Maria Lianos-Carbone - Oh Baby! A Moms Self-Care Survival Guide for the First Year: Because Moms Need a Little TLC, Too!

Praise for Oh Baby !

Maria has a way of telling it like it is from a very personal perspective. While she shares her own motherhood experiences, most will be completely relatable to new and nervous moms looking for some reassurance that everything is okay. Readers will find it easy to flip to their current concern as the chapters are laid out in a succinct, easy-to-read format. A sort of up-to-date What to Expect , readers will also learn what to accept .

Kathy Buckworth, author of I Am So the Boss of You

Advice you want in a tone youll love. Lianos-Carbone mixes the facts and support every new parent needs with the smile-at-the-whole-crazy-ride we want in that moment. No patronizing help here; she tells us exactly what to expect andeven betterreminds us that new parenting is worth the struggle.

Deborah Gilboa, MD, author of Get the Behavior You Want... Without Being the Parent You Hate!

When I gave birth to my first child in 1980, I wondered what was wrong with me when reality didnt match my idealized vision of blissful motherhood. Oh Baby! would have saved me a lot of anxiety. Maria writes like a big sister, or a best girlfriend who had a baby before you, sharing secrets of the motherhood trade in an intelligent, down-to-earth manner. Doctors should hand this book to all their expectant moms.

Mary Potter Kenyon, mother of eight, author or coauthor of six books, including Mary & Me: A Lasting Link through Ink and the award-winning Refined by Fire: A Journey of Grief and Grace

Copyright 2018 by Maria Lianos-Carbone

Illustrations copyright 2018 by Garyl Arts

All rights reserved.

Published by Familius LLC, www.familius.com

Familius books are available at special discounts for bulk purchases, whether for sales promotions or for family or corporate use. For more information, contact Familius Sales at 559-876-2170 or email orders@familius.com.

Reproduction of this book in any manner, in whole or in part, without written permission of the publisher is prohibited.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

2017958503

Print ISBN 9781945547706

Ebook ISBN 9781641700061

Printed in the United States of America

Edited by Michele Robbins

Cover design by David Miles

Book design by Brooke Jorden

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

First Edition

To my husband, Genio, who gave me the gift of time to write,

and to my kids, Anthony and Daniel, who gave me the gift of being their mother.

Introduction

W hen you become pregnant, you think you do a great job preparing for baby to arrive. You buy all of babys es sentials, baby-proof the home, and have the car seat and stroller ready. The nursery is painted, furniture is assembled, and clothes are washed and put away.

I had taken birth classes, toured the maternity ward, and read every book there was. I was so ready! But then labor and delivery completely threw off everything I prepared for. Baby was born, and then I realized I had NO idea what I was doing. I thought it would be a piece of cake to feed the baby, change his diaper, and have him fall asleep. What was I thinking?!

Nothing quite prepares you for motherhood. While you may think you have all the bases covered in time for babys arrival, you may not be mentally and emotionally prepared for the changes youll experience as a new mother. Oh baby! But what about Mom?

Motherhood changes you fundamentally as a human being and as a woman. It forces you to question everything about yourselfyour instincts, your core values, and your goals. Motherhood also challenges you in every respect: your decision-making, patience, and strength of character.

When I had my first son, I thought that some moms always looked like they had it together. Motherhood seemed to come so naturally to them. Id wonder: Are they really enjoying motherhood like they appear to be?

After some prodding, these women started to magically open up. Like an epiphany, we seemed to suddenly realize that we were all struggling to cope with the challenges of motherhood. Why were we so afraid to talk about it?

Part of it was culturalwe were supposed to know how to be a mom, just like our moms. We were supposed to be able to do it alland do it all with a smile. Part of it was womanly instinctwe were supposed to be natural at breastfeeding, changing diapers, and dealing with screaming babies.

Part of what keeps us from really sharing is fear of comparingwe dont want our friends to think that we are having a tough time while they are in complete bliss. Part of it is fear of failurewe dont want to fail at being a mom. We must figure this out!

The truth is, motherhood is the most challenging yet rewarding lifetime experience many of us will ever have. Through my journey into motherhood, I have learned many valuable lessons that have helped me to grow into the person that I am and always wanted to be.

When baby is born, the focus shifts to him. Baby books on how to parent baby are abundant. But what about how Mom is feeling? This book will focus on Mom and how she can survive that challenging yet joyful first year with baby.

A Letter to My Newborn Baby

Dear baby boy,

Im so happy that youre here in my arms. Ive been waiting for this day to come, and now its finally here. And its so much more than I ever imagined.

Holding you in my arms is something I dreamed of for so long. I could picture it in my mind, and its the best feeling in the world. Im so lucky that Im your mom.

I felt like I was missing something my entire life, and now I know whyI was waiting for you. Ive loved you since I first learned you were growing in my belly, and I will love you more and more every day as you grow. Ill be here to nurture you and give you the best life I can possibly give.

Please know that I will do my very best to guide you and protect you. Even if I make mistakes, and I know I will, please know that I will always love you with all of my heart. I hope to be the mommy that you deserve.

I hope I can guide you to be a kind, loving, and sweet little boy who cares about other people and loves ever so deeply. I hope you grow up to fulfill wonderful dreams and live a life that is full of joy and adventure.

I worry, though, because although Im here to protect you now, once youre older, you will learn about sadness too. The world is not always safe and kind. But I hope you will continue to see the good in people and the miracles of life, as I do in you.

Thank you for bringing such love and peace to my heart and my soul.

Love,

Mommy

Chapter One

Bringing Baby Home Can Be Daunting

C ongratulations! You survived your pregnancy, labor, and delivery! Feelings of joy, love, and happiness consume you and your partner as you welcome your baby into this world. Your family has grown and blossomed, and soon enough, you wont be able to imagine your life before your new bundle of joy arrived.

That long-awaited moment is finally hereits time to bring baby home and begin your life as a family! Its completely normal to feel as if the entire pregnancy and birth was surreal. Did it actually happen?! Your baby is proof that this all isnt a dream. Despite reading all the pregnancy books, asking your doctor a million questions, and perusing baby blogs, nothing can really prepare you for how youre going to feel when baby arrives.