Bailey West [West - Ezekiel’s Passion

From Blues Beauty

One day during one of our clothes swapping sessions in the bathroom, Zora informed me that she was leaving home as soon as high school was over. Shed received a scholarship to Columbia University in New York. She wanted to become an Oral Surgeon.

I havent told my parents because I dont want them to stop me.

How are you going to pay for your ticket to get there? I have money if you need it.

Thank you, but Ive saved up enough money from babysitting those bad ass kids at church to pay for a one-way ticket. I am going to stay in the dorms, and my scholarship will cover my tuition, room, and board. I just have to maintain my grades.

How will you get out of your house with your stuff?

I will bring stuff out slowly and keep it at your house. I dont have a lot there. Most of my stuff is at your house anyway. I just cant stay here any longer Nette. Im going to lose my mind if I have to continue to live with these people. Its justI hate church. I hate church people. I hate church stuff, and they are always making me do it. I just want to be able to experience life without them ruining it.

She let one tear fall and quickly wiped it away. She told me some things that she has experienced while living with her parents and she swore me to secrecy, so its her story to tell

The 4:45 am bus to New York City is now boarding at door number three, the muffled voice said over the intercom.

Thank goodness, I said to myself as I stood to collect my bag. I followed the other waiting passengers and formed a line at door number three.

Hey, Lil Momma, I heard a raspy voice say over my shoulder. I turned around hoping that it was not who I thought it was. Its him. He smiled at me displaying an open face gold tooth that was next to a spot in the front of his mouth where another tooth used to be. He looked like a Jack-o-lantern.

I saw him when he first came into the bus station. He looked like he was fresh out of the penas in penitentiary. He had on some high waisted stone washed jeans that were rolled at the bottom and tucked into his white slouch socks. He had on a windbreaker jacket with earth tone colored paisley print. Im figuring that was the style when he went up. No one told him that we have graduated from paisley jackets and stone washed jeans.

He sat across from me in the waiting area and kept looking at me. I made eye contact with him once, and he pulled his bottom lip between his teethwell, tooth. I named him Toothless.' I always make up names for people when I dont know their names or dont care to know their names. I felt uncomfortable under his glare, so I moved and sat closer to the guard station. I dont know how much help the security guard would have actually been since he seemed fascinated by a crossword puzzle he was working.

After realizing Toothless was standing behind me in line to board the bus, I looked into my bag and pretended like Id left something in my seat. I stood by my seat for a few minutes until I saw the line move then I stood back in line. I needed to make sure Toothless, and I wasn't sitting anywhere near each other.

The bus was somewhat full, but the seat directly behind the driver was still available. I chose that one. Toothless sat in the back of the bus.

The bus loaded its last passengers and pulled out of the station. The bus passed the Gateway Arch and crossed over the Mississippi River. I watched as we crossed the bridge into Illinois from Missouri indicating that Id actually done it. I left Saint Louis. More like escaped Saint Louis. I walked across the stage at my high school graduation, celebrated with my best friend, Zanetta, then I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I walked a couple of blocks and then called a cab to take me to the bus terminal. I probably should be nervous or scared, but Im not. I am just ready to be gone. In the last couple of weeks, things in my house had gone from bad to hell. I knew I had to leave.

No one knew my travel plans including Zanetta. I did tell her I was leaving but the less she knew, the better. I knew that Zanetta would be the first stop my parents made when they started looking for me. If they started looking for me. They may not care. Then again, they will look because they will want to save face in front of the church people. How bad would it look to the church folks if the Pastor and First Lady have no idea where their child is? Its all about image for them. They are only concerned with how things look. They could care less about how things really are.

I left a letter for my parents so they wouldnt think I was kidnapped.

Dear Mom and Dad,

I guess you know by now that I have left home. I couldnt stay any longer, and I didnt feel like you would understand my need to leave. I will be okay. I have a plan. God will protect me.

Love Zora

I didnt tell my parents that I was accepted to every college I had applied to. Nor did I announce that I had chosen Columbia University. I didnt think they would care, so I didnt share. I dont recall either of them asking me about my future plans. I believe that it was assumed I would stay in Saint Louis and find a job or go to a community college. How crazy is it that no one thought to ask me what my plans were? For a normal family it would be very crazy, but for my family, it waswhat it was.

My dysfunctional family consists of my dad, mom, and my three older brothers; Countee, Amiri, and Langston. Yes, they are all named after famous poets or authors. So am I. At some point, my parents read something other than the Bible. Im surprised my brothers names aren't: Moses, Noah, and Abraham. Then they would have named me Mary or Ruth. Thank goodness they stuck with the pattern and named me after a famous black author also. It never occurred to me to ask why they chose our names. Those werent the types of conversations we had in my family. We really didnt have any types of conversations in my family. Outsiders probably looked at us and thought we were the Cleavers or the Huxtables. They had no idea what we were really like.

My dad is the Pastor of Pool of Siloam Church in Saint Louis, Missouri. When I tell you that his passion is that church, I mean it. I think he loves it more than he ever loved anything or anyone including his family. Certainly, more than he loved me. He spends all of his free time either at the church or doing church stuff like preparing his sermon, listening to church on the radio or watching church on TV. I dont ever remember a time when he was around long enough to actually know what was going on in my life. He wasnt at any of my honor roll award ceremonies or any of my parent/teacher conferences. Oh, but let Sister So-and-So from the church have an ingrown toenail! He would go to wherever she was, pleading the blood of Jesus over her raggedy ass feet, until she thought she felt better. Let Brother So-and-So be in the hospital, Reverend Chambers would be the first visitor on the list. He would show up with his Bible and his blessed oil all ready to grease that mans forehead. He cared for everyone else, but not for his family.