Vince Powell - From Rags to Gags: The Memoirs of a Comedy Writer

Title Page

FROM RAGS TO GAGS

THE MEMOIRS OF A COMEDY WRITER

VINCE POWELL

Forewords by Cilla Black OBE & Barry Cryer OBE

Publisher Information

First published in 2008 by Apex Publishing Ltd

PO Box 7086, Clacton on Sea,

Essex, CO15 5WN, England

Digital Edition converted and published by Andrews UK Limited 2010

www.andrewsuk.com

Copyright 2008 by Vince Powell

The author has asserted his moral rights

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

All rights reserved. This book is sold subject to the condition, that no part of this book is to be reproduced, in any shape or form. Or by way of trade, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition, including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser, without prior permission of the copyright holder.

Production Manager: Chris Cowlin

Cover Design: Anthony Powell and Siobhan Smith

Dedication

For my children: Dominic, Genevieve & Anthony

FOREWORD BY CILLA BLACK OBE

Vince Powell is arguably one of Britain's top television comedy writers who has been responsible for creating and writing many popular and successful TV situation comedy series during the past 40 years.

His autobiography traces his rise from the back street of Manchester and his early struggles which led him to a glittering career during which he wrote a host of TV hits, most of which were rarely out of the top ten national TV ratings.

His list of credits reads like a history of television comedy, and his memoirs evoke many happy memories of that wonderful era, now referred to as the 'Golden Years of Comedy'.

I first met Vince when he became my Programme Associate for over a decade, working on 'Surprise Surprise', 'Blind Date' and many of my one hour TV Specials, during which time we became good friends in spite of him being a Manchester United supporter!

If, like me, you would like to recapture those nostalgic memories of the time when comedy reigned supreme, you will enjoy Vince's book, with its stories and anecdotes of the many famous celebrities who he has written for and worked with and his step by step rise to fame.

Cilla Black OBE

FOREWORD BY BARRY CRYER OBE

At last! The lid is off! Vince Powell was there and tells it how it happened. The Montgomery of comedy writing took on the Rommel of the ratings with shows that sparked controversy. A long career much of it with his partner, Harry Driver, a roller coaster of ribaldry, a ferris wheel of fun. If you ever wondered what went on behind the scenes of TV comedy, it's all here. Plus! Give us a clue, the long-running mime show that made a deafening impact with silence. Get this book early to avoid disappointment.

If you really want to know what a comedy writer's life is really like, it's all here, warts and all. And now and again, you'll remark "Oh, what a lovely wart". The detail is amazing and the self awareness is always there. Sit back, pour yourself a large glen close and enjoy!

Barry Cryer OBE

Acknowledgements

Thanks to all the talented actors and writers who have contributed to my success. Without your help this book could never been written.

To my dear friend Jack Ripley who spent hours researching the facts and even longer hours correcting my grammar and spelling mistakes.

And finally to my dear wife Geraldine who, for my sake, left her native home and family in Australia to share my life in England and encourage me through the many trials and tribulations familiar to all comedy writers.

Prologue

THE GOOD LIFE "Oh the good life Full of fun, seems to be the ideal Yes the good life Makes you hide all the sadness you feel"

The velvet voice of Tony Bennett at full volume echoed across the Esterel Massif from the car stereo as I drove my gold Rolls Bentley along the Moyenne Corniche, one of the three famous coastal routes of the French Riviera, a magnificent roadway which connects St Raphael to Menton. Sitting beside me taking in the wonderful scenery was my closest friend Anthony Parker, a Thames Television producer who had been responsible for producing and directing many of the successful television programmes which I had written. The sun shone down from a clear blue sky and sparkled and shimmered on the aquamarine waters of the Mediterranean Sea, glimpses of which we caught sight of with each bend of the road. We were on our way to the beautiful and picturesque former fishing village of St-Jean-Cap-Ferrat situated between Nice and Monaco.

Tony Bennett's words were so very apt that day and mirrored my mood exactly because awaiting me in St-Jean was a beautiful villa complete with four bedrooms each with an en-suite bathroom, a huge living room with French windows which opened on to a terrace leading to the garden and a swimming pool. Adjacent to the villa was a cottage in which lived Justa - a Spanish live-in femme de mnage housekeeper to you and her gardener husband, Manuel. For the next twelve months, Villa Solanam was to be home to my wife Judi, myself and our two year old son Dominic. No, I had not won the football pools, robbed a bank or been left a fortune in the will of an elderly relative. Believe it or not, my forthcoming sabbatical year was by courtesy of the Inland Revenue.

My writing partner, Harry Driver, with whom I had written for the past twenty years, had sadly finally succumbed to the polio virus which he had contracted in the great polio epidemic of 1957, and which had left him a quadriplegic, condemned to spend the rest of his life in a wheelchair and only able to move his head. At the time he passed away, we were both under an exclusive two year contract to Thames Television, as Comedy Advisers and Script Editors, plus a guarantee of writing thirteen situation comedies each year, which gave us an income of 25,000 a year each. After Harry died, I undertook to take on our joint contractual obligations which meant that my income virtually doubled. Very nice, you might think, and it would have been but for the fact that, with the top rate of Income Tax being an exorbitant 80 pence in the pound, I would be paying most of my earnings to the Inland Revenue. My accountant advised me that the only solution was to go and live abroad for an entire tax year April to April. This meant that, because I was self employed, I could fulfil my contractual obligations to Thames without being liable to pay any English tax on my earnings, while at the same time, if I went to live in France, I would be able to live there for a year before becoming liable to pay French tax. What a wonderful state of affairs!

Naturally, I didn't need telling twice. As soon as I could, I booked a flight to Nice, found a friendly estate agent and spent a wonderful three days being shown round several villas on the Cote d'Azur available to rent. I had been a devout Francophile ever since my first glimpse of the French Riviera many years ago when, serving in the Royal Navy on HMS Mauritius, we sailed into Villefranche-sur-Mer, and I fell in love with the South of France. (But more about that later in this book) When I left the Navy and could eventually afford to spend a holiday abroad, the first place I made for was Villefranche. And now, here I was, being given the glorious opportunity of living there for a year!

It didn't take me long to find a suitable villa, sign the necessary documents, and return home to arrange with a local estate agent for my house in Weybridge, Surrey to be put on his list of desirable properties to let. As it happened, before the agent had time to advertise the fact, a deal was done. The agent and I met in a local pub to discuss the letting contract over a drink, and our conversation was overhead by an American couple at a nearby table. They spoke to us; we took them to see my house and agreed a twelve month rental there and then. What luck!