Gaur Gopal Das - The Way of the Monk

Any references to writing in this book refer to the original printed version. Readers should write on a separate piece of paper in these instances.

Gaur Gopal Das has lived as a monk in an ashram in Mumbai for over twenty years. After years learning the antiquity of ancient philosophy and the modernity of contemporary psychology, he became a life coach to thousands in the city.

Gaur Gopal Das has been travelling the world since 2005, sharing his wisdom with corporate executives, universities and charities. In 2016, his global popularity exploded as he took his message online. With millions of views of his videos on social media, he has begun to lead a movement to help others achieve happiness and purpose in their lives and is now one of the most famous monks in the world.

To my beloved mother, late father, grandmother and sisteryour love remains the foundation of all I try to do!

A word of caution: I have changed the names in this story. This adjustment is not only sensitive towards the couple whose secrets I am about to share, but also to avoid offending those who have ever fed me sambar that didnt live up to the standard set by the Iyers.

Have you ever experienced the Indian monsoon? It brings one of the fiercest, most thunderous downpours of water from the heavens. If youre caught in the heavy rain, its nearly impossible to stay dry. Similarly, it is hard not to get caught up in the challenges and negative situations of the world. Feeling peaceful, happy and content is not about avoiding challenges in our life, but about how we navigate through these challenges to reach the type of life we want to live.

Aldous Huxley said, Experience is not what happens to a man, it is what a man does with what happens to him. Its how we respond that makes all the difference. If there is one possession we have that is the most valuable and can truly transform our lives completely, it is our free will. We are the authors of our own life stories. Challenges and difficulties may fall upon us, just as the monsoon rains fall upon our head. We dont seek them or solicit them. They just come our way. We must choose how to respond.

Happiness does not come automatically. From a young age we receive methodical education in a variety of areas and fields, but happiness is usually not one of them. To live a happy life, with integrity and with balance, is one of lifes amazing secrets which is revealed within this book. These are simple principles that can be used by anyone to experience a sense of satisfaction.

Do you ever feel irritable or frustrated? Do you ever feel that life isnt going your way? Do you ever feel that there is a key part of your life that needs attention? If the answer to any or all of these questions is a yes, its a sign that your life is probably out of balance. The secret of life is finding balance: not too much, not too little. Just as a car balances on four wheels, we must balance the four crucial areas of our life: our personal life, our relationships, our work life and our social contribution.

Balance on an external level is about the alignment of the wheels. It is about adjusting our priorities based on the need of the moment, and focusing on that particular wheel which is out of alignment. At some points in our lives our work life may need more focus than our personal life. Have you ever wanted to spend time with someone who needs to meet a project deadline at work? Its impossible. They are too busy reaching their target. At other times our personal life may take precedence over everything else. Have you ever asked a couple organizing their wedding to spend more time at work? Its unreasonable to do so as they are planning one of the most important days of their lives. Dear friends, we must be willing to adjust our priorities to bring those wheels into alignment.

However, a deeper aspect of balance that resides within us is about our attitudes and values, which we explore in the different sections of this book. That attitude is like the air in the tyres of the car. If the tyres of the car are not at the correct pressure, there can be a puncture, stopping us from getting to our destination. This is why we have to navigate the internal aspects of balance. If the external tenets of balance are adjustment and alignment, then the internal ones are attitude and values.

As we balance ourselves externally and internally, it is fundamental to our success that we never let go of the steering wheelour spirituality. If all the wheels are in proper alignment, if the air pressure in the tyres is optimal, but we do not have the steering wheel in our hands, we still will not be able to reach where we want to go. It was the Buddha who said, Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, we cannot live without a spiritual life. Spirituality, in whatever genuine form of practice, brings purpose to our life and gives us a destination worth going to. At times we may feel empty or lost or have an existential crisis, when we feel that we do not know where our life is taking us. It is at those times that we must hold the steering wheel of spirituality tightly and press on. The steering wheel comprises four pieces: our spiritual practice (sadhana), the association that we keep (sanga), our character (sadachar) and our service to God and to others (seva). When all these aspects of the steering wheel are adhered to properly, they give us the ability to drive the car of our life towards its destination.

Lets get there, together.

As you become successful, do not forget the keys to happiness.

Although I grew up in Pune, my heart lies in a simple ashram, paradoxically situated amidst the skyline of downtown Mumbai. I have lived there as a monk for twenty-two years, during which time I have not only been studying ancient eastern wisdom for my enrichment, but also learning how to share its practical application with the world. People who attend my lectures regularly invite me to have lunch at their homes but, to their disappointment, I usually decline. As a monk, I have to be cautious of overindulgence; it is essential to stay regulated in our habits. But after months of pleading, I hesitantly accepted an invitation to go to Mr and Mrs home, a decision that would deepen my understanding of happiness in the long run.

Mumbai is notoriously humid in mid-May. Its the type of sticky humidity in which your sweat causes your shirt to stick to your back. But one only felt like that at sea level, not in the cloud-bound apartment of Hariprasad and Lalita Iyer situated in a high-rise in elegant Worli. This area of Mumbai is what Fifth Avenue is to New York, or Park Lane is to London. Indeed, if there were a version of the board game Monopoly for Mumbai, you would be paying a hefty price if you landed on Worlis distinguished towers: Palais Royale or Omkar 1973. And, here I was, a monk with hardly a rupee to my name, enjoying the cooling breeze from the Arabian Sea on the twenty-eighth-floor home of my gracious hosts.