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Aspen Baker - Pro-Voice: How to Keep Listening When the World Wants a Fight

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Dialogue, Not Dogma
When Aspen Baker had an abortion at the age of twenty-four, she felt caught between the warring pro-life and pro-choice factions, with no safe space to share her feelings.
In this hopeful and moving book, Baker describes how she and Exhale, the organization she cofounded, developed their pro-voice philosophy and the creative approaches they employed to help women and men have respectful, compassionate exchanges about even this most controversial of topics. She shows how pro-voice can be adopted by anyone interested in replacing ideological gridlock with empathetic conversation. Peace, in this perspective, isnt a world without conflict but one where conflict can be engaged infiercely and directlywithout dehumanizing ourselves or our opponents.

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More Praise for Pro-Voice

In a world where everyone forces you to chose a side around abortion, Pro-Voice challenges all of us to put empathy first and ideology second. Aspen Baker radically reframes our current culture war over abortion by putting stories first. By centering the voices of women, Baker clearly explains that actual conversationnot preaching or stonewallingis the only way to move forward.

Latoya Peterson, feminist, activist, and owner and Editor, Racialicious.com

Weve made great progress on tough social issues by sharing our stories authentically. Pro-Voice dives into that topic and makes it actionable. If youre an organizer, its a must-read in 2015!

Raven Brooks, Editor, Netroots Nation

Thank you, Aspen, for asking the global community to create an environment of compassionate pro-voice dialogue around this ubiquitous, incendiary issue. May this book birth the healing we all need.

Deborah Santana, author, philanthropist, and founder of Do a Little

The pro-voice movement Aspen Baker founded in Exhale is based on the idea that we are all storytellers, with the right to our own stories; specifically that every woman has the right to her own feelings about the experience of abortion, whatever they might be. As a journalist who writes about reproductive rights, I truly believe this approach is the only way to bridge a divide in this country that is putting womens lives in peril.

Liz Welch, award-winning journalist and coauthor of The Kids Are All Right and I Will Always Write Back

In Pro-Voice, Aspen Baker shows us how to make Americas abortion wars a relic of the past. Sharing and listening can heal old wounds and generate a new understanding and respect for this deeply personal issue.

US Congresswoman Gwen Moore

The best social and policy change begins with having discussion in the real world with real people. In this book, Aspen shows us a way to listen to women in a deeper way, creating a space for us to see the complexity of experiences with abortion. This is the kind of space that will help us reach across the divisions that often separate us and see the humanity in each other. Bravo, Aspen and pro-voice!

Eveline Shen, MPH, Executive Director, Forward Together

We have less and less authentic space for dialogue in our country, yet Aspen Baker has taken the power of listening into the most contentious of territories, the abortion debate. She has shown that the stories that emerge when someone feels respected and safe enough to share them have the power to heal. We can choose to listen, and if we do, perhaps we can create a healthier society.

Joe Lambert, founder and Executive Director, Center for Digital Storytelling

The abortion debateor rather, standoffis one of the most polarizing in our polarized country. Pro-Voice creates humane connections across the passion-filled gulf that divides abortion conversations; then, as Jonathan Powell has also written recently, There is no conflict in the world that cannot be solved. If that is not a reason for hope, what is?

Michael Nagler, author of The Search for a Nonviolent Future and The Nonviolence Handbook and President, Metta Center for Nonviolence

In Pro-Voice, Aspen Baker raises a bold mandate that we hear peoples abortion stories and imagines a world in which abortion is understood not through conflict but through empathy, regardless of ones politics. Baker shows, despite the loud rhetoric, that personal experiences with abortion are rarely spoken, and even more rarely are they compassionately heard. Proudly defying political categorization, Pro-Voice challenges everyone to step away from the fight in favor of deeper understanding. This is a most courageous and necessary book.

Marjorie Jolles, PhD, Associate Professor, Womens and Gender Studies, Roosevelt University

Aspen Bakers sharply insightful new book illuminates the refreshingand groundbreakingattitude she takes toward abortion, a stance that embraces the emotional complexity of womens abortion experiences and reveals the discussions many gray areas that are so often obscured by political gamesmanship.

Martha Shane, filmmaker, After Tiller

In this wise and compassionate book, Aspen Baker makes clear how strange it is that the people who battle over abortion policy rarely hear the stories of women who have actually had abortions. With sensitivity and insight, she shows that peoples personal stories can transform the debate. Pro-Voice is smart, provocative, and, finally, heartening.

Francesca Polletta, Professor of Sociology, University of California, Irvine, and author of It Was Like a Fever

PRO-VOICE

PRO-VOICE

HOW TO KEEP LISTENING WHEN THE WORLD WANTS A FIGHT

ASPEN BAKER

Pro-Voice Copyright 2015 by Aspen Baker All rights reserved No part of this - photo 1

Pro-Voice

Copyright 2015 by Aspen Baker

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed Attention: Permissions Coordinator, at the address below.

Pro-Voice How to Keep Listening When the World Wants a Fight - image 2Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.
1333 Broadway, Suite 1000
Oakland, CA 94612-1921
Tel: (510) 817-2277, Fax: (510) 817-2278
www.bkconnection.com

Ordering information for print editions

Quantity sales. Special discounts are available on quantity purchases by corporations, associations, and others. For details, contact the Special Sales Department at the Berrett-Koehler address above.

Individual sales. Berrett-Koehler publications are available through most bookstores. They can also be ordered directly from Berrett-Koehler: Tel: (800) 929-2929; Fax: (802) 864-7626; www.bkconnection.com

Orders for college textbook/course adoption use. Please contact Berrett-Koehler: Tel: (800) 929-2929; Fax: (802) 864-7626.

Orders by U.S. trade bookstores and wholesalers. Please contact Ingram Publisher Services, Tel: (800) 509-4887; Fax: (800) 838-1149; E-mail: for details about electronic ordering.

Berrett-Koehler and the BK logo are registered trademarks of Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.

First Edition

Paperback print edition ISBN 978-1-62656-110-6

PDF e-book ISBN 978-1-62656-111-3

IDPF e-book ISBN 978-1-62656-112-0

2015-1

Interior design: VJB/Scribe. Proofreader: Henrietta Bensussen. Editor: Elissa Rabellino. Index: Stimson Indexing. Cover/jacket design: Wes Youssi/M.80 Design. Cover photo: Reny Preussker. Production service: Linda Jupiter Productions.

Dedicated with love to my husband, Chris, and our son, Wolfgang

Contents
Preface

I was 24 years old, pregnant, scared, and unsure about what to do. I went out on a limb and told someone whom I didnt know very well about my situation, only to discover a universal truth: we all have our own hidden stories.

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