Table of Contents
Part I: But First I Was Born
1. My Fort
2. Exile on the Red
3. Rock n Roll is a Vicious Game
4. Away
5. Sleeping on the Job
6. Having to Get Married
7. At the Bar
8. The Elijah Factor
Part II: Back to Broadway
9. Knock Knock
10. Windbag
11. My Really Unbiased View
12. Premier Potboiler
Part III: Laws and Guffaws
13. Mr. Minister
14. Piss n Vinegar
15. Tail, Nail, and Jail
16. Headlines and Head Lines
17. Anyone Want to Buy a Courthouse?
18. 4,000-pound Bullets
19. Northern Rights
20. Redux
Part IV: Family Guy
21. Little Miracles
22. The Highest Calling
23. All Aboard!
24. Lets Make a Deal
Part V: Conversation Minister
25. Machines Again!
26. My Wild Life
27. Polar Bear Alert
28. HO HQ
29. Get Out!
Part VI: Foot Soldier
30. PST Off
31. Rrrrip!
32. Closing Time
33. Glad that I Ran Into You
34. Footprints
Index
Preface
credit: Andrew Sikorsky
skinny, dark-haired guy
My first election victory speech began with sombre delivery and pause between each phrase. I told the assembled, Over the course of this campaign, never, yes never, not once, not so much as even once, after all the doors Ive been towas I bitten by a dog. The campaign team worked awfully hard and invested a lot of personal time in the election effort. There were high expectations about my incumbency and serious issues to tackle. At this moment, they surely asked themselves, Who the heck did we just send to the Legislature?
Immediately after the speech, a supporter said, Gord, just dont screw up. Thats a send-off. But I admit I have screwed up, every day, and thats taught me a lot. The guy on the Number 18 bus said I should share those lessons, the ones that make me look like a loser.
There are also shocking or embarrassing incidents that have now strangely ripened into humour. While it wasnt funny then, thats changed with time. Its a universal metamorphosis. The Boss sings about it in Rosalita: Someday well look back on this and it will all seem funny. Why this happens, I dont know. Maybe its called perspective. Events like that should be shared too. Therapists agree.
I was happier and therefore more effective with lots of humour. While risking cheap shots from detractors who say you dont take serious issues seriously, and for sure at one of those sombre NDP gatherings where a procedural point of order is what picks them up, its worth it. It can make a point in the strongest way. It balances out the drama and relieves the pressure. I thrived during difficult times with a chuckle. No matter how bleak a day may seem, a laugh is lurking if you seek it. Like listening for the birds or looking for the flowers.
Not every Member has a sense of humour of course and thats too bad. Jerry Storie recalls that during a lengthy meeting of a standing committee, he asked for a ten-minute break. He explained, Theres something I just gotta do. The earnest Charlie Birt chimed in, Yeah, I have to do the same thing. Jerry asked, You have to call my wife? Charlies eyes bulged, he gasped and said, Oh, no, not, I meant, you know. No !
Dave Chomiak, one of the greatest MLAs to have served and the conscience of the NDP caucus, embraced levity. We were in the small caucus laugh-wing. When times were tough he told a bad joke or stuck something on his nose. Another shtick of Daves is revealed by his special assistants plea when he was Health Minister: Its really hard having a conversation, Dave, with you under the desk like that. I had to use this phrase myself in November 2015 when Dave disappeared before my eyes during a conversation about the future of the Selinger government. Another time, staff arrived at Daves office for a meeting and seeing the office was empty, an advisor announced, Oh, the Ministers not here yet. From the direction of Daves desk, a voice said, Over here. Ive got stories.
Labour and Immigration Minister Erna Braun said to me, You are the most mischievous person I know. To a dignified deacon like Erna, that might mean I once wore my glasses upside down. But I confess to misplaced mischief, playful funny business. Some of the incidents with no measurable damage should also be shared. My lawyer friend said I should focus on lessons in parliamentary democracy.
I was certainly there for the big lessons in parliamentary democracy. I was behind the scenes and wearing different hats as Deputy Clerk of the Legislature, lawyer, MLA and minister during The Wilson Affair Manitobas only expulsion of an MLA, The French Language Crisis the ugly battle that killed both negotiations for French language services and the provinces longest session, The Meech Lake Crisis the Indigenous political strategy that nixed a national effort to gain Quebec support for the constitution, the ill-fated Charlottetown Accord, The MTS Debate the fight against the privatization of Manitobas telephone system, The Vote-Rigging Scandal the Filmon governments conspiracy to split the vote and win election by organizing an Indigenous splinter campaign, The Flood of the Century, The Auto Theft Epidemic and the partnership that defeated North Americas worst auto theft rate, The Murder Capital of Canada and the difficult effort to counter Canadas highest violent crime rate, the historic struggle for same-sex equality rights, the plan to combat a heart-breaking Crisis in Child Welfare, Manitobas comprehensive environment strategy, work to improve The Worlds Most Threatened Lake, and Rrrip ! the divisive end to Canadas second-longest running NDP government.
