Cox - Shiny Happy Person: Finding the Sun Between Clouds of Depression

Adam Shaw, a mental illness survivor and mental health advocate, and Lauren Callaghan, an industry-leading clinical psychologist, are the founders of the global mental health publishing enterprise, Pullingthetrigger. With their TV appearances and global education programmes, Adam, Lauren and their amazing team are helping more people around the world understand, recover from, and talk about their mental health issues.

The Pullingthetrigger range user-friendly self-help books with an innovative approach to supporting people recovering from mental health issues.

TheinspirationalseriesTM remarkable, real-life stories of men and women who have overcome mental illness to lead fulfilling lives.

Why have we called our booksPullingthetrigger?

Many things can trigger mental health issues. So what do you do if something makes you feel bad? You stay away from it, right?

I bet youve been avoiding your triggers all your life. But now we know that avoiding them only makes things worse. So heres the game changer: you need to learn how to pull those triggers instead of running away from them and our Pullingthetrigger series shows you how. Your recovery is within reach, we promise.

This is more than recovery, its a way of life.

Adam Shaw & Lauren Callaghan.

First published in Great Britain 2017 by Trigger Press

Trigger Press is a trading style of Shaw Callaghan Ltd & Shaw Callaghan 23 USA, INC.

The Foundation Centre
Navigation House, 48 Millgate, Newark
Nottinghamshire NG24 4TS UK

www.trigger-press.com

Copyright Terri Cox 2017

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission in writing from the publisher

British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available upon request from the British Library

ISBN: 978-1-911246-45-9

This book is also available in the following e-Book formats:

MOBI: 978-1-911246-48-0

EPUB: 978-1-911246-46-6

PDF: 978-1-911246-47-3

Terri Cox has asserted her right under the Copyright, Design and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work

Cover design and typeset by Fusion Graphic Design Ltd

Project Management by Out of House Publishing

Printed and bound in Great Britain by Bell & Bain, Glasgow

Paper from responsible sources

Thank you for purchasing this book. You are making an incredible difference.

All of TheinspirationalseriesTM products have substantial enterprising and philanthropic value and generate proceeds that contribute towards our global mental health charity, The Shaw Mind Foundation

MISSION STATEMENT

We aim to bring to an end the suffering and despair caused by mental health issues. Our goal is to make help and support available for every single person in society, from all walks of life. We will never stop offering hope. These are our promises.

Pulling the Trigger and The Shaw Mind Foundation

The Shaw Mind Foundation (www.shawmindfoundation.org) offers unconditional support for all who are affected by mental health issues. We are a global foundation that is not for profit. Our core ethos is to help those with mental health issues and their families at the point of need. We also continue to run and invest in mental health treatment approaches in local communities around the globe, which support those from the most vulnerable and socially deprived areas of society. Please join us and help us make an incredible difference to those who are suffering with mental health issues. #letsdostuff.

To all my superheroes.

CONTENTS

Disclaimer: Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals.

PROLOGUE

Its Saturday August 17th, 2013, about 9.00pm. Im in a Wetherspoons pub on a night out that Ive been looking forward to for a good few weeks. Its the weekend after my 23rd birthday, and I am going to celebrate by dancing, laughing too much, and enjoying the sweet chemical taste of cheap drinks. My friends have gathered; Im wearing a pretty black jump suit with yellow flowers. To me, its beautiful. Ive just lost three stone and even though I will eventually have to lose another three, I still feel like hot stuff. The jump suit was a lucky accidental find, and having been taken in by vanity sizing, Im sporting a size 14. The matching shoes only took a six-hour shopping trip to find.

I pop to the bar. Hordes of twenty-somethings cram in like sardines to get in on the 2-for-10 cocktail pitcher deal. I buy a questionable drink thats meant to be like an alcoholic Vimto. I pay, pick up my pitcher, turn in my tracks, and take a few steps forward towards the throng.

Heres what this moment reminds me of. In the Harry Potter books (yes, Im one of those devout fans) there is a moment where Harry is rapped on the head with someones wand, in order to be turned invisible. A strange feeling spreads downwards as if someone has smashed an egg on his head and its running down his body. Only for me, the feeling is nasty and cold. Its a feeling that goes to my chest, grips my heart and stops me in my tracks for a couple of seconds. Brief, but paralysing.

An overwhelming feeling of what is the point? descends.

It disappears almost as soon as it appears. But I am left with a sense of confusion that lingers for days.

CHAPTER 1

BEGIN THE BEGIN

In most ways, Im a normal woman. My name is Terri and at the time of writing, I am 26-years-old. I have a boyfriend and a job I enjoy. I have friends and a family that I love, and I live in a great little flat.

So why am I writing a book? And why should it be of any interest to anyone?

The simple answer is: Im writing this because I am normal. I have suffered with depression, and thats normal. Mental illness isnt okay but, unfortunately, it is common.

Just as there are thousands of illnesses and diseases that exist in the human body, so there are several illnesses of the mind. 1 in 6 people suffered from mental health in the last week. We shouldnt be surprised about this. Given what Ive been through, I shouldnt be surprised by it. But I am.

The problem is that mental illness is frequently invisible. As my mother always says to me you can see a broken arm, it cant be hidden. If you see someone bruised and bloodied after falling in the street, you rush to help them. If somebody walks in with their arm in a cast, you immediately sympathise and ask how they are. But you cant always see the effects of a poorly mind.

Before I had one, I didnt even know what a breakdown was. It was something I occasionally heard about if there was someone brave enough to tell me theyd had one, but honestly, nobody had ever described it to me in detail. And I didnt ask for details. Its not the accepted etiquette to ask someone why they had a breakdown. Its not seen as polite. But I wouldnt think twice about asking somebody how they broke a bone. I would even laugh along with them when they told me their exaggerated story of how it happened.