Annie Barrows - Ivy + Bean: No News Is Good News

Bean looked around the lunch table. Vanessa had it. She got it every day. Zuzu had it. Emma had it. Marga-Lee had it. Dusit and Eric had it. Even MacAdam had it. Everyone had it except Bean and Ivy.

While Bean watched, Vanessa opened her lunchbox and took out a small red ball. It was a ball of cheese, but nobody cared about the cheese. The cheese was totally unimportant. The important thing was the coating around the cheese. It was wax.

The wax was red. It was smooth. If you pulled on the secret string inside it, the wax split into two halves. You unfolded them and took the cheese out. Sometimes you took a bite of cheese. Mostly, you didnt. You rolled the wax between your hands until it was warm. Once it was warm, you could squish it. You could squish it and squish it. You could make it into a shape. You could put it on your face. You could hold it for the rest of the day, and it would get dirtier and dirtier, until finally it was a small brown lump. Then you could stick it in the middle of your table and say it was a booger.

Lookit, said Vanessa, rolling her wax. Im making a soccer ball.

Maybe Mom surprised me, Bean thought. Maybe she sneaked a cheese ball in my lunch for a special surprise. She peeked in her lunchbox. Nope.

Lookit, said Zuzu. She had made a little wax horn. Im a unicorn. She stuck it in the middle of her forehead.

Bean could grab the horn. She could grab it and run away with it and move to another country where she wouldnt get in trouble. She sighed.

Ivy poked her with an elbow. Pretend you dont care, she whispered.

Check this out, said Dusit. He stuck his wax underneath his nose so it looked like blood was dripping out. Ms. Aruba-Tates going to freak.

Bean turned to Eric, who was squishing his wax flat. Trade you my granola bar for your wax, she said. She waved the bar at him. Mmm! Granola!

He glanced at it. Yuck. Lookit. He stuck the wax over his eye. Do I look like a one-eye?

Why dont you put it in your ear? said Bean. Your mom will think your brains are dropping out. Thats what Bean would do.

No, said Eric. Im a one-eye.

Theyre called Cyclops, said Ivy.

Bean turned to MacAdam. How about a nice granola bar, MacAdam old buddy? Ill trade for your wax.

MacAdam shook his head. He held his red ball of cheese in front of his face and looked at it. Then he bit it. Bean watched him chew wax and cheese. When he swallowed, she had to look away. What a waste of wax.

Lookit, said Marga-Lee. She had made a mustache out of her wax.

Bean took a sad bite of granola bar. It was going to be a long lunch.

+ + + + + +

After school, Ivy and Bean slumped home. What a day, said Ivy.

Another day, another dollar, said Bean.

What does that mean? asked Ivy.

I dont know, Bean admitted. My mom says it sometimes.

We dont have a dollar, Ivy pointed out.

I know. Wish we did.

If we had a dollar, we could buy our own cheese balls.

Bean shook her head. No, we couldnt. They cost more than a dollar.

Ivy nodded. Heres what I dont understand. Everyone elses parents get them cheese. Why dont ours?

Weve got to keep trying, said Bean. Arent grown-ups always telling us we have to keep trying?

Together, they trudged around the circle of Pancake Court until they got to Beans house.

Hi, sweetie, said Beans mom. Hi, Ivy. How was school?

Fine, said Bean. The real answer was too complicated. Whats for snack?

Fruit! said Beans mom. She always said that.

Fruit, repeated Bean. We dont want fruit. We want cheese.

I dont want to hear about that cheese again, said Beans mom. Have some fruit.

Fruit tastes better with cheese, said Ivy.

Especially lowfat Belldeloon cheese in a special just-for-you serving size, said Bean. Lowfat Belldeloon cheese was the stuff inside the red wax.

Lowfat Belldeloon cheese in a special just-for-you serving size costs five dollars for six little bitty pieces of cheese, so if you want it, you can pay for it yourself, said Beans mom. She had said this several times before.

Cheese is good for you, said Bean. She had said this before, too.

Cheese is not good for you when it costs five dollars for six little bitty pieces, said Beans mom.

Wed eat more fruit if we had cheese to eat with it, said Bean.

I love fruit and cheese together, said Ivy.

Theres plenty of cheese in the fridge, said Beans mom.

Not lowfat Belldeloon cheese in a special just-for-you serving size, Bean reminded her.

I DONT WANT TO HEAR ONE MORE WORD ABOUT THAT CHEESE! yelled Beans mom, stomping out of the kitchen.

Shes so touchy sometimes, said Bean.

Ivy lowered her voice. Shed probably be in a better mood if she ate Ivy glanced at Bean and wiggled her eyebrows.

Lowfat Belldeloon cheese in a special just-for-you serving size, they whispered together.

Really, Ivy and Bean didnt want to hear one more word about cheese either. Words didnt seem to be getting them anywhere. Ivy had tried whispering Lowfat Belldeloon cheese in a special just-for-you serving size in her mothers ear in the middle of the night. Her mother was supposed to wake up in the morning wanting to buy cheese for Ivy. Instead, her mother woke up while Ivy was whispering and told her to get back to bed pronto.

Bean put a sticky note in her moms book. In her best and tiniest handwriting, she wrote, Belldeloon cheese is good! and stuck it over some other words. She figured if her mom read about Belldeloon cheese in a book, shed buy some for Bean. Instead, Beans mom told Bean to leave her books alone. It was tiring, trying to make parents do what they should.

After they had eaten their fruit (boring) and some peanut butter (not as boring, but still) and a little bit of brown sugar (yum!), Bean and Ivy played Eraser Valley. Bean had 56 erasers in different shapes. Most of them were animals, like bears and pigs, but she also had foods, like french fries and toast. Sometimes Ivy and Bean set up shops and restaurants and schools in Eraser Valley, and life was good for all the happy erasers. But mostly, Eraser Valley was disaster central. There were tsunamis and there were tornadoes. There were avalanches, earthquakes, and plagues. Eraser Valley had been through it all.

Bean and Ivy lined the erasers up and looked at them. What would befall Eraser Valley today?