Nahla Summers - The Accidental Adventurer

THE ACCIDENTAL ADVENTURER

By Nahla Summers

The events and conversations in this book have been set down to the best of the authors ability, although some names and details have been changed. We can guarantee that all events described actually happened, though on occasion the author has taken a rough summary of what was said in conversations, because quite frankly, it is set over 10 years, no ones memory is that good!

Copyright Nahla Summers, 2021

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form on by an electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review.

Book cover by Nichola Stones

ISBN 978-1-7398354-0-8

www.nahlasummers.com

This is dedicated to you, the reader of this book.

I hope when you finish it, you will understand why.

There are moments when I wish I could roll back the clock and take all the sadness away, but I have the feeling that if I did, the joy would be gone as well.
Nicholas Sparks, A Walk to Remember

I woke to my heart beating so fast I thought I would lose my breath forever. Eyes wide and breath rasping, I was overwhelmed by a feeling of impending doom. Maybe I would fail? Was I just not good enough, after all this time and all this work? It was a feeling I dreaded, and it haunted me as I navigated the biggest challenge I had undertaken to date.

Eve ntually I sat up in bed, swung round and put my feet on the familiar brown carpet of my parents spare room. Everything I had ever owned was up for sale and suddenly I wondered if it was all worth it. Would I ever make a difference?

Eighteen months of planning, and everything that could have gone wrong did. I constantly questioned if it was a sign that I should stop. The past eight years of challenges had made me fearless. Fast paced juggernauts flying past me and near misses were never far from my memories. Would this be the challenge that would finally see me fail? Would I lose a limb, or injure myself so badly that I could never do another challenge? The future felt so uncertain.

I reached across to the clothes hanging over the chair, pulling on a pair of sports leggings and a training top. I walked down the stairs, the summer sun only just peeking through the curtains. The light caught in the gaps and my breath caught with it.

I walked into the small, compact, perfectly organised kitchen; my mothers love evident in every part of it. I made my usual breakfast: quinoa, hot raspberries, live yoghurt and cacao nibs. I sat down and sighed as I followed the ritual of mindful eating. I knew diet could be the make or break of this challenge Id learnt this lesson the hard way two years ago, while travelling across America.

Sinking into the comfort of an armchair that was older than me, I felt a sense of security and homeliness. The sun was rising, and through the window, it caught the picture frame of a younger me. A smell of flowers wafted in from my mothers abundant garden as I opened my laptop for an early morning video call with the sponsor of my next challenge.

This simple and easy life seemed at odds with the corporations I often work with. As the faces arrived on the screen in front of me, their expressions told me so much and yet so little. I felt the unease rise in me, but I smiled and greeted everyone with my usual external optimism.

Hi, how are you?
Everyone on the screen smiled back and joined the chorus of greetings.

Then, the main sponsor cut to the chase. So, how are things going?

Oh yes, its all going well, I said, with a smile. Weve obviously moved from the challenge happening in Europe as I mentioned in my last email. But I think the UK will give some great coverage and, while it wasnt the plan, I think writing KINDNESS across England will give some incredible opportunities

The sponsor responded without even blinking. I dont think it will be possible for us to sponsor you now.

No one else reacted. I could feel their eyes on my face, waiting for my reaction, watching to see what I would do or say next. I took a moment to steady my breath.
Ah, ok.
More conversation followed, but I had stopped listening, their words becoming white noise as I started to think of what to do next. A wave of electricity coursed through my body and the hairs on the backs of my arms stood on end.

Outwardly, I smiled and took the crushing news as gracefully as I could. There were too many people on the call for me to question the decision without appearing desperate. With just a matter of weeks to go and continued knockbacks, my confidence and self-worth had been getting lower and lower. Now, I was watching it pack its bags and walk out of the door without so much as a backward glance.

Hearing that they were unable to provide the financial support that they had promised had a physical effect on my gut. I felt the visceral kick that started the familiar sinking spiral. My stomach was turning and churning. All of the problems I thought I had solved came rushing back into my mind, casting a heavy fog over the path Id set out for myself.

I shut my laptop and glanced up at the picture of my younger self. How did I get here? Why was this happening to me, just two weeks to go until my next challenge? Why now, when I needed support more than ever?

For the first time in months, I let the emotion pour out of me, loudly and unapologetically and wholeheartedly. Tears that Id stubbornly held back finally made their presence known, spilling down my face . Everything felt in jeopardy. Everything, including my own sanity, was on the line.

Later that day, my dreams of gaining a support vehicle and a driver also became a distant memory. I now didnt know how I would actually achieve the 5,000 miles I needed to seal the world record, but giving up was not an option. This perseverance didnt come naturally to me. When I was younger, it had been so easy for me to walk away when tough challenges presented themselves but, when I met Paul, he changed all that.

Falling in l ove with Paul has been a highlight of my life. Paul was six foot something with a full head of dark hair that, with time, became peppered with grey. He had no defining features, no big nose or small lips, although sometimes I poked fun at his ears. He should have been instantly attractive, but I didnt see it straight away. Wed been friends a long time before something changed. In the end, Paul and I fell in love with the people that we both were on the inside, which is comforting and heart-breaking in equal measure.

Whenever Paul was chatting to someone and I sidled up into the crook of his arm to join in, it was like coming home. I had always belonged in the warmth of that place. He told me I lit up a room, but I now know that I was shining for him. What I know for sure, even a decade since his unexpected death, is that we were intrinsically linked, as though he took over a part of my very being. I knew what he was going to say and what he was thinking. For the first time in my 32 years of existence, I was myself.

He was as some might describe, 'a bit of a one', and was not always known for making the best decisions in his personal life. However, he was funny and, despite his claims and personal history, surprisingly loyal. His life had routine and structure, making him predictable in some ways, but he was very spontaneous when it came to other parts of who he was.

Paul, unlike me, was a pretty practical person. He was a fixer of all things and it was another reason why I loved him so much. When the car broke down it was fixed with the help of a coat hanger. When I had troubles, he managed to fix those too. He always found a solution to everything. On all the adventures Id been on since his death, I wish he had been with me But if he were there, I would never have become the person I am today.