Debbie Connolly - Better Dog Behaviour

To my Nanna who taught me to read and gave me possibilities.

My love and gratitude to all my friends who have supported the bad and good times and kept me going.

Special thanks and love to Chris and Jen, my lovely family.

Humanizing dog behaviour and imagining that dogs are saying and feeling things they couldnt possibly say or feel are probably the worst and the stupidest things that owners do. Dogs are also often used as emotional weapons between warring family members and have occasionally been the cause of divorces and even violence. Personally I ditched the man and kept the dogs. I always told him there was never any argument about which of them was the most important to me but he didnt listen!

Later chapters will go into more detail about actual training methods, but firstly you need to learn what part humans are playing in causing the problems.

Can dogs feel emotion? My personal feeling is that to some extent they can. They cannot, though, feel guilty, do things on purpose to upset you, exhibit behaviour when you have visitors that is specifically designed to embarrass you, understand a conversation or cook dinner. If they could do these things, wed be their pets, not the other way round. Here is the best (and worst) example I can think of.

I arrived at a smart Victorian semi and could hear the German Shepherd I had come to sort out barking furiously as I got out of the car. I knew this dog had bitten badly on at least two occasions, so I was a little apprehensive to say the least. This sort of work is what I specialize in but Im not Rambo and I wiped my sweaty palms on my coat before knocking. This girl was owned by an elderly couple who I knew spoiled her and I thought I was prepared for the usual lecture about treating her as a dog and not a child. However, I was wrong. It wasnt quite the usual lecture

It took some time for me to get into the house whilst the offending dog was shut into another room and two smiling people greeted me, seemingly oblivious to the murderous noise coming from the kitchen. We sat down and had a long discussion in loud voices whilst the noise abated somewhat. Because this dog was aggressive over food, I had deliberately arranged to be there at dinner time to see them all eating, so in due course we went out into the dining room and the dog was let in. As expected she charged at me barking and I used several swear words to illustrate the fact that I wasnt scared (I was but she didnt need to know). The lady and gentleman went out into the kitchen and for several minutes went through the routine of setting the table, setting three places. The dog watched intently and, as the actual food was carried in, they looked at her and said chair firmly and she jumped up onto one of the dining chairs where a place was set and a plate of human food was placed in front of her.

I was so gob smacked I stood for several seconds probably with my mouth gaping open. I then looked around the room suspiciously, convinced there must be hidden cameras and that either Noel Edmonds or Jeremy Beadle was about to jump out at me and that one of my friends would have to be firmly slapped for setting me up. Of course, that wasnt going to happen. These lovely people had lost the plot. This dog was a family member to them and therefore had to sit with them at dinner. The funny thing about this is that they had worked so hard to get this dog not just to sit at the table, but only to get on the chair when told, and only to get down when told. She wasnt allowed to gobble her food, she had to eat steadily and so had table manners that would put most children to shame. In fact, when grandchildren visited, they were told to Watch Candy and see how to behave.

The effect this treatment had on the dog was catastrophic. German Shepherds are a strong willed, dominant breed with guarding and territorial tendencies. They are a breed that can see gaps in leadership and fill them quite effectively. Dogs do not see unlimited love as kindness, they see it as weakness. Love alone will not train a dog nor gain its respect. Without rules and boundaries most dogs will develop some sort of problem. This dog adored her owners and they adored her even more, but she had no respect for them and this meant none for anyone else.

The dining table behaviour was the tip of the iceberg. When she had bitten the last time, they had sat the dog down and explained to her how upset they were and how disappointed they were with her. They claimed she understood this and looked sorrowfully at the floor, embarrassed . All the time they were telling me this, Candy was glaring at me with a definite homicidal look in her eyes. Every time one of the owners looked directly at her, her expression softened and she smiled at them, then went back to glaring at me. Clever girl she was. Trying to explain to these people that the dog was not embarrassed or upset was impossible. The dog was reacting to their body language and simply trying to appease their annoyance without any idea of what they were talking about. I hadnt got very far into telling them what had to change before they both started to cry. Id only just got to the She cant eat human food and sit at the table before tears welled up and they both dabbed at their eyes with handkerchiefs .

So what could I do? This was much harder to deal with than all the owners who argue and talk rubbish about how they have tried everything. I can shout at them and point out the error of their ways. This was completely different; I had no idea how to tackle them. When I said she couldnt sleep with them any more and had to be left downstairs, a fresh flood of tears started and they said, We cant do that to her, she will become suicidal and hate us. The sad thing is that they meant it. They really believed that this dogs feelings would be so injured she would never speak to them again. So I thought I was really clever in trying a new tactic. I told them she was very stressed by the pressure they put on her to constantly be in charge and guarding them. I said that she must be quite upset at being given so much responsibility and that was why she was overreacting and biting people. Their faces gradually changed and they started looking guilty and concerned. Great, I had cracked it. I went on about how they should take more responsibility by telling her what to do more and give her time off from guarding by having her sleep downstairs and stay in a room alone for short periods. They started nodding in agreement and I thought for one day that was enough for them to digest and I got up to leave, feeling rather clever. I handed to them the notes I had made and said I would come back in a week and see how it was going. We got to the door and I reached to shake hands and the dog promptly bit me on the hand. My fault really, but the lady grabbed the dog and started stroking her furiously, saying, Dont worry, shes going. We wont do any of those horrible things to you that she said. The man seemed a little embarrassed as he looked at the blood on my hand and said, Well calm her down and give her one of her special biscuits. Shell be fine soon, and shut the door. I never did find out if he meant the biscuit was for the dog or his wife.