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Michael D. Subrizi - Lust Demented

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Michael D. Subrizi Lust Demented

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Every man, when he is quiet, when he becomes desperately honest with himself, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. There is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, only to discover what is already there.
- Henry Miller
Sexus: The Rosy Crucifixion
{I}

ITWASNT EASY TO RECOGNIZE Percy. On first glance, somebody had stabbed him several times, stuffing him with what looked like ritualistically chosen snippets of absurd literature. Pages placed inside him similar to the way a grandmother cut slices into a ham roast and stuffed garlic. Blood dried in branches of rosemary. Body crushed and crumbled on the splattered step.

What really made me gag were the mutilated pages. Books on the floor reduced to binding. Shelves torn from the walls. I fell into a sneezing fit trying to blow the stench of death out of the room. The exposed brick came alive with sinister people trapped within frames. Spotted up snapshots of Percys hanger-ons. Their cavernous eyes. Their glimmering fangs. Percy always bragged that he had a lot of enemies. He never once mentioned a friend.

One picture stood out from the rest. It was of Percy and Missy lounging together on a deserted beach. Clear ocean swallowed up by a curtain of depraved sky. Missy occupied another dimension, deep off in the starlet pose with everything overflowing. Percy appeared ancient, a mere bystander next to the dime piece.

Now I was a mere bystander outside of the frame still waiting for Missy to come in and scream. Nausea in waves

Freeze!

Lava will turn us all to stone. A hundred times more terrible than what happened in Italy or Iceland. Missy was beyond convinced that the world would end in the same place it began for her. A monk found her wandering the shores of Heavens Lake on Baekdu Mountain. He named her Eun Young.

It means Missy in English. It wasnt true. It means one who always gets luck and protection from the king.

On the ground! On the fucking ground! Squinting through the charcoal haze, the officers closed in with their weapons drawn. A stomach of earth. Im kissing the floor. Percys leaky corpse was staring me down. I couldnt make out the blurry fuzz. The cuffs were cold and tight on my wrists.

I didnt do this.

Maybe you didnt.

I did

What?

I did know them.

Whos them? I only see one body.

Curiosity awoken, the neighbors watched my heels skid to the patrol car taking sips from their tulip glasses. Scandals were common in this part of town. Crimes were rare.

Duck asshole! They reminded me a second late. I crumbled in the fetal position. The pigs floored it, only to slam the breaks. A few more times, a few more bruises. A trickling stream of brutal stop and go. The city was a self-absorbed amoeba. The ride couldnt have lasted shorter. No matter where you happened to be in NYC - a jail, hospital, or bank were only a few blocks away: The holy trinity of the modern age.

Down a hallway of echoes the muffled chatter of the human zoo not even placed in the cage for a hot second the slavemasters take me out to look me over not too interested not too thrilled a busy night in the neighborhood I want to plead innocence just cant raise my voice over all the others doing the same intimate confidants packing the pasture their smudgy windows leading to cunning ways out their sunken eyes accused their savage intentions glorified

A room opens up. A psycho exited grumbling, So the fuck what suck it incoherently possessed he tries to bite me I dont flinch I doubt he can bite me into a coffin go fuck yourself we make acquaintance now to look the cops in the eyes the two that led me into the cramped room the pale redhead cartoonish curves kung-fu swagger emerald marbles in the sockets the dark manslits squinting shoulders that widen door frames a warm inviting host of a voice.

Take a seat.

I closed my eyes letting them watch me reverberate in the echo of past voices. They knew I would rather listen to them talk. Missy was missing and maybe I knew and maybe I didnt. Either way theyre shaking the wrong tree for coconuts.

{II}

DARKNESSWAS THE WORLD I was no longer a part of. Sgt. Bethany Powers had the light in my face with a glare of scrutiny

Make any sense of this mess Farrow? She waited for me to break the silence.

Youre perfect except for the uniform.

Sgt. Bethany Powers smashed my face off the table. The room trembled. I was back on Roosevelt Avenue in Queens watching the trains pass each other in the night. Jumbo jets swept down from above. Everything moved around me in immediacy, but I stayed frozen: Just another dissolving hologram.

So Farrow what made you come into the city tonight? Her soothing voice took its sweet time slicing through the stale air.

I came for A Greater Truth . The severity of the situation was squandered. Squandered in years of writing rising from the concrete maze. Squandered in the mocking sky constantly caving in. Squandered in the sagging marshland bubbling to swallow me up.

Did you get it out of Percy before you carved into him? Their efforts to unwrap me, felt routine, unimportant.

I heard you were more than familiar with Percys wife, Missy.

His wife? Its been years.

Years?

Missy fucked me over. A years passed since Ive seen her.

A year almost to the day. Nice anniversary you planned. A dose of serum. I wondered where she got her information and how the hell it was so relevant and exact. After the fleecing Missy ran on me with the help of the lecherous high society literary czar Percy Featherton, I lost all concept of time. I had to lead the conversation into insignificance.

Its not my style to badmouth the black widow. None of this woulda ever happened if

What woulda never happened, Farrow Percy would still be alive?

We better not find Missy taking a dirt nap in your backyard.

I hope shes okay. I hope she gets everything

She deserves. Det. Anderson grimaced, patient and methodical.

I hope she gets everything she desires. Everything she thinks she needs. I used Missy. She used me. It usually went that way in love. The idea that she was in danger made me cringe, but the cops would do little to help. If anything, clarifying what they didnt know could only complicate the disaster.

How did Missy fuck you over Farrow? It seems to me she found a more successful man. A gentleman that adored her. A successful man that helped her gain the recognition that she deserved.

It seems if anyone did anything to anyone it was you Farrow. Tell me. Just how did Missy fuck you over? Sgt. Powers went after my insecurities. It made my blood simmer. I couldnt resist. I had to hear the words out loud.

Missy fucked me over by

Come with it.

Dont keep us waiting.

By stealing my book A Greater Truth !

Your book?

A Greater Truth ?

Yeah. Did you read it? An image of my books last passage brought a smile to my face. Either of you?

Actually to be completely honest, I feel like Im reading it as we speak. Sgt. Powers humored me, attempting to turn me inside out. But, I dont believe you wrote it. Not a fucking chance.

I dont believe you read it not a fucking chance. Our doubts appeared out of nowhere threatening to spread into a local plague popping up on the cankerous faces of the Grand Central commuter rush splotching over the skin of the staggering tourists drunk on Times Squares radioactive waves climbing out the scabrous loudmouths of bluebeasts in riot gear ducking flaming bottles.

Farrow, can you prove that you wrote it? Detective Anderson ended on a long pause, listening intently as if his life, not mine depended on it.

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