Chris Thrall - State of Mind: How I Ran 36 Ultramarathons Back to Back with No Training (Eating Smoke Series)

A journey of athousand miles is best undertaken in running shoes.

Daisy Duke

he eerie black rock loomed out of the fog like something from aSpielberg film. My lungs heaved, heart pounded, sweat poured. A lifelong senseof failure fused with the exhaustion and pain to suffocate me in self-doubt.

What the hell am I doing?

As I shuffled along the abandoned World War II airfieldin the dark, the idea of me joining an elite military unit crushed down on the skinnyshoulders of my 130-pound frame. Upon spotting Helmstone Rock, a local landmarkand the halfway point on this excruciating one-mile jog, I sensed my feeble spiritcrash onto the potholed tarmac.

How can it still be that far? asked myexhausted inner child. Why dont I just stop and end the suffering?

My pace slowed to almost a standstill

The demons closed in

How the insecure teenage me opted to act at thisjuncture would change the course of my life. At forty-eight-years old I would run999 miles virtually nonstop, carrying a heavy backpack and sleeping at the sideof the road. Come forty-nine I would complete a quadruple-ironman-distancetriathlon. Thirty years on Id have explored eighty countries across sevencontinents and achieved every single one of my goals. Id carry fire in myheart and peace in my mind, an enlightened individual with the power to turndarkness into light.

New Years Eve 1987 and I was unemployed and living in my car. Danwas my best mate. His father was a veteran of the Falklands Conflict, asergeant major in the Royal Marines Commandos, who on national television saidof his South Atlantic experience, I took down boys. I brought back men.

Upon leaving school Dan failed even more exams thanI did. His options limited he decided to join the ranks of this elite amphibiousassault force with its proud motto of Per Mare per Terram, By Sea byLand. Dan was determined to earn the Royal Marines coveted green beret, butbefore being offered a place on the gruelling eight-month basic trainingprogram, the longest and toughest in the world, he would first have to pass thethree-day Potential Recruit Course at the Commando Training Centre in Devon.

The course hasnt changed much over the years. Itis essentially a full-bore introduction to Royal Marines life combined with anassessment of whether or not you fit into it. A battle-hardened training team putyou through some soft drills such as making your bed in the morning and laughingat their crap jokes and some hard ones. The latter involves a series ofagonising physical tests designed to see whether your mind gives up or yourheart does. They begin with an hour-long swim in the pool and as if this isnt challengingenough the Physical Training Instructor asks each potential recruit to fallbackwards off the high diving board. With a mere ninety seconds to change into sportskit you then undergo a savage exercise session in the gymnasium, which sees ladsspewing up, giving up or getting told their number