J. Souders - Revelations

PATIENT EVELYN WINTERS: Female. Approximately 16 Years of age.

Patient still displays signs of amnesia. Evaluation shows worsening fevers, syncope, failure to heal from multiple wounds and infection of said wounds. Patient has failed to respond to standard treatment. Recommended course of action has met with refusal by patients significant other. No next of kin available. Unsure of patients ability to consent for herself due to diminished mental faculties.

MEDICAL RECORD LOG, DR. DANIEL GILLIAN, MD

Evie

My life is just about perfect.

At least I think it is. Its hard to be sure since I cant remember anything from the last sixteen years. My hopes. My dreams. Everything. Gone. As if they never existed. And I will probably never get them back.

It hurts just thinking about it, so I try not to, but the thought festers in my mind as I sit on the beach by the waters edge and push my bare feet into the surf. The waves lap at my ankles as I dig my toes into the sand. It feels goodthe chilly water against my heated flesh.

I just know Im running another fever. Im never not, lately. I scratch at my healing shoulder before remembering myself and shoving my hands into the cool sand. Its only been a few days since my release from the confines of the local medical facilityId been there just a few weeks, but itd felt like forever. Dr. Gillian said, despite the failure of the wound on my shoulder to heal completely, I was healthy enough to leave. Im not convinced he actually thinks thats true, but hes done so much for me since I got here, he almost feels like family. Or I think so anyway. I dont really remember what family feels like. But, anyway, hes done so much for me, Dr. Gillian, that I could hardly refuse, and even though I wasnt at all sure I was ready to leave the hospital, Gavin was impatient to get me home.

Home. Another pang of something I cant really describe hits me, and tears well in my eyes. I trace my fingers over the etched lines of the silver rose pendant lying between my breasts. I really, really want to go home, I know that. I just dont know exactly where home is.

Gavins dog, Lucy, bumps my shoulder with her head, whining softly. I dig my fingers into her soft fur, staring into the water until the tears that sting my eyes are from the sun sparkling on the surface. Even at sunset, the solar rays are still intense to my eyes, but a bit of my bad mood slips away. Its beautiful today, as it always is, the sky flickering now with the oranges, reds, and pinks of the setting sun.

This is my favorite time of day. When the sun is setting and the last of its fiery fingers caress the water line before relinquishing their hold to the darkness of night. And I can watch as the stars pop out, one by one, to pinprick the sky with their silvery light. The breakers crash against the shore in a steady rhythm. Its lovely. Peaceful. Calming. Like somewhere else I used to know.

Home, I think again, holding the pendant tightly in my fist. Gavin tells me I came from beneath those waves. But I dont know if home is really there. At the bottom of the sea in a place I cant remember and Im not sure if I want to. Or if its with Gavin and his wonderful family: His brother, Tristan, and all his chattering and curiosity. His sister, Ann Marie, with her easy happiness, and his mom, whose quiet strengththe same strength Gavin has in spadesresonates from her in waves.

Ill admit, when theyre around, its easy to forget that I havent always been here. That I havent always been a part of their family. But still, I know I dont really belong. Im not sure I belong anywhere.

That thought making my heart squeeze, I push up from the sand, click my tongue so Lucy will follow, and go back into the house Im supposed to consider my home.

Gavin

The bucket of tallow oil weighs heavy in my hand as I drag it up the two hundred and thirteen steps to the lantern room. I dont suppose we really have to light the lamp anymore, but its become a custom. My family has kept the lighthouse going since the War. Using the light not to guide ships, but people.

It was one of the few buildings left standing after everything, but our cove was still in better shape than a lot of places. More importantly, it was safefrom raiders and starving animalsdue to the coast on three sides and the wall theyd built around the town. My ancestors had hoped to guide those lost in what is now known as the Outlands to the safety of our town. I dont know if my family always lived here or if we took it over when we came across it, but weve been here ever since. No one new has come in ages, not since the mayor was sent from the city to keep an eye on us, but we still make the tallow and light the lantern every night. Just in case.

Its technically Tristans jobever since I started spending all my time hunting and providing food for the familybut he has a hard time dragging the bucket all the way to the top, and anyway I dont mind doing it. The mindless repetition of dragging the oil to the top, pouring it into the lamp, winding the clockwork, and lighting it usually gives me some much needed thinking time.

Today, though, Im just going to enjoy the view. I can see Evie down on the beach, and now that shes with me after being in the hospital for way too long, I just want to bask a little. Even though Ive been back on the surface for a little over a month, I cant get over how grateful I am to be home. My mind still reels thinking of what Iwewent through. Genetic mutations. Brainwashing. A beautiful princess needing rescuing. Okay, that parts not true. She rescued me. I just decided I couldnt leave without her.

A smile curves my lips as I glance down over the rail. Far below, the light from behind me shines on her blond head, then continues on its way. She was the only shining light from that hell.

But its hard to be happy looking at her now. I can tell from how shes holding on to Lucy that shes unhappy, and considering the way shes staring out into the water, I cant pretend I dont know the reason. Shes homesick. Even if home is the last word Id use to describe Elysium.

Hell. Living nightmare. Bottomless pit of everlasting tortures. Those descriptions would fit it a lot better, but its not like she remembers what really happened. She didnt even want to leave until she was forced to. By me. No, scratch that. Because of me. Because shed risked her life to rescue me. And it had cost her much more than either of us had anticipated.

I watch, leaning over the rail, as she gets up and walks into the house, Lucy prancing by her side. She never once looks up at me, though Im sure she knows Im up here. Not sure if I should feel stung or just let her be; after all, I should know better than anyone how difficult it is to feel lost in a world thats not yours with no one you know or trust. And while I know she cares for me, ever since she left the hospital theres been this awkwardness between us. Like neither of us quite knows what to do with the other now that its safe for us to touch.

Huffing a sigh, I turn to pick up the now empty bucket, then make my way down the stairs. Its much easier with gravity and an empty bucket on my side.

Taking my time, I put the supplies back into the fuel room, then clean up the already meticulous space. When I finally admit to myself that I cant get it any cleaner than it already is, I wander into the house.

Its quiet, as it usually is after supper, except for the sounds of Tristan playing in his room, making sound effects from whatever toys hes deemed worthy of his time. Mom must have nixed unplugging the water heater for him to play video games for today. Good, because Im filthy. I glance down at my sooty hands and arms. I need a shower. Besides, I have to pass Evies room along the way to the bathroom. Itll give me the perfect excuse to check on her.