Lucinda Ruh - Frozen teardrop: the tragedy and triumph of figure skatings queen of spin

I have lived a privileged life in all the landscapes of my life. I was born into an incredibly loving family and blossomed into a world-class figure skater. I became famous for creating, designing, and performing the fastest and most creative spins in the world on ice, and I am still recognized today by The Guinness Book of World Records as the worlds longest spinner on ice, and known in the skating community and around the world as the fastest and most creative spinner in the history of ice skating. I am profoundly grateful for the life I have lived and live today, and for everyone who supported me to mold me to become who I am. But much of my story has gone untold and much of my struggle and even my achievements have been kept from the public view. This book is my humble attempt to silence the demons and free the angels. I am hopeful that it will empower others to build on my victories while sparing them my costly mistakes. Most of all, this book is my thank-you to my parents for their undying love for me.

My affinity for loving to spin and loving to feel the freedom of continuous rotation came naturally to me from a very tender age, although a great deal of determination, sacrifice, and unforgiving and unrelenting hard work had to become the main priority in my life for me to be able to reach my ultimate magic on ice. Spinning became my passion, my love, my meditation, and my doorway to internal bliss. It was trance-inducing and provided me with something to focus upon and seek refuge in when other parts of my life became frightening, chaotic, lonely, or confusing. It took me away from the harshness of reality and what became the unwanted riches of my world. It allowed me to soar with the angels, at least for a time, and be whatever I wanted to be without those limitations and fears that can overpower and frighten a person of any age. It is known that I have traveled the world and have lived in a multitude of cultures in numerous countries with celebrities and government leaders welcoming me into their lives, but why and how this all surrounded me has eluded the public. It has been a wonderful journey that became more beautiful to me as I entered womanhood, and Im grateful for all the memories and accolades that came with my experience. I am especially grateful for the friendships and the loyal fan support I continue to receive and that I try my best to honor. Throughout all the places I have lived, trained, toured, and sometimes just wandered, I have never forgotten the people who helped me in my hours of need. I never forgot those who loved me when I had difficulty loving myself, and I never forgot those who faithfully cheered me on while I wrestled with parts of myself they were never permitted to see.

This book, of course, is about more than skating, even though I address my skating development in full detail to honor those expecting a skating story and because skating is so fundamental to who I am and who I have become. Though presented through a skaters perspective, it is first and foremost a book about living, loving, and surviving in a world of increasing diversity and tolerance that, ironically, seems only to perpetuate with greater fervor the prejudices, battles, and mistakes of ages past. A lifetime would seem of little value to me if we learned nothing from it and passed nothing on to others. This book is my attempt to pass on what I have learned.

Frozen Teardrop is my story presented to the world in the hope that others might share in the successes I have known and learn from the mistakes I have made in order to allow others to reach even greater heights of success. It is a book intended for people of all ages, backgrounds, and interests, but it is written especially for the lonely, the lost, the frightened, and the abused who want to heal and have a new opportunity for a better life. Most importantly this is for those who have not realized that they are loved and do not recognize real love. I live to assure you that life is worth living whatever its challenges, fears, disappointments, and humiliations. Its worth facing. Its worth doing. Its worth honoring. This book is my promise of these things to you. It is worth living as you are, and to be with those who love you with no bottom to their heart.

The image for which I am known is a true one. The spins were real, the skating was real, and all the pageantry, glamour, and celebrity were real. The smiles, sometimes, were not real. Many parts of my life were never exposed or admitted to even in my own mind. Most of my fans never knew what I endured behind the scenes or what I inflicted upon myself in my determination to make others proud of me. From eating too little, exercising too much, isolating myself from nearly everyone and everything, enduring both physical and mental abuse, becoming very sick and debilitated, to finally realizing how much I am loved, I learned the hard way that life is fragile, and that we can cheat our own self when we demand too much from ourselves, from others, and purely from life itself. Very few knew how close to death I came but now all can know how and why I decided to live. It is my hope and prayer that you will also choose to live and live abundantly.

This is a story of becoming a champion in life while achieving your dreams without ever losing your self, your self-worth, or your self-respect.