visit our website at www.HachetteBookGroup.com.

SACRED COWS MAKE THE BEST BURGERS
(with David Brandt)

IF IT AINT BROKE BREAK IT!
(with Louis Patler)

INNER SKIING
(with W. Timothy Gallwey)

THE C ZONE: PEAK PERFORMANCE UNDER PRESSURE
(with Marilyn Harris Kriegel)

To Marilyn, my lover, coach, editor, pal, soul mate, and life partner, for helping me to get out of my niches and ruts, for inspiring me with your creativity and integrity, and for your continuing support and encouragement.

Many, many, many thanks to:

Caryn Stanley, for managing my office, my schedule, and a lot of my life, and for going beyond what I thought possible with care, creativity, and a great sense of humor.

Lisa Ruggiero for the extra effort you gave on this project and for adding warmth and fun to our office.

My son and best friend, Otis, for your love, support, creativity, and the incredible ability to get me to laugh and not take myself so seriously.

Rob McMahon for your terrific editing and friendship.

Mark Rosenblatt for your innovative ideas and hands-on help.

Katina Matson and John Brockman, as always, for your professionalism in representing me as well as for the great times had hanging out together.

Susan Suffes, Mike Stanley, and Myrtle Harris for your friendship, continued support, and creative feedback.

The friends at my speakers bureaus for continually recommending me.

All who have participated in my programs and attended my speeches.

You know you are working too damn hard when:

You always feel like youre behind, running a little late.

You are irritable, critical, or short-tempered.

You see less and less of your friends and family.

You get more headaches and stomachaches.

You have a tough time relaxing.

You feel guilty when you arent working.

Its all work and no play.

Youre married to your job.

You tire easily.

You have trouble falling asleep.

You sometimes feel depressed or sad without any apparent reason.

You need to be continually busy.

Youre not having much fun.

T he secret of my success is simple. I just work harder than anyone else, said the first of four speakers on a superstar panel at a national convention of mortgage brokers. She then went on to describe her typical workday, which began at five A.M. and ended at about ten P.M. and consisted of calling on realtors, sending out weekly update sheets, writing new ads, attending open houses, shaking lots of hands, and endless schmoozing and boozing.

The next two speakers practically lip-synched her words. I was exhausted just listening. A great success strategy, I thoughtfor not having a life.

Its no secret that people are buying into this marathon madness as their strategy for success. These days the average workweek is sixty hours and rising. The average business lunch is thirty-six minutes and falling. And a ninety- to one-hundred-hour workweek is the norm for many young hounds on the scent of the big score.

My seatmate on a recent flight, a young man in his early thirties who worked for one of the big five accounting firms, told me that his normal workweek was one-hundred-plus hours. And he was bragging about it as if it were an indication of how cool he was.

I often overhear people boasting about the meeting the previous night that lasted until two A.M. For these folks, success is directly related to the number of hours they spend at the office. As if the longer and harder they work, the more they will be looked at as superheroes. What isnt admitted or possibly even realizedis that when you work that late, your brain is too fried to be productive. Quality and creativity rarely emanate out of an exhausted mind. More mistakes are made when youre tired or pumped on caffeine, which means having to redo in the light of day what you did at night.

The last company I worked at had five different design teams. And there was a crazy contest that occurred at the end of the day, Mike McDevitt, a Clio Awardwinning graphic and Web site designer in New York City, told me. No one wanted to be the first to leave. There was a stigma about it. It meant that you werent doing your job or working hard enough. Or that you were a wuss. Its as if peoples self-worth was directly related to how late they stayed at the office.

No matter how tough you think you are, the stress resulting from this work-longer-and-harder strategy is enormous. And that stress doesnt magically disappear at the end of the workday. You dont just leave your office and instantly transform into a relaxed, easygoing person.

As a culture, we have become more irritable, quick-tempered, cranky, and negative. Witness the outbreak of road rage and airline rage. We consume over fifteen tons of aspirin and roll upon roll of Rolaids in an effort to combat the nervous minds and jumpy stomachs caused by stress. Depressing? Well, more than twenty-two million people are taking mood-lifting drugs like Prozac and Zoloft.

Quality time with your spouse? Romantic evenings? Great sex? Fuhgeddaboudit! Over 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. Seen your kids lately? Been to a Little League game or the play they were in? A study of one thousand third to twelfth graders by Ellen Galinsky, cofounder of the Families and Work Institute, revealed that whats most important to children is that their parents bring less stress home from work and focus more on them when the family is together.

Yet the children of todays workforce, shuffled and shuttled from dance class to soccer practice to homework to bed, are managed rather than loved. And we wonder why so many have problems and act out.

Vacations, if taken at all, have become long weekends with a cell phone in the golf bag or a beeper in a backpack. Its no wonder that so many people are asking the same tough question: How come, if Im so successful, Im not having more fun? And if Im so together, why do I feel so out of control?