Flip Flippen - Your Third Story: Author the Life You Were Meant to Live

YOUR
THIRD
STORY

Author The Life You
Were Meant To Live

FLIP FLIPPEN & DR. CHRIS J WHITE

YOUR THIRD STORY

AUTHOR THE LIFE YOUWERE MEANT TO LIVE

Copyright 2019 The Flippen Group.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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ISBN: 978-1-5320-7801-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5320-7804-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2019909026

iUniverse rev. date: 07/19/2019

CONTENTS

To Susan and Jenn ifer

Everyone who has written on us is a part of this book, so we want to offer a broad we couldnt have done it without you to those who wrote valuable things on us. To those who wrote imperfectly on us, we thank you too. You made us stronger and you are in good company because we are imperfect writers, ourselves.

We want to give a special thank you to some of the individuals who not only wrote on our lives but also, literally, wrote on this book. The amazing collection of talent that is The Flippen Group, in focus groups and individual conversations, helped identify weaknesses and insist on clarity. Foremost among them were Joy Chmelar, Karen Gorski, Sean Murphy, Kate Cirillo, Michael Cody, Leah Sequeira, Meredith King, and Julie Gorski.

Our primary editorsCraig Bird, Joe Terrell, and Margie Lightseyplayed a huge role in the art of communication and in making the content come alive.

The production and promotion team, Susan Flippen and Tanya Peterson, helped make sure this book wasnt just read by our friends and family.

Finally, as men who gratefully acknowledge the gift of incredible wives and great families, we express from the depths of our souls and hearts appreciation to Susan Flippen and Jennifer White for being the greatest writers we ever could have wanted and needed. Our lives, our children, our homes, and these pages are filled with your love and sacrifice.

CHAPTER 1

INTRODUCTION:
THE BACK STORY

The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide t o be.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

This book is personal for me. More personal, perhaps, than I have ever admitted to myself or anyone else. As I write this, I am sitting in New York for meetings with several top business people in the financial world. And next week I head to Africa to work on a conservation program relocating giraffes, rhinos, and lions.

Its fun to celebrate a life filled with joy and fulfillment. But for me, there have also been dark and dismal times.

It was almost 5:00 p.m. on December 24 many years ago; a stormy day of sleet and rainthat miserable in between weather a Texas winter can produce at a moments notice.

My young son, Micah, and I were finishing some Christmas shopping, and I swung by my office to meet briefly with a few of my board members before the year came to an end.

In the non-profit world, the organization I had founded 16 years prior was highly respected and successful. It was one of the few free outpatient mental health clinics in the South. Our large clinical staff cared for hundreds of patients each month. We also ran high adventure programs for kids from across all spectrums of life, as well as clinical training programs for up-and-coming therapists. I loved every minute of it.

Its hard to describe the immense satisfaction I felt whenever I looked at the team I had enlisted to join arms with me in making a real difference.

Those feelings stopped on that day in December.

Three of my board members abruptly informed me I was being terminated, effective immediately. Your mind does such interesting things in such moments.

Why? What in the world is happening? I appointed you to the boardcan you even do this?

In the midst of my shock, I asked if this was a joke. It wasnt.

They offered no explanation other than that they had agreed to never discuss it with anyone, including spouses and me. No reason, nothing other than a small severance and a request that they be allowed to host a party to celebrate all you have done for the community as you go on to what you will do next.

Stunned, I asked, Am I supposed to go to a party when I dont even know what is happening? Silently I wondered, How can I do that? Am I expected to be duplicitous about all of this?

Then they insisted, Please agree not to discuss what is happening, as we dont want to hurt our organization. All I could think was, Its not your organization. You didnt build it. Why would I ever hurt the company I built? Is this really happe ning?

The meeting lasted about five minutes. My life changed forever.

I walked out of what had been my office and said goodbye to my secretaryBarbara Knowlesand took Micah to finish his Christmas shopping. I didnt tell either of them what had just transpired.

We got home as night fell and I donned my bad weather gear for a much-needed walk down the country road where we lived. Eventually, I crawled through a fence, went deeper into the woods, sat down against a huge oak tree in a sleet stormand wept.

I cried until I could catch my breath and then quietly sobbed as the questions flooded over me: What will I do? How will we live? Can I take care of my family? What will people think of me? Whats next?

Then I cried some more.

As lightning flashed, I saw a large tree across an open area. I noticed it was dying because a pipeline easement had been cut too close to it. The thought of that old tree dying unleashed another huge wave of sadness and more tears. Dear God, why is this happening? I dont understand. What have I done?

Then I realized something I knew deep within me. That tree was a victim; it had been killed by something over which it had no control. That tree was a victim, but I was not!

I still had more days to come and I had children that needed me. I had choices and I had things no one could take away from me. I had my character, my integrity, my experiences, my life, my children, my abilities, and my friends.

One dear friend, David Shellenberger, was a great help through it all, literally giving me the clothes off his back. We need each other, dont we? Life is tough when we face it alone, so why face it alone? There are others who walk the same path, so lets walk it with courage and hope and forgiveness.

Days later, a front-page article gushed about the organization and all we had accomplished. It said I was leaving with great plans for the future (unknown to me, of course). It was a kind article and scores of people congratulated me on my future. I felt conflicted.

A few months after my termination, Barbara joined me as executive assistant in my counseling practice and several months after that, the board learned they had made a mistake based on incorrect information. I still had to rebuild my life, but I have no regrets nor any bitterness toward them. It took a while, but I laid those thoughts down. Its difficult to walk into the future with a heavy load on your back.