Olivia M. Cloud - The Greatest Gift I Could Offer: Quotations from Barack Obama on Parenting and Family

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Table of Contents

I resolved many years ago that it was my obligation to break the cyclethat if I could be anything in life, I would be a good father to my girls; that if I could give them anything, I would give them that rockthat foundationon which to build their lives. And that would be the greatest gift I could offer.

INTRODUCTION

IN LESS THAN two years, Barack Obama has become a national symbol of hope. His historic victory on November 4, 2008, is for many the fulfillment of a dream long held. An emerging icon of change, President Obama is the embodiment of the American Dream. Repeatedly, he has said of himself, In no other country on earth is my story even possible. It is precisely because Obamas life story is such an unlikely one that he has emerged as a transformative figure.

Without a doubt, Obama is a phenomenal man who represents a changing landscape in America. However, to most of us, he is also a regular guy. Raised primarily by a single mother and her parents, our 44th president is a man of simple mid-America roots. He is the son who grew up without a father, but who made his mother proud. He is the husband who forgets to pick up his socks off the bedroom floor, but is madly in love with his wife. He is the father who attends parent-teacher conferences and still finds time to read Harry Potter to his daughters.

People love Barack Obama because he has the vision and humility to be a leader of the free world. He also demonstrates empathy for those he has been elected to serve. He knows what it means to repay student loans. He understands the struggles of living within a household budget. He even knows what it feels like to have his credit card declined. His experiences, about which he has been forthright, are those with which the majority of Americans can relate.

Barack Obama demonstrates a commitment to family that is not promoted to impress a voting public; but rather, his commitment is that of a true family man. When he left the campaign trail to visit his grandmother just weeks before the election, many pundits questioned whether his absence would hurt the campaign. Yet, he chose a few final moments with his dying grandmother over the possibility of a few lost votes.

There are other reminders of his devotion to family: the touching picture of his mother-in-law, Marian Robinson, holding his hand as they watched the election returns; the announcement that she would be coming to live with them in the White House to help Michelle look after the girls; and the biggest news of allMalia and Sashas new puppy!

In October 2008, I had an opportunity to briefly meet the Obamas after the second presidential debate hosted by Nashvilles Belmont University. As the one of a chosen few town hall debate delegates, I had an opportunity to see beyond the television cameras eye. As the debate ensued, I took a moment to pan our surroundings. I looked beyond one section of delegates and suppressed the urge to gasp when I saw Michelle Obama. I dont know why I was surprised to see her. I suppose it was because no one told us she would be there.

Then, only for a second, I caught a glimpse of her mouthing a quick message to her husband. I couldnt make out the words, but her lip movements and eye contact were quite deliberate and focused toward him. Her actions were quick and discreet. The brief incident was fascinating primarily because Michelles actions were typical of what any supportive spouse would do for a partner about to venture onto the stage.

At that moment, it occurred to me that there were eighty delegates and about 1,000 spectators watching the debate in that room, plus an estimated sixty-three million more nationwide. But with all those people watching, including senators, representatives, celebrities, and a former vice president, Barack Obamas eyes locked in to one person at that critical momenthis wife.

Ill never know the content of that quickly mouthed message, but heres something I did come to understand during my debate experience: the Obamas are a real family; theyre a real married couple. She wants to help him do his best and, in turn, her opinion matters to him.

Following the debate, we were allowed to take pictures. After having successfully maneuvered pictures with the Obamas separately, I wanted morea shot with the two of them. I asked Michelle if she thought she could use her wifely influence to get him to stop for a pose. She surveyed the crowd, found her husband across the room, and immediately but graciously assessed that she could not accommodate my request. I was disappointed, but her response reflected a wife who knows her husband. She knew he was in his zone, talking with voters about their concerns, answering questions, and giving photo ops.

My brief encounter with the Obamas led me on the journey of this book. During the debate, I was intrigued by his response to what Tom Brokaw called a Zen-like question: What dont you know and how will you learn it? Barack quickly pointed to Michelle as the person who could probably best tell what he did not know.

Many times, Ive reflected on that encounter, as well as Obamas numerous comments regarding familiesfrom expressing his concern over the spiraling economys impact on the family to his frustration over watching his mother battle with the insurance company regarding her illnessand I am encouraged. I know beyond a shadow of doubt that the American family has a true ally in the White House.

What is inspiring about President Obama is that he has always made it a priority to publicly voice his commitment to his wife and daughters, to connect his own family experiences to Americas families, and to share his philosophies about what family truly means. This commitment to family is poignantly reflected in his profound speeches, in his media interviews, and in his books, Dreams from My Father and The Audacity of Hope. In sharing his words, I hope they will be as enriching and insightful to you as they are to me.

Olivia M. Cloud

Of all the rocks upon which we build our lives, we are reminded today that family is the most important.

TO HOLD THINGS TOGETHER

MICHELLE GREW UP with a dad who was an exemplary model of devotion and responsibility, while most of what Barack knows of his father was gleaned from letters and stories from his mother and grandparents.

Despite their diverse upbringings, the first couple formed a loving bond based on a mutual desire to build a strong family. Michelle wants a good husband and father in her own family because she knows what that feels like and how important it is. Barack wants the same, precisely because he didnt have his father in his life and deeply desires to give to his daughters what he missed.

Its apparent that Michelle and Barack are a team, even if at times the partnership seems a little more one-sided. But most marriages are like that. Even partners in the best, most solid unions at some point have to do the hard work of finding balance and rhythm in their relationship for the sake of the entire family.

I know what it means when you dont have a strong male figure in the house, which is why the hardest thing about me being in politics sometimes is not being home as much as Id like, and Im just blessed that Ive got such a wonderful wife at home to hold things together.

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