Vanessa would like to thank the following for their help and support: Daiana Allen, Daniel Aggiano, Pete Broughton, Sue Hunt, Wensley Clarkson, Clive Hebard, Professor Kevin Browne, Reverend Peter Corcoran, Geoff Howard, Vivienne Howard, Jo Picot and Helen Todd, and staff at the North Linconshire reference Library.
F irst to Vanessa Howard. I couldnt have done this book without you. You are an amazing lady and have helped more then you know. Your patience and kindness has been amazing; my mum would be so proud of you. Thank you for helping me with this book, you have done an amazing job and I hope you are as proud of it as I am.
To my dear mother Elva Aggiano. Without your love in my life I wouldnt be who I am today. I miss you so much and I now know that you are at peace. I know you will be proud of this book. Please watch over me and the family.
To my father. I miss our chats so much; I miss surprising you with a visit as well as our walks together. Thank you for making me a better person and for finally allowing me to have a real father-daughter bond.
To Daniel Aggiano. What can I say? You were the best thing to happen to me when I was younger. I remember you being in Mums tummy and how when you were born, I would watch over you as you slept. Even though you are 10 years younger then me, you have always been my rock, you have always been at the end of the phone, always greeted me with your special hugs. Thank you, I can never truly thank you for being the amazing brother you are. I will always be proud of you. I love you millions, nice one brother!
To my sister. Thank you for all your help with the book, I love you more then you know! Heres to trying to get to know each other again and becoming sisters. For too long we have been too distant. I will always be there for you.
To Helen Todd and family. You have been a friend since school, you have been there through the good and the bad. I couldnt ask for more in a friend. Youre an amazing person with so much love to give. Believe in yourself! Thank you for being such a good friend, thank you for all the times you let me stay over for free and for putting up with me. Lets hope soon the wedding will be set so I can be a bridesmaid.
To Joann Picot and family. You have been more then a friend to me, you have been my saviour, the number of times you put a roof over my head and fed me. Your shoulders have always been there to lean on. Youre an amazing person. I am proud to call you my friend. Thank you so much for being in my life.
To Karen Kelly. You have been like a mother to me and I love you like a daughter. Thank you for always being there for me and for always making sure my hair looks fab. You are such an amazing woman and I am proud to be able to say you are in my life!
To all my friends: Anna Wallace, Gavin Potter, Mark Fillingham, Russell Ahearne, Janice Stallwood, Claire Bray, Sharon Warwick, Carl Tilly (aka Scumbag), Mike White, Steven Green, Dad Tony Wingate, Eleanor Whitby, Tracey Camelo and Toby Dodwell. You are all special to me in your own way. Theres not enough space to say what you all mean to me.
To Joey Downes. I am so glad you came into my life. You make me smile and giggle, you have opened my heart again and given me so much. Youre amazing, be strong and be proud of who you are.
To Francesca Zanellotti. So glad I met you. I know we will be friends forever.
To my work team: Granddad Bob Weir, Dad Rob Green, Uncle Malcolm Howell, Brother Steve Claxton, Manny Bisran Brother and work husband Paulo Lopez. You make me smile and laugh every day. I have never met funnier people than you lot, youre the best work team ever.
To Fionnuala Carrabyne. No matter how long we go without speaking, you are always there for me. You are such a special person to me. I love you with all my heart and I hope married life is all you ever wanted. May all your dreams come true.
To Craig Taylor. I am so glad I found you as you are such a great guy. Make sure you look after her or youre in trouble!
To John Sample, Rachel Hart, Lee Keith James the Teeside Massive. Thank you for making me feel so welcome.
To Penny Coomes and Anna Cappellini. Thank you for always making sure Daniel has someone to catch him when he falls. It means so much to me to know he has you in his life.
To Melissa Eiler. You have helped me so much with my mums website and you have been a great support. I know our folks are together watching us. Your kind words and support have been amazing and its great to know you feel the same loss as me.
To Karen Gibbons and Theresa Walsh. You have both been through so many bad things in life yet survived. You have bettered your life and shown the world what you can do. I am so proud of you and all the strength you have.
CONTENTS
THIS IS YOUR FINAL
WARNING
M y dad knew he had a few calls to make. He would have to telephone the receptionist at the plastics factory where he was working to let them know that he wouldnt make his shift that afternoon. He had already called the police, telling them he had killed his wife and that they should come quickly as he didnt want anyone else to find her that way.
By anyone else, he meant his sons, my brothers. The youngest, 9-year-old Daniel, was playing outside with friends; the eldest, Emmanuele, was on his way back home with fish and chips for four. Another call went to my sister Daiana. He told her what he had done and asked her to come home to take care of your brothers. He was sure that she would obey him.
When the police arrived, they found the door to our family home open and my dad in the hallway on the phone, motioning them to follow him into our front room. Two officers followed him and found my mothers bloodstained body. She was lying on her back, her head facing towards the kitchen, which Mum would have known was the nearest exit out of the house. One of the officers radioed back to Scunthorpe police station saying: It is as per the phone call. This was necessary, as in the minds of the other officers called to the house, they imagine it would turn out to be a hoax.
A policeman checked Mums neck to try and find a pulse but it was clear that she was dead. He then noticed the axe lying to her left-hand side, as well as her chest wounds, and guessed they were the result of a knife attack. The policeman was struck by how calm and cooperative my dad was as he stood over her.
He had been calm since Mum had stopped struggling at some point during his attack, during the twelve times he had stabbed her with our kitchen knives and hit her with an axe. Her attempt to escape him had failed. She had not listened to his final warning to return to him and, as she fell face forwards onto our living room rug, my fathers victory was complete, she would never leave him again.
This was our house. It was somewhere Mum knew so well, somewhere she had been so proud of, a home to her as wife and mother. For now, her children were elsewhere and we were all that mattered to Mum. She had given up so much to raise us and had sacrificed so much trying to make her marriage work. All she had strived for was now in tatters; her home now little more than a murder scene and she herself was the victim. Now she lay on a rug she had chosen, staring lifeless at the ceiling as her home filled with police officers.