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Mary Pipher - Reviving Ophelia 25th Anniversary Edition: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls

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Mary Pipher Reviving Ophelia 25th Anniversary Edition: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls
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The 25th anniversary edition of the iconic book, revised and updated for 21st-century adolescent girls and their families.
In 1994, Reviving Ophelia was published, and it shone a much-needed spotlight on the problems faced by adolescent girls. The book became iconic and helped to reframe the national conversation about what author Mary Pipher called a girl-poisoning culture surrounding adolescents. Fast forward to today, and adolescent girls and the parents, teachers, and counselors who care about them find themselves confronting many of the same challenges Pipher wrote about originally as well as new ones specific to today.
Girls still struggle with misogyny, sexism, and issues of identity and self-esteem. But theyre also more isolated than ever before: They dont talk face-to-face to the people around them, including their peers, as they used to: Theyre texting or on social media for hours at a time. And while girls today are less likely to be in trouble for their drinking or sexual behavior, they have a greater chance of becoming depressed, anxious, or suicidal.
In this revised and updated Reviving Ophelia, Pipher and her daughter, Sara Pipher Gilliam (who was a teenager at the time of the books original publication), have incorporated these new issues for a 21st-century readership. In addition to examining the impact that social media has on adolescent girls lives today, Pipher and Gilliam explore the rising and empowering importance of student activism in girls lives, the wider acceptance of diverse communities among young people, and the growing disparities between urban and rural, rich and poor, and how they can affect young girls sense of self-worth. With a new foreword and afterword and chapters that explore these topics, this new edition of Reviving Ophelia builds on the relevance of the original as it provides key insights into the challenges and opportunities facing adolescent girls today.
The approach Pipher and Gilliam take in the new edition is just what it was in the original: a timely, readable combination of insightful research and real-world examples that illuminate the challenges young women face and the ways to address them. This updated Reviving Ophelia looks at 21st century adolescent girls through fresh eyes, with insights and ideas that will help new generations of readers.

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PRAISE FOR Reviving Ophelia A compelling account Roanoke Times - photo 1

PRAISE FOR

Reviving Ophelia

[A] compelling account.

Roanoke Times & World-News

Pipher is an eloquent advocate.... With sympathy and focus she cites case histories to illustrate the struggles required of adolescent girls to maintain a sense of themselves.... Pipher offers concrete suggestions for ways by which girls can build and maintain a strong sense of self.

Publishers Weekly

Pipher integrates literature, memoirs, and memories of her own adolescence and that of her daughter; she also has a deft way of summing up psychological phenomena in laypersons terms.... Serious and thoughtful material presented with the fluidity of good fiction.

Kirkus Reviews

A must-read for all of us who care about the young women in our lives.... Reviving Ophelia arms us with information we can use in helping our daughters grow to adulthood with their strength intact.

Lincoln Journal Star

This book is the first to explore carefully the many aspects of adolescence. It does so without blaming, vilifying, or shouting Victim here. Instead Dr. Pipher uses clear, jargonless language and fascinating stories to challenge readers to look at what our culture does to teenage girls. Parents, teachers, and therapists alike will profit from Dr. Piphers knowledge.

D R . M ARY K ENNING , Juvenile Justice System, Minneapolis

Adolescent girls have always fallen through the cracks, but now they are tumbling into a chasm. Dr. Pipher goes deep inside their world and comes back with a clearheaded and compassionate report. We owe it to ourselves and our daughters to read this book.

C AROL S PINDEL

BY

Mary Pipher

Women Rowing North

The Green Boat

Seeking Peace

Writing to Change the World

Letters to a Young Therapist

The Middle of Everywhere

Another Country

The Shelter of Each Other

Reviving Ophelia

Hunger Pains

R IVERHEAD B OOKS An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC - photo 2

R IVERHEAD B OOKS An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC - photo 3

R IVERHEAD B OOKS

An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC

penguinrandomhouse.com

Copyright 1994 by Mary Pipher PhD Copyright 2019 by Mary Pipher PhD and - photo 4

Copyright 1994 by Mary Pipher, Ph.D.

Copyright 2019 by Mary Pipher, Ph.D., and Sara Pipher Gilliam

Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Pipher, Mary Bray, author. | Gilliam, Sara Pipher, author.

Title: Reviving Ophelia : saving the selves of adolescent girls / Mary Pipher, Ph.D., and Sara Pipher Gilliam.

Other titles: Saving the selves of adolescent girls

Description: Riverhead 25th anniversary edition. | New York City : Riverhead Books, 2019. | An updated edition of the 1994 Putnam publication.

Identifiers: LCCN 2019003400 (print) | LCCN 2019006433 (ebook) | ISBN 9780525537052 (ebook) | ISBN 9780525537045 (pbk.)

Subjects: LCSH: Teenage girls--Psychology. | Teenage girls--Family relationships. | Self-esteem in adolescence. | Girls--United States--Social conditions--21st century. | Girls--United States--Social life and customs--21st century.

Classification: LCC HQ798 (ebook) | LCC HQ798 .P57 2019 (print) | DDC 305.235/2--dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019003400

G. P. Putnams Sons hardcover edition: April 1994

First Ballantine Books trade paperback edition: March 1995

First Riverhead trade paperback edition: July 2005

Riverhead 25th Anniversary edition: June 2019

Riverhead 25th Anniversary edition ISBN: 978-0-525-53704-5

All clients are composite characters drawn from the authors life experiences and clinical work. Names and details have been changed to protect confidentiality.

Version_1

Acknowledgments

The following people helped us with the 2019 edition of the book: Francis Baty, Pam Barger, Ina Bhoopalam, LaRae Bonebright, Ashlee Brimage, Dawn Brown, Blake Carrichner, Eric Crump, Danika and Sequoia Davis, Anaka Evans, Niki Figard, Grace Fitzgibbon, Patty Forsberg, Sandy Gallentine, Nijole Gedutis, Sarah Gervais, Julia Haack, Rachel Halliday, Beth Hardy, Sophie Holz, Ellen James, Gillian Burrow Jenkins, Ann and Grace Kaseman, Neva Kushner, Frank McPherson, Mary Kon, Lynda Madison, Laurel Maslowski, Megan May, Helen Meyer, Anna Musgrave, Abbie Radenslaben, Jesse Reed, Meghan Renz, Abbie Rosauer, Shari Stenberg, Paige Trevarrow, Emma Went, and Ken and Helen Winston.

Our granddaughter/niece Kate Pipher read and edited this book multiple times and we are grateful for her knowledge and thoughtfulness.

We thank our agent, Susan Lee Cohen; Reviving Ophelias original editor, Jane Isay; and our editor at Penguin USA, Jake Morrissey.

To the rebels and the shy girls, the activists and the poets, the big sisters and the little sisters, the daughters and dreamers. We believe in you.

Contents
Introduction

MARY

REVIVINGOPHELIA WAS MY attempt to understand my experiences as a mother of a teenage daughter and a therapist for adolescent girls. I wrote it in 1994 to sound an alarm about the poisonous culture that adolescent girls were experiencing. At the time, my goals seemed grandiose: I wanted to educate therapists, teachers, and parents; to help girls heal; and to change the culture. Yet, in some ways, I feel as if the book accomplished its aims. It was widely read and loved by many teenagers and their parents. Mothers told me that it helped them understand their daughters. Psychologists gradually moved away from attributing teenagers problems to their dysfunctional families and turned instead to helping adolescents and their parents cope with a difficult cultural environment. Educators developed ways to encourage and sustain girls interest in math and science. All over the country organizations such as the Ophelia Project, Girl Scouts, and the YWCA worked to empower young women.

I am deeply grateful to my readers, the communities that hosted me for speaking events, and the many people who contacted me to share their reactions to the book. My greatest reward has been to hear of all the positive changes that Reviving Ophelia inspired.

Twenty-five years later, I am honored to work with my daughter, Sara, to update that edition. In this book we explore what has and hasnt changed for girls, and we will examine the effects of American culture on the lives of girls today. We hope this new edition will be of use to girls and to the adults who want to help them grow into bold, kind, competent women.

In the 1990s, my office was swamped with girls with serious, even life-threatening, problems, such as anorexia or the desire to harm themselves. Others had problems that ranged from refusing to go to school, to intentionally underachieving, to constantly provoking fights with their parents. These kinds of issues were less dangerous than suicide threats but more puzzling. Many of my clients were victims of sexual violence. As I talked with these girls, I became aware of how little I really understood about the world of adolescent girls in the 1990s. My adolescent experiences from the early 1960s werent helpful. Girls in the 1990s were living in a whole new world, a world of increasingly violent and sexualized television, MTV videos, and blatantly sexualized advertising.

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