Christopher Shinn - Teddy Ferrara

TEDDY FERRARA BOOKS BY CHRISTOPHER SHINN PUBLISHED BY TCG Dying City Teddy Ferrara Where Do We Live and Other Plays Includes: Four Other People What Didnt Happen The Coming World Where Do We Live TEDDY FERRARA Christopher Shinn Teddy Ferrara is copyright 2013 by Christopher Shinn Teddy Ferrara is published by Theatre Communications Group, Inc., 520 Eighth Avenue, 24th Floor, New York, NY 10018-4156 All Rights Reserved. Except for brief passages quoted in newspaper, magazine, radio or television reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying or recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that this material, being fully protected under the Copyright Laws of the United States of America and all other countries of the Berne and Universal Copyright Conventions, is subject to a royalty. All rights, including but not limited to, professional, amateur, recording, motion picture, recitation, lecturing, public reading, radio and television broadcasting, and the rights of translation into foreign languages are expressly reserved. Particular emphasis is placed on the question of readings and all uses of this book by educational institutions, permission for which must be secured from the authors agent: George Lane, Creative Artists Agency, 162 Fifth Avenue, 6th Floor, New York, NY 10010, (212) 277-9000. M. M.

Coetzee, copyright 2007. First published in the United States by Viking Penguin, a member of Penguin Group (USA), Inc., New York, 2008. The publication of Teddy Ferrara, by Christopher Shinn, through TCGs Book Program, is made possible in part by the New York State Council on the Arts with the support of Governor Andrew Cuomo and the New York State Legislature. TCG books are exclusively distributed to the book trade by Consortium Book Sales and Distribution. LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA Shinn, Christopher. pages cm eISBN 978-1-55936-757-8 1. pages cm eISBN 978-1-55936-757-8 1.

Gay studentsDrama. I. Title. PS3569.H498T43 2014 813.54dc23 2013026229 Book design and composition by Lisa Govan Cover photograph by Andreas Ackerup / Link Image / Gallery Stock Cover design by Mark Melnick First Edition, November 2013 For Max TEDDY FERRARA Contents Teddy Ferrara received its world premiere at Goodman Theatre (Robert Falls, Artistic Director; Roche Schulfer, Executive Director) in Chicago on February 11, 2013. It was directed by Evan Cab-net; set design was by Lee Savage, costume design was by Jenny Mannis, lighting design was by Keith Parham, sound design was by Richard Woodbury; the production stage manager was Dana M. Nestrick and the dramaturg was Tanya Palmer.

The cast was:

GABE	Liam Benzvi
DREW	Adam Poss
NICKY	Rashaad Hall
TEDDY	Ryan Heindl
TIM	Josh Salt
JENNY	Paloma Nozicka
PRESIDENT	Patrick Clear
PROVOST	Janet Ulrich Brooks
ELLEN	Kelli Simpkins
JAQ	Jax Jackson
JAY	Christopher Imbrosciano
CAMPUS POLICE	Dev Kennedy and Fawzia Mirza

The time is now. The place is on and nearby the campus of a large state university in the Northeast. CHARACTERS GABE, twenty-one DREW, twenty-one NICKY, twenty TEDDY, eighteen TIM, twenty-one JENNY, twenty-one PRESIDENT, sixties PROVOST, fifties ELLEN, forties JAQ, twenty-four JAY, twenty-one CAMPUS POLICE, thirties NOTES The design should be simple in order to maximize speed of story-telling. Interval between 3.7 and 4.1. Love: what the heart aches for. M. M.

Coetzee, Diary of a Bad Year Drew enters. DREW: Need help? GABE: Hey! DREW: Jesus. Sure this wasnt the meeting of the Dessert Club? GABE: I said refreshments in the fliers. I thought more people might come if we had cupcakes. DREW: So either no one came, or you got a lot of cupcakes. GABE: No one had any! Maybe gay guys dont want to be fat? DREW: But dykes dont care about that.

GABE: Drew! DREW: Um, its truelesbians are not as body-obsessed as gay dudes. GABE: Well, were still not really attracting lesbians. I opened the box and everyone just stared! DREW: If Id been here I would have had one. GABE: But you werent. DREW: That is true, I was not! Mm, this is good. Too sweetwhich is good.

GABE: Some people had Diet Coke. Its so hard to get people interested in this group! DREW: Queer students want to spend their time being queer, not in a Queer Students group. GABE: Why is it so hard to build a community? Its so frustrating to me DREW: Im telling youFridays the deadline to declareif you really want to make an impact GABE: Drew, I am not going to be Student Assembly President! DREW: You would win. GABE: Im not that kind ofbig personality. DREW: Yes you are! Are you not doing it because you think Tim would be mad at you? GABE: Why would Tim be mad? Hes not running for reelection. (They kiss.) DREW: And its a week and a halfjerk (Teddy enters.) TEDDY: Is this the Queer Students meeting? DREW: Its over. (They kiss.) DREW: And its a week and a halfjerk (Teddy enters.) TEDDY: Is this the Queer Students meeting? DREW: Its over.

GABE: It was three to fourbut I can fill you inwhats your name? TEDDY: Ted FerraraTeddyTed GABE: Ted Ferrara. Ill add you on Facebookall we did today was talk about who we are, brainstorm ideasIll message you about it later. Were sponsoring a dance party Thursday, if you can come to thatand we meet here every Tuesday, three to four. TEDDY: I thought it was four. GABE: Nothing much happens at the first meeting. Hopefully you can come to the dance party.

Its just off campus, at The Lair, eighteen to get inall the infos on our website. TEDDY: Okay. (Teddy exits.) DREW: What a weirdo. GABE: He was a little awkward... DREW: Um: weirdo. GABE: He looks like a freshman.

I was a mess my first yearuntil I met Tim DREW: Are you in love with Tim? GABE: Am I in love with Tim? Whats that supposed to mean? DREW: Hes hot, youre always talking about him GABE: Hes my best friend. And hes straight. DREW: You cant be in love with a straight guy? Youre attracted to menhes a man. GABE: Well. No, Im not in love with Tim. I should have offered him a cupcake.

DREW: He wouldnt have taken it. Lets go somewhere and make out. GABE: What am I going to do with all these? (Drew kisses Gabe.) Dont you have to do newspaper stuff? DREW: Yes, but I want to make out. GABE: Hastop. DREW: Come over for a little GABE: I thought you had to work all day because you have that big story coming out DREW: Okay, so come to my office GABE: I have work to do DREW: No you dont GABE: I have a paper for my Political Anthropology class DREW: God! So unromantic GABE: I think another group has this room at 4:30so we should DREW: Its 4:03! We could come twice in that time! GABE: Have sex in a classroom? Are you insane? DREW: I was just kidding. God, you take everything so seriously! GABE: Oh.

WellIm a serious person. DREW: Which is why you should run for President. And before you yell at me for saying thatwanna come over tonight? Id like to make you dinner. And you could stay the night... GABE: Like... ? DREW: LikeIll cook dinner.

And youll sleep over for the first time. (Pause.) What? GABE: Nothing DREW: You seem, like, scared suddenly. GABE: No DREW: Why are you scared? GABE: Im not! Im just thinking. DREW: About? GABE: No, I justin my head you had that big story soI just assumed youd be working DREW: I have time. Come over at nine. Okay. Okay.

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