Lou Harry - The Voodoo Kit Prepack Display of 6 the Voodoo Kit Prepack Display of 6

Like many, my attention span shortened to that of an infants so I sought out different ways to convey my daily frustrations with being a grown-up. The answer, as you may have guessed by now, was charts. I think charts are great because they dont require a bunch of reading and there is an inherent figuring it out component that gives the reader a sense of accomplishment. Plus, there are colors and stuff. And in the internet age, no one wants to spend more than a few seconds looking at something anyway. So, one day I decided over a boring cup of coffee one boring afternoon at a boring office job that I would try to make a chart every day on a whiteboard.

I didnt have any grand plans in mind; I just wanted to see if I could do itand maybe make a couple of my Instagram followers chuckle along the way. And then, like one of those dinosaur sponges that you put in water as a kid, the idea grew. I put some of my charts on Reddit and they went to the front page. Then some websites started to write about me and I got a lot more followers. I figured out that, yup, people liked charts. What follows is a collection of 117 charts, visuals, tables, and graphs thats like a journey through the major steps of adulthoodfrom work, sex, aging, and friendship, to dealing with your slow-witted friends and insane family.

My goal here isnt to change your point of view on these topics, or even to convince you that it will all get better. I just want to make it clear that youre not in this alone. Maybe we can navigate this together and come out on the other side feeling a little more grown up. Or maybe, if you dont feel like doing much growth right now, you can just sit back, relax, and enjoy the pretty pictures.

My first job was at a pool store, dusting hot tubs and testing swimming pool water incorrectly over the summers of my sophomore and junior years of high school. I earned a cool $4.25 an hour.

Oh, how I longed for my lunch breaks, where I would get spicy chicken strips and a Dr Pepper from the KFC next door, if only because destroying my tongue with a sodium burn gave me something to do with my afternoons. Each hour, I would tally up how much I had made so far that day$4.25, $8.50, $12.75and each hour I would be disappointed in how not rich I was becoming. It was my first foray into paid work and the first time I asked myself, Is this really worth it? Flash-forward many years, where I found myself in a conference room at a corporate headquarters of a real company and I had the same question banging around in my head. Throughout the hiring process and all the meetings I had to attend and all the emails I pretended to read, I learned a lot, but none of it was what they were trying to teach me. What I actually learned was that all of this work that we do day in and day out is ripe to be ridiculed. So lets get on with that ridicule, shall we?

USING THE WORK BATHROOM TIMELINE

Near collision with coworker while entering bathroom Small talk with boss who is waiting for a stall Stage fright The reason you came to the bathroom Making eye contact with people through the stall cracks Washing your hands extra long so you dont have to go back to your desk Near collision with coworker while exiting bathroom

EXPERIENCE REQUIRED

WHAT KIND OF OFFICE WORKER ARE YOU?

THE FIRST DAY OF A NEW JOB

# of things youre supposed to learn # of things you actually learn Novelty Coffees consumed Bathroom breaks Interest in going back tomorrow

CORPORATE LINGO TRANSLATOR

TERM: Salaried positionTRANSLATION: Youll work overtime but not earn overtimeTERM: Flexible lunchesTRANSLATION: Youll work at your desk over lunchTERM: Unlimited vacationTRANSLATION: No vacationTERM: Summer half-day FridaysTRANSLATION: Autumn full-day SaturdaysTERM: Unlimited breaksTRANSLATION: No breaksTERM: Company computer and phone