Mary Pipher - Women Rowing North: Navigating Lifes Currents and Flourishing As We Age

More Praise for Women Rowing North

[Piphers] quest for joy and happiness is sincere, as is her commitment to helping other women achieve theirs All readers will admire her unadorned but wise summation that answered prayers are a surcease of worry. The Washington Post

Thoughtful, wise, and profoundly transformative. This is truly a one of a kind book. Julia Alvarez, author of How the Garc a Girls Lost Their Accents and Once Upon a Quincea era

[A] wisdom-filled guide Piphers mindful tips act as a map to joy and remind us that we can flourish through all of our years. Womans World

An illuminating, much-needed template for moving through advancing years with gratitude and grace. Barbara Graham, New York Times bestselling author and editor of Eye of My Heart

Sets the direction, shows the dangers, and brings the reader safely through to joy. I feel gratitude, not only for life, but for this wonderful book. Jane Isay, author of Unconditional Love

A work chock-full of wisdom and consoling messages. Publishers Weekly (starred review)

Simultaneously honest and calming. A profound and comforting guide to living deftly and deeply well into old age. Meg Cox, author of The Book of New Family Traditions

[Pipher] writes with authority and authenticity, shaping her accumulated wisdom with her artful writers voice The book is a gift that provides comfort, caring, and a positive way forward. More Content Now

This positive, affirming book will inspire and guide women facing these challenges. Booklist

Written with eloquence and commitment. The women [Pipher] describes have earned the right to be both present and accounted for. Robert Fulford, National Post

I love this book. Dont stop with a once-through reading. I myself keep it at hand to dip into for a quick shot of Mary Piphers matter-of-fact wisdom, humor, and instinct for the essential. It never fails. Joanna Macy, author of Coming Back to Life

To all the women who have traveled with me along the river

BY THE SAME AUTHOR

The Green Boat: Reviving Ourselves in Our Capsized Culture

Seeking Peace: Chronicles of the Worst Buddhist in the World

Writing to Change the World

Letters to a Young Therapist

The Middle of Everywhere: Helping Refugees Enter the American Community

Another Country: Navigating the Emotional Terrain of Our Elders

The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding our Families

Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls

Hunger Pains: The Modern Womans Tragic Quest for Thinness

Contents

Dear readers,

Since the publication of Women Rowing North in January of 2019, I have been deeply touched by the many letters I received. Women have written to tell me of their struggles with aging, including loss of vision, troubles with adult children, or fears of falling and breaking bones. Many women felt my book helped them build better days and develop more resilient personalities. Some said that the book had given them hope when they had been expecting to live in despair the rest of their lives. One woman wrote that, after two broken hips and her husbands death, she had given up, but that Women Rowing North showed her a path forward.

Other women wrote to say they were already strong copers and skillful at happiness. They were proud someone was telling their story. Some sent pictures of their kayaks, their gardens, or themselves with their friends on campouts. After reading about my hand pain and many hand surgeries, some women offered me advice. One woman gave me a Celtic hand meditation that I found healing. The readers trust and kindness made me cry.

A few raised topics for further exploration. I heard from elder orphans who were aging and fearful there would be no one to help them as they aged. Widowed and divorced women wanted to know about dating in their sixties and seventies. Others asked for more examples of women caring for family members with chronic, debilitating illnesses.

Even men have written to say that they liked the book and felt it applied to them. (Several joked that I should write a new volume called Men Going South .) Many book clubs selected Women Rowing North , and several medical centers and universities built curriculums around its ideas. I have enjoyed thinking of women drinking wine or tea and discussing the books themes, such as creating transcendent narratives or the power of yes and the power of no. I am pleased that teaching centers found the ideas in my book worthy of promulgating. These centers were also looking for better cultural education about aging and identity. People cannot change unless they have a vision of the change that is possible. I tried to offer that vision.

All these responses indicate that the books timing was spot on. It turns out that my generation of women wants a fresh paradigm for aging. Our lives are not like our mothers lives and we are weary of ageist, sexist portrayals of older women. The letters also validated my own informed optimism about the nature of humans. Almost all of us want to grow to our full potential and to be the happiest, most useful and loving people we can possibly be. We are eager to learn how to live deeper, more authentic lives.

As a baby boomer myself, I was eager to frame issues around older women in more positive and growth-enhancing ways. In Women Rowing North , I share all I know about being happy and leading a meaningful life rich in relationships.

Of course, I keep discovering new stories. For example, one of my friends who moved into a care facility was able to convince the facilitys owner to let her supervise the growing of fresh vegetables for the residents. When I visited Kay in March, the halls around her room were filled with organic plants and grow lights. Kay could water these plants from her wheelchair. By July, when we toured the outdoor garden, she was providing kale, lettuce, carrots, and green beans to the kitchen. Fresh corn was on the way. When Kay told me how much the residents liked homegrown tomatoes, she beamed with pride and pleasure.

Since I wrote Women Rowing North , I have officiated at a funeral of a friends husband and helped her grieve the loss of her partner of fifty years and adjust to a new life. Ive walked with her on icy trails around Holmes Lake at sunset and just lately Ive danced with her at outdoor summer events where my husbands band provided the music. I have seen how a community of kind people gather around the grieving and help them live on with hope and a sense of belonging.

This is one of the great things about life. Every day beautiful new stories fall around us like light.

I hope all of you new readers find Women Rowing North useful. I continue to be grateful for the gift of life and am honored to share my time and place with so many wonderful people. I truly wish all of you the best on your journeys north.

Women Rowing North

Navigating Lifes Currents and Flourishing as We Age

I have everything I need to be happy right between my ears. Jane Jarvis

Women Rowing North is about the specific issues women face as we transition from middle age to old age. The core concern of this life stage, with all of its perils and pleasures, is how to cultivate resilient responses to the challenges we face. Resilience is built by attention and intention. We can take responsibility for our attitudes and focus on our strengths and our joys. We can go deep and face truth squarely. We can learn the skills that allow us to adapt to anything. Yes, anything.