Agatha Christie - One, two, buckle my shoe

The novel uses the variant, Five, six, picking up sticks.

One, Two,

Buckle My Shoe

To Dorothy North

who likes detective stories and cream,

in the hope it may make up to her for

the absence of the latter!

One, two, buckle my shoe,

Three, four, shut the door,

Five, six, picking up sticks,

Seven, eight, lay them straight,

Nine, ten, a good fat hen,

Eleven, twelve, men must delve,

Thirteen, fourteen, maids are courting,

Fifteen, sixteen, maids in the kitchen,

Seventeen, eighteen, maids in waiting,

Nineteen, twenty, my plates empty

Contents

About Agatha Christie

The Agatha Christie Collection

E-book Extras

Chapters1 ,2 ,3 ,4 ,5 ,6 ,7 ,8 ,9 ,10

www.agathachristie.com

About the Publisher

One, Two,

Buckle my Shoe

I

Mr Morley was not in the best of tempers at breakfast. He complained of the bacon, wondered why the coffee had to have the appearance of liquid mud, and remarked that breakfast cereals were each one worse than the last.

Mr Morley was a small man with a decided jaw and a pugnacious chin. His sister, who kept house for him, was a large woman rather like a female grenadier. She eyed her brother thoughtfully and asked whether the bath water had been cold again.

Rather grudgingly, Mr Morley said it had not.

He glanced at the paper and remarked that the Government seemed to be passing from a state of incompetence to one of positive imbecility!

Miss Morley said in a deep bass voice that it was Disgraceful!

As a mere woman she had always found whatever Government happened to be in power distinctly useful. She urged her brother on to explainwhy the Governments present policy was inconclusive, idiotic, imbecile and frankly suicidal!

When Mr Morley had expressed himself fully on these points, he had a second cup of the despised coffee and unburdened himself of his true grievance.

These girls, he said, are all the same! Unreliable, self-centrednot to be depended on in any way.

Miss Morley said interrogatively:

Gladys?

Ive just had the message. Her aunts had a stroke and shes had to go down to Somerset.

Miss Morley said:

Very trying, dear, but after all hardly the girlsfault .

Mr Morley shook his head gloomily.

How do I know the aunthas had a stroke? How do I know the whole thing hasnt been arranged between the girl and that very unsuitable young fellow she goes about with? That young man is a wrong

un if I ever saw one! Theyve probably planned some outing together for today.

Oh, no, dear, I dont think Gladys would do a thing like that. You know, youve always found her very conscientious.

Yes, yes.

An intelligent girl and really keen on her work, you said.

Yes, yes, Georgina, but that was before this undesirable young man came along. Shes been quite different latelyquitedifferentabsent-mindedupsetnervy.

The Grenadier produced a deep sigh. She said:

After all, Henry, girls do fall in love. It cant be helped.

Mr Morley snapped:

She oughtnt to let it affect her efficiency as my secretary. And today, in particular, Im extremely busy!

Severalvery important patients. It ismost trying!

Im sure it must be extremely vexing, Henry. How is the new boy shaping, by the way?

Henry Morley said gloomily:

Hes the worst Ive had yet! Cant get a single name right and has the most uncouth manners. If he doesnt improve I shall sack him and try again. I dont know whats the good of our education nowadays. It seems to turn out a collection of nit-wits who cant understand a single thing you say to them, let alone remember it.

He glanced at his watch.

I must be getting along. A full morning, and that Sainsbury Seale woman to fit in somewhere as she is in pain. I suggested that she should see Reilly, but she wouldnt hear of it.

Of course not, said Georgina loyally.

Reillys very ablevery able indeed. First-class diplomas. Thoroughly up-to-date in his work.

His hand shakes, said Miss Morley. In my opinion hedrinks .

Her brother laughed, his good temper restored. He said:

Ill be up for a sandwich at half-past one as usual.

II

At the Savoy Hotel Mr Amberiotis was picking his teeth with a toothpick and grinning to himself. Everything was going very nicely.

He had had his usual luck. Fancy those few kind words of his to that idiotic hen of a woman being so richly repaid. Oh! wellcast your bread upon the waters. He had always been a kind-hearted man.And generous! In the future he would be able to be even more generous. Benevolent visions floated before his eyes. Little DimitriAnd the good Constantopopolus struggling with his little restaurantWhat pleasant surprises for them

The toothpick probed unguardedly and Mr Amberiotis winced. Rosy visions of the future faded and gave way to apprehensions of the immediate future. He explored tenderly with his tongue. He took out his notebook. Twelve oclock. 58, Queen Charlotte Street.

He tried to recapture his former exultant mood. But in vain. The horizon had shrunk to six bare words:

58, Queen Charlotte Street. Twelve oclock.

III

At the Glengowrie Court Hotel, South Kensington, breakfast was over. In the lounge, Miss Sainsbury Seale was sitting talking to Mrs Bolitho. They occupied adjacent tables in the dining-room and had made friends the day after Miss Sainsbury Seales arrival a week ago.

Miss Sainsbury Seale said:

You know, dear, it reallyhas stopped aching! Not a twinge! I think perhaps Ill ring up

Mrs Bolitho interrupted her.

Now dont be foolish, my dear. You go to the dentist andget it over .

Mrs Bolitho was a tall, commanding female with a deep voice. Miss Sainsbury Seale was a woman of forty odd with indecisively bleached hair rolled up in untidy curls. Her clothes were shapeless and rather artistic, and her pince-nez were always dropping off. She was a great talker. She said now wistfully:

But really, you know, it doesnt acheat all .

Nonsense, you told me you hardly slept a wink last night.

No, I didntno, indeedbut perhaps,now , the nerve has actuallydied .

All the more reason to go to the dentist, said Mrs Bolitho firmly. We all like to put it off, but thats just cowardice. Better make up ones mind andget it over !

Something hovered on Miss Sainsbury Seales lips. Was it the rebellious murmur of: Yes, but its not your tooth!

All she actually said, however, was:

I expect youre right. And Mr Morley is such a careful man and really never hurts oneat all .

IV

The meeting of the Board of Directors was over. It had passed off smoothly. The report was good. There should have been no discordant note. Yet to the sensitive Mr Samuel Rotherstein there had been something , some nuance in the chairmans manner.

There had been, once or twice, a shortness, an acerbity, in his tonequite uncalled for by the proceedings.

Some secret worry, perhaps? But somehow Rotherstein could not connect a secret worry with Alistair Blunt. He was such an unemotional man. He was so very normal. So essentially British. There was, of course, always liverMr Rothersteins liver gave him a bit of trouble from time to time. But hed never known Alistair complain of his liver. Alistairs health was as sound as his brain and his grasp of finance. It was not annoying heartinessjust quiet well-being. And yetthere wassomething once or twice the chairmans hand had wandered to his face. He had sat supporting his chin. Not his normal attitude. And once or twice he had seemed actuallyyes,distrait . They came out of the board room and passed down the stairs.