Karen Deerwester - The Potty Training Answer Book: Practical Answers to the Top 200 Questions Parents Ask

THE

Potty Training

Answer Book

Practical Answers to the Top 200 Questions Parents Ask

KARENDEERWESTER

Copyright 2007 by Karen Deerwester

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Published by Sourcebooks, Inc.

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ISBN-13: 978-1-4022-2047-0

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VP 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Dedication

To parents everywhere who never give up,

May your bathrooms be happy places.

And to Amanda, Brett, and Ayden,

The love keeps growing.

Contents

Rea

diness and Personality

Y

our Family

f

rom the Trenches

an

d Stories

an

d CDs

Acknowledgments

This book was written with the help of thousands of parents who shared their stories and their childrens early years with me. Some of their one-time two-year-olds have now graduated from college. I cherish the times we laughed and sometimes cried together, continually celebrating the magical world of young children. Thank you for showing me the joys and the struggles of parenthood. Our time together will always be among the greatest gifts in my life.

A special thank-you goes to the staff and families of the Ruth and Edward Taubman Early Childhood Center at Bnai Torah Congregation of Boca Raton. Your potty training questions kept me writing when I wondered if I had said all there was to say. Thank you to Pam Appelbaum, Heather Mesch, Leesa Parker, Adele Weissblatt, and Amy Weissman for encouraging me while patiently reading sections for this book. You never ran the other way when I approached you for help. Thank you to Rabbi David Steinhardt, Rabbi David Englander, Rabbi Amy Rader, Stephen Lippy, and especially Nancy Goldstein for inviting Family Time into your amazing school and your joyful community. I feel very fortunate to have a Mommy and Me home at Bnai Torah Congregation.

A heartfelt thank-you goes to Maria Bailey, for continually inspiring me to try new things; Dr. Michelle LaRocque, for taking the time to lend her early childhood knowledge and professional feedback; Dr. Jordan Mussary, MD, FAAP, for reviewing the pediatricians list; and Bethany Brown at Sourcebooks, Inc., for her detailed insights, her optimism, and her belief that I was the right person for this project.

Thank you to all the other friends and family who keep me smiling. To Paula Basa, Louise Goldberg, Ellyn Laub, Tim Leistner, Ellen Munnelly, Liza Muschett, and Joan Stillwellthanks for keeping me on schedule, for allowing my writing to interrupt more important things you may have been doing, and for sustaining friendships that are bigger than a book and so much bigger than today. To Dave Sestrich, thanks for standing by me through thick and thin. Thanks to Lynn and Heather for cheering for me. And finally, thanks to Richard. I couldnt have gotten to this point in my life without you. You showed me how to have big dreams. I love you all very much.

Introduction

Your child is a unique little person with a blooming personality. He is ready, or nearly ready, to embark on one of the greatest adventures of early childhoodlearning to control his body and potty in a special place. He is ready, or nearly ready, to know what he needs and to manage some unique potty situations.

He has no idea why this is a big deal to so many people around him. He does not know that so many people will be watching and waiting to hear about his potty progress. He does not know some people expect him to do this a certain way or in a specific amount of time. Luckily, he has no idea others think he can fail.

Your child cannot fail.

All children are potty trained in good time. Naturally, there are obstacles and setbacks, and potty training rarely goes the way you imagine. However, if you are prepared and realistic about your child and your situation, potty training is a fun and positive experience. You will not fail.

Potty training is a natural step in development. Your child has been growing at incredible speed for the last few years. Just as she learned to walk, talk, sing, dance, climb, and laugh, she now wants to take care of her body. Just as she learned to imitate, pretend, be serious, and be silly, she now wants to learn more and do more. Although it felt great for a while to have someone else meeting all of her needs, she now realizes the satisfaction and joy of acting on her own. The first time your toddler looked at you and said, No, your little girl began her growth toward independence.

Potty training is an inevitable rite of passage for you and your child. Together you will learn to use developmental skills to accomplish a task that signals a move from one stage of dependency to a new stage of independence. You and your child are growing. Shout Hooray!

This book will be by your side, answering each and every question that arises during your personal potty training adventure. You will know what potty training readiness looks like. You will know how to prepare your child for potty training. You will know how to make the transition from diapers to a potty and to support any possible confusion or resistance.

However, a one-size potty plan does not fit all potty training situations. Your potty training experiences will be just as unique as you and your child. This book will help you to customize the perfect plan for your child with a full awareness of your childs personal strengths and complete respect for your childs individuality. Your child is never wrong for doing things his way. Your personal potty plan celebrates your child and his childhood while giving you and your child the tools to move forward with confidence.

Come alongtake this potty adventure knowing that you will be successful. Listen and watch your child. This is his time to discover everything he can do. This is your time to follow where he wants to go and to lead him to places he never imagined.

You can read this book by jumping to the questions that meet your immediate needs or you can read through the questions chapter by chapter. Each chapter moves you deeper into the day-to-day reality of potty training.