Alison Davies - Be Your Own Fairy Tale: Working with Storytelling for Positive Life Change

Be Your Own
Fairy Tale

Contents

Introduction

The Victorians called fairy tales wonder tales and its easy to see why. These profound fables are filled with magic, and symbolism that resonates within the soul. More than simple stories of good versus evil, they use archetypes that are not only embedded in our subconscious but also evident in the universal subconscious, conjuring up feelings that we can all identify with on some level. They help us tap into our primal nature and rediscover the latent power within. These tales can deliver salient lessons and trigger the subconscious mind into action.

The deeper symbolism of fairy tales may not be obvious at first glance. But once you begin to compare them, youll notice characters and scenarios that are continually repeated. Youll find that certain storylines feel more important to you, and that you can easily identify with the struggles of particular characters. Because of the use of archetypes, youll find it easy to picture these stories in your mind. Everyone knows what a wicked witch looks like, and in a heartbeat can bring her to life in their mind. Like a child learning to read, youll visually connect with each tale because its easy to imagine a castle or a dark wood. These stories are part of our childhood and also part of our social history. Like any form of storytelling they bind us together and help us build a common landscape. Whether or not you agree with the moral aspect of each tale, youll still be able to work with the themes and relate them to your own life because fairy tales deal with the things that will always be important to us in life: hopes and dreams, love and betrayal, courage and weakness.

Fairy tales dont shy away from problems and the dark side of life. The stepmother manipulating her husband to abandon his children in the woods; the queen obsessed with her own beauty to the point of murderous insanity ... these stories arent always pleasant, just as real life is a mixture of light and dark, good and evil.

You can use fairy tales to work with your psyche and understand what really makes you tick. They can help you break bad habits, overcome obstacles and emerge from the chrysalis to make your mark in the world. It can be as easy as aligning yourself to a character in a tale and then putting a positive spin on it. Sometimes the simple act of making it real, by living out the story in your mind, can change the way you think and behave. And because these tales are littered with potent symbols, its easy to tap into their power and use them in exercises that will encourage new ways of thinking.

FINDING ENCHANTMENT AGAIN

Fairy tales first engage us when were very young, triggering our imagination at a time when were just beginning to find our way in the world. Theyre never just about entertainment. When we first hear fairy tales, were figuring out who we are, and making sense of our surroundings, and these stories help. We can play out very real scenarios in a make-believe world. We can face our fears, knowing that if it all gets too much, we can put down the book and try again another time.

These tales provide a key to our subconscious mind through their use of archetypes, and slowly we begin to form our own opinions, hopes and dreams. As we grow its easy to leave them behind, to become disengaged from the fairy-tale world, as we long to get stuck into the reality of our existence. Like Jack taking the cow to market, we want to prove ourselves in the real world. And like Jack, were prone to making mistakes that well hopefully learn from. We get caught up in the world of ten thousand things, of daily pressures and stress and of juggling many different roles. But, ultimately, were still that story-loving child at heart. Our imagination exists and needs to be fed. Our necessity to see magic in the mundane, and to create and manifest the things we want, is always present. When we reintroduce fairy tales into our life we instantly reconnect. Its like going home.

THE ENCHANTMENT

But what is it that gives fairy tales such staying power? For me, personally, its the vivid imagery and symbolism, and the potent messages entwined in each tale. As a child I devoured these stories, almost believing that if I read them over and over, I might actually be able to step into them and become the characters. I remember reading Rumpelstiltskin and being entranced by the colourful pictures. I could imagine this strange little man with magical powers and a truly wicked streak. I could see him dancing from one foot to the other in glee at the thought of taking the queens baby. The story came alive for me and I felt the queens fear and frustration. I desperately wanted to help her to guess his name, so that she could break free from the deal theyd made. Even now, as an adult, I find that this tale brings up strong feelings. I feel the injustice of the situation that the maiden was put in. How on earth can anyone spin straw into gold? It seems to me she has little choice but to accept the help of Rumpelstiltskin, even if she knows that inevitably shell have to pay the price. I feel a sense of relief when she discovers his real name and her future is no longer in jeopardy. To me this story is far from simple. It has so many meanings and messages and the more you study it, the more you learn about yourself and the world. This tale makes me realize how much I value justice and fairness in all things. It also helps me to see how straw can be turned into gold in other words, no matter how bleak a situation might at first appear, there is always a chink of light that guides the way forward.

A MAGICAL BLUEPRINT

I work with fairy tales in my storytelling workshops and Ive seen the powerful effect they can have. There are little nuggets of understanding in each narrative. For example, one woman was struggling with some issues in her life. She felt impatient. Things werent moving as fast as she would have liked and in her frustration shed cut a few corners, which had only made things worse and set her back further. We were discussing The Three Little Pigs, when she suddenly had a light-bulb moment. Ah, she said, now I understand. The first little pig thinks, I cant be bothered to do things properly, Im in a rush, I want my house now. So he builds his house out of straw and the big bad wolf comes along, huffs and puffs and blows it down. The second little pig thinks, Well, I know I should do more, but I still dont want to spend all this time building my home. So he makes his house out of twigs. The wolf comes along, huffs and puffs and blows it down. The third little pig sees what has happened to his friends. He understands that to get where he wants to be and have a secure home, he must put in the time and effort. There are no shortcuts. He takes all day and builds his house from bricks, and no matter how hard the wolf tries, he cant blow the house down.

In that moment the woman compared this simple fairy tale to her own situation and finally understood why some things couldnt be rushed at least not if she wanted lasting success. She used the tale as a blueprint for her life and it helped her to see a way forward.

SURVIVAL KIT

Interestingly, some scholars believe that historically fairy tales were used as tools to pass on survival tips to the next generation. This is because they deal with a range of themes and certainly dont shy away from controversial topics, such as violation, abuse and betrayal. Consider