NEETA IYER
JAICO PUBLISHING HOUSE
Ahmedabad Bangalore Bhopal Bhubaneswar Chennai Delhi Hyderabad Kolkata Lucknow Mumbai
Published by Jaico Publishing House A-2
Jash Chambers, 7-A Sir Phirozshah Mehta Road
Fort, Mumbai - 400 001
www.jaicobooks.com
Neeta Iyer
FIND_LOVE.COM
ISBN 978-81-8495-416-6
First Jaico Impression: 2013
No part of this book may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publishers.
Page design and layouts: Special Effects, Mumbai
Printed by
Repro India Limited
Plot No. 50/2, T.T.C. MIDC Industrial Area
Mahape, Navi Mumbai - 400 710.
To my mentor Dr Daisaku Ikeda, for helping me discover the wings I never knew I had and now, the sky is where I love to hang out.
Contents
Prologue
When did you last see love? In your mothers eyes this morning, as you were feasting on her affectionately made aloo paratha? Or in the heart-felt smile of that new intern at work? Or on Shaadi.com?
When Swati Kannan awoke to the rumour of the world ending on 21st December 2012, she had just one unfulfilled desireto experience marital bliss before calamity struck (though many believe that calamity strikes the minute you decide to get married!). Its a busy world and with sales targets, traffic jams, demanding bosses, friends and family, 24 hours just dont seem enough. This was never the case with Swati though. As a radio jockey responsible for a 4-hour morning time band, she had all the time in the world. So, she decided to have a focused approach, find love and get done with it. But boy, little did she know what she was plunging into! An impressive matrimonial bio data was prepared and after careful editing and re-editing, uploaded on all the Indian matrimonial websites ever known to mankind. The display picture for these sites was the most liked profile picture on Facebook, with 140 likes. With a Punjabi mother and a Tamilian father by her side, Swati set out to find love. Did she succeed? Lets find out!
Introduction
So, did your parents have a romantic love affair followed by the saat phere or did it all happen the conventional way? My parents had a knockout love story, unheard of in their generation. A Punjabi bride, a Madrasi groom they met while working with the armed forces. He was a doctor, she a dietician. He was 6', she hardly 5'2".
Love is a funny thing. When you get stuck on someone, you just get stuck. All reasoning fails. My father knew that this love story would never be approved of by Dadaji and there was intense opposition from Naniji too. Getting up at 4 a.m. to take a bath and then perform puja, a pucca Brahmin, Dadaji led a very pious life. He would never approve of Bhangra or butter chicken. Naniji, an enterprising lady who operated a dairy farm, was full of life, popular in social circles and loved butter chicken. With few friends and many foes, this love story wasnt going anywhere.
So, the couple came up with an awesome idea. They got married and sent telegrams to their families: We are married. Seek your blessings.
The families had no choice but to respond to the couples seeking spirit. In the 1970s, a love story like this was quite a story. The joint family system was prevalent and people were brought together for a prospective marriage by the elders of the family. There was no concept of dating or of I-want-to-know-you-better-before-we-plunge-into-this. The boy with his parents met the girl with her parents, usually at the girls residence. Parents discussed essential matters. The prospective bride and groom just managed to smile at each other, the only conversation being chai mein cheeni kitni? to which the boy replied coyly, ek chamach .
In some cases, only photographs were exchanged and you got to see your life partner only at the shaadi ka mandap .
Times have changed. The twenty-first century has brought with it Shaadi.com, Simplymarry.com, Jeevansathi.com, Bharatmatrimony.com, and of course matrimonial advertisements in the dailies with excellent descriptions that make all prospective brides and grooms appear no less than film starsKatrina Kaifs and Hrithik Roshans.
Who wants to travel this road? If you are professionally qualified, attractive, 29 years old and single, do you really have a choice? So, to begin with, you register yourself on all the matrimonial websites, get cool swanky close-up and full-length pictures shot, and write an impressive matrimonial bio data.
But it isnt as simple as it sounds. The pages to follow unravel my journey to find that perfect companion in an imperfect world under the most imperfect circumstances. We are not perfect, far from it in fact, but so what? Perfection is what we all desire!
Chapter 1
Apprehensive Anurag
A short-lived career as a cabin crew. A popular radio jockey with a private radio station in New Delhi, India. Yet, no eye candy in the vicinity. There was no dearth of male attention, and I got enough of it. But how do you express your excitement when uncles and bhaiyas and guys five times your size send you secret love letters or a bouquet of red roses on Valentines Day or even Rs 5,000 on your birthday expressing their selfless love for you?
Love marriages have always been in fashion, but when you cant do the job yourself, mom and dad are always there to wipe your tearsas they were there to wipe your poop. Every eligible girl or boy registered on a matrimonial website has had a romantic dream that hasnt seen the light of daytheir soulmate finds another soulmate and the Internet offers them a second chance.
This chance is not so easy to explore. In Jan. 2010, for the first time I saw a profile on a matrimonial website and my heart skipped a beat. An alumni from IIM-Ahmedabad, tall, fair, handsome, earning well, Anurag Sehdev and everything about him seemed just so right. I couldnt be rejected by any manthis was my self-belief. Overconfidence kills. My best friend, FB (aka Facebook), came to the rescue. And there he was and there were all his pictures and he looked oh-so-good. I just knew I had found my man, and feeling all woozy, I sent him a friend request. My mother had become an expert in scrutinizing profiles, with an experience of almost 2 years at the job. She had also expressed an interest in this profile as the mature parent. Mrs Radha Kannan was always on the lookout for a changa Punjabi munda .
Meanwhile, love-struck, never before had I waited for anybody to accept my friend request with such eagerness. And then, after a gruesome wait of 2 days, my hero replied. Do I know you, Ms Swati Kannan? I was convinced about Mr Sehdev being my soulmate for seven lives before and after, and here he wanted to verify facts before accepting my friend request. Wasnt my hot profile picture enough? Disappointed, but not ready to give up, I replied, No, found your profile very interesting though. My flirting skills definitely needed some brushing up.
My wait never ended. Anurag never replied and this love story ended without any tears or bloodshed. Anurag Sehdev is in his late 30s, can still be found on all existing matrimonial websites, and is logged in 247. Each time your matrimonial ad appears in any of the leading dailies, Anurag will respond with his pictures and profile. His profile says, Never settle down till you are convinced. How do you help a person who can never be convinced because he is so confused?
