Hall - Fifty-Fifty

Georges son, about twenty-three. A graduate, but unemployed. Dresses casually. Could be bearded and bespectacled. B ARBARA . Georges daughter, age about twenty-five.

Usually a cheery type, but somewhat exhausted by the work involved in looking after her six month old son. T ONY . In his late twenties or early thirties. Well-dressed, efficient worker, who takes everything that he does very seriously. The Play S ETTING : The sitting-room of a modern flat in London.

I did remember you were coming, but I hadnt realised how late it was. (Profferslist.) Eleven a.m., Sarah Lang, see. S ARAH : Yes. (Shelooksround.) It is Monday youre moving out? G EORGE : Yes, yes. Everything will be out by then. Ive got the family coming over this morning to give me a hand.

Sort things out. And weve got people coming tonight. S ARAH : Where are you shifting to? G EORGE : Er not quite sure yet. S ARAH : But youve only got three days. G EORGE : Ill find somewhere. Somethingll turn up it always does.

Ive made a list do sit down. Ah! (Findslist.) Second thoughts, dont sit down. Radiator. Theygoovertoit. Its a bit tricky you turn this handle here anti-clockwise dont let the indicator marks on it fool you, they dont mean a thing. What I usually do is turn it as far as I can, and when its hot enough turn it back to about half way. Failing that, kick it.

Failing that again, send for Mr Burgess. S ARAH : Mr Burgess is the porter? G EORGE : Yes. He wont do much, but you do get warm getting angry about it. (Heseessomethingthroughwindow.) Ah yes, down there is a short cut to the tube will you be using the tube? S ARAH : Yes. G EORGE : Well that tunnelll save you about five minutes. Though I wouldnt use it at night unless you particularly relish being mugged.

Do sit down. Shedoesso.Hecheckshislistagain. Shower? Requires the usual sort of hairsbreadth adjustment, but if you hear upstairs loo flushing, get out quick or youll be scalded. The cooker: high speed thingummy, usual sort of thing, not that I use it much. Am I leaving the fridge? S ARAH , consultingpapers: Yes. G EORGE : Good. I neednt defrost it then.

S ARAH : But youll clean it out. G EORGE : Oh. Right. (Hemakesanoteofit.) G EORGE : Anything else? S ARAH : The rubbish. G EORGE : Mr Burgess again. Supposed to be collected each day but he has strict rules about things being in bags, newspapers must be in bundles tied with string, all that.

But if you use your feminine wiles, Im sure youll be able to twist him around your finger. Hes very susceptible to the ladies. Well, we all are, arent we. Would you like some coffee? Its almost perked. S ARAH : If you have the time. You must be very busy.

G EORGE : Its on the list. S ARAH : Well, if its on the list. One other thing would it be all right if I dropped some stuff over here tomorrow? My flatmates fianc has offered to drive me over it would be a tremendous help. G EORGE : Of course, of course. Cigarette? S ARAH , almostshuddering: God no. G EORGE : Do you mind if I ? S ARAH : Yes.

Since you ask. G EORGE : Oh. Right. S ARAH : Most people only ask automatically; usually it doesnt mean anything. But if youre definitely giving me a choice, then Id prefer it if you didnt smoke. G EORGE : Yes, fine, right.

Quite understand. Coffee. Hegoestothekitchen. S ARAH walksroundlookingatthings.ShepicksuptheMoorcroftvasetolookatitsbase.Shelooksthroughsomeofthebooksandthenisinterestedbythecassetteplayer. G EORGE meanwhilehascomeinwiththecoffeeandgonebackintothekitchen.Here-emergeswithabottleofmilk.Heveersbackandcomesinagain