Lala Kent - Give Them Lala

LALA KENT

Give Them Lala

Gallery Books

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Copyright 2021 by Pitty Pablo, Inc.

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First Gallery Books hardcover edition May 2021

Some names have been changed, whether or not so noted in the text.

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Interior design by Davina Mock-Maniscalco

Jacket art direction and design by John Vairo Jr.

Jacket photographs by Koury Angelo

Wardrobe styling by Alexandra Scott

Hairstyling by Trace Henningsen

Makeup by Marine Muradyan

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Kent, Lala, author.

Title: Give them Lala / Lala Kent.

Identifiers: LCCN 2020043649 (print) | LCCN 2020043650 (ebook) | ISBN 9781982153847 (hardcover) | ISBN 9781982153854 (trade paperback) | ISBN 9781982153861 (ebook)

Subjects: LCSH: Kent, Lala. | Vanderpump rules (Television program) | Women television personalitiesUnited StatesBiography. | Women alcoholicsUnited StatesBiography. | Reality television programsUnited States.

Classification: LCC PN1992.4.K474 A3 2021 (print) | LCC PN1992.4.K474 (ebook) | DDC 791.4302/8/092 [B]dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020043649

LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020043650

ISBN 978-1-9821-5384-7

ISBN 978-1-9821-5386-1 (ebook)

This book is dedicated to those courageous enough to be themselves.

W HEN I FIRST STARTED using the phrase Give them Lala, I was describing who Lauren Burningham, a girl from Salt Lake City, Utah, turned into when she was in front of the cameras on Vanderpump Rules. Unlike Lauren, Lala was confident, badass, and always did exactly what she wanted, for better or for worse often worse, at least during my early seasons on the show.

Life moved fast after I entered the world of reality TV, and sometimes its been hard for me to make sense of the present moment, let alone the past. Eventually, I reached a point where I had no choice but to stop, sit down with pen and paper, and take a long, hard look at myself. Lala made for good TV, thats for sure, but she was taking Lauren down some questionable paths. I needed to understand why.

As a recovering addict working a program that continues to save my life, Ive learned the importance of sharing the most vulnerable parts of myself with the people I lovemy beloved family, my life partner, my fellow warriors in AA, and you, the fans. With your help, Give them Lala has evolved into something I can be proud of. And today, its a reminder for me to never play a role and to always be the realest version of me, because the alternative leads to disaster.

So, here, I give you Lala. The real Lala, all of her, the good, the bad, and the ridiculous. There are things in these pages that even those closest to me do not know. I know the haters will continue to hate whatever I say or do, but thats okayIm opening up the contents of my heart anyway. Some names have been changed to protect the innocent and the not-so-innocent, and sorry not sorry to anyone I may offend along the way.

Love,

Lala

H AVE YOU EVER BEEN slut-shamed? Ever been told your sexuality is offensive by someone who has no right to comment on it? Has anyone ever made a judgment call based on the way you dress, or the things you say? Have you ever been told to act like a lady, even though if we acted like the ladies those people wanted us to be wed still be churning butter at home, waiting for a man to walk through the door? If so, you know how much it sucks to be on the receiving end of those judgments, by-products of a sexist narrative that has been shoved down our throats since we were little.

Ive been judged and slut-shamed in a very public way, and never more so than when I was twenty-three, going through a period I call my ho phase, which was working out perfectly until the cameras got involved. A chunk of my ho-ness overlapped with my first season of filming Vanderpump Rules, meaning millions of people witnessed me living my very best-worst lifedrunk, messy, and down for whatever. Take it from me, a ladys most shameless moments are much easier when they happen in private.

In case youre wondering, a ho phase goes a little something like this. Youre at a club. Youre feeling good. You see someone who gives you those kind of feels. You make eye contact, you start vibing, and suddenly you feel all happy down there. That is your body, calling them. Before long, the nips want a little attention; youre kissing and touching, and boom, its like David Attenborough, mating-season-in-the-wild-type lovin. Ideally the person youre about to bump pee-pees with is a friend, or a friend of a friend, because I dont condone slipping off with a stranger and having sex with them. Be smart, be safe, and feel free to never deny yourself a good layI didnt. When I was ho-phasing, if I was attracted to him and we were vibing, it was going down.

There is no such thing as being too old to go through this phase, by the way. There are women I know who married young and are experiencing a ho phase for the first time, in their forties, which I love. I know some women who have had more than one ho phase, which is wonderful, too. Theres no right or wrong time to do it, although one advantage of being sexually free in your twenties is that it allows you to really figure out what you like and what you dont like, relatively early on in the game. Then, when you meet someone youre compatible with, youll know.

To this day, I look back on my ho phase as a period of major growth. It gave me confidence; it helped me release a relationship I had been desperately hanging on to; it gave me a power that every woman should experience. Most of all, my ho phase was the bridge to the happy home I share with my soul mate, Randall, whose last name I cannot wait to share. In many ways, ho-ing really is the path to enlightenment.

Even so, ho-phasing can be challenging. Hearts get broken, feelings get burned, and lines get blurred. You might start second-guessing yourself, or worrying what other people think. You do run the high risk of being judged and slut-shamed when youre a woman whos sexually free because, unfortunately, thats just how our society works, and it sucks. People judge women more harshly than they judge men, and at times, you may even find youre judging yourself.

If you start feeling this way, disengage. Take a time-out and reflect. If ho-phasing no longer feels right, maybe its because youve reached the end of your phase, or maybe ho-phasing wasnt really meant for you at all. I know many girls in Salt Lake who are naturally wholesome, who never needed to explore their sexuality with multiple partners. But if youre like me, then maybe you like experimenting maybe youve gotten drunk, and maybe youve eaten a cookie or two Just know I love you, and there is no judgment here, ever. Do you, boo. Just maybe dont do it on TV, like I did.