Ronit Plank - When She Comes Back

Praise for Ronit Plank and
When She Comes Back

"An intimate, intuitive, emotionally vivid family account
that finds hope in reconciliation."

- Kirkus Reviews

"Oh, how I loved this heartbreaking, transfixing coming of age tale! A pitch-perfect, novelistic depiction of a childhood cut short by instability and loss, When She Comes Back reminded me of Jeanette Walls' The Glass Castle . But Plank's voice is purely her own, laced with humor and underpinned by deep, hard-won wisdom and self-knowledge. I loved it
and you will, too."

- Joanna Rakoff, My Salinger Year

"This captivating memoir draws the readers into the altered reality of cult life, and what happens to those left behind. When young Ronits mother left her family for guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, whose followers were later responsible for a major US terrorist attack, she was left to navigate her own emotional growth and her concept of motherhood, without a guiding influence. The compelling, raw story will leave you thinking about Ronit long after the book is done."
- Allison K Williams, Seven Drafts: Self-Edit Like a Pro from Blank Page to Book

With great candor, Ronit Plank creates a compelling memoir, When She Comes Back , detailing the impact of her mothers choice to leave Plank and her younger sister when they were six and four, respectively, to follow a cult guru in India. Planks story is a testament to human beings lasting yearning for parental connections. When She Comes Back is a captivating, empathetic, and inspiring journey into the perspectives of understanding, forgiveness, and acceptance. A gripping read!
- Allison Hong Merrill, author of Ninety-Nine Fire Hoops, A Memoir

Artfully written, When She Comes Back is the powerful account of Ronit Planks childhood, from her earliest years of communal living within an Israeli kibbutz, to the tumultuous years in NYC while her absent mother followed Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, the guru and now infamous sex-cult leader from the Netflix documentary Wild Wild Country . In this fascinating coming-of-age memoir, Ronit Plank poignantly explores the resilience of a child longing for her mother and ultimately leads us along her path to reconciliation. When She Comes Back is a stunning debut.
- Jason Allen, Author of The East End

When She Comes Back tells the almost unbelievable story of a girl left behind by a mother who fell into the thrall of one of the most infamous cult leaders of the 20th century, following the Bhagwan Shri Rajneesh to India, then the doomed Oregon featured in the documentary Wild, Wild Country , while her two young children grew up in the company of various relatives and a father who wasnt finished growing up himself. Despite the extraordinary circumstances of her childhood, Planks story will feel relatable to anyone who has ever wondered if their family is normal, or experienced the more routine childhood trauma of divorce. Empathetic, richly detailed, and self-aware, When She Comes Back is a heartbreaking, hopeful story about loss, resilience, and growing up too soon.
- Erica C. Barnett, Author of Quitter

"A beautifully written and wrenching story of abandonment and resilience, When She Comes Back grabbed me by the heart. I could not put
this powerful memoir down."
- Aspen Matis, bestselling author of Your Blue Is Not My Blue
and Girl in the Woods

When She Comes Back

a memoir

Ronit Plank

No part of this book may be reproduced, distributed, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.

Some names in this book have been changed in order to protect peoples privacy.

Text copyright 2021 by Ronit Plank
All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, distributed, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.

Published by Motina Books, LLC, Van Alstyne, Texas
www.MotinaBooks.com

ISBN-13: 978-1-945060-18-2 (ebook)
ISBN-13: 978-1-945060-19-9 (paperback)
ISBN-13: 978-1-945060-26-7 (hardcover)

For my family, especially my husband and my children
and
For my sister, who lit the way

A soul in belief is a delicate thingit can be exploited or liberated, depending on circumstances.

-Mallika Rao Why I Hate Gurus, Vulture

When my mother told us she was going to visit Bhagwan Shree Rajneeshs ashram, I was six years old and my sister was three. She was taking us to see our father for the first time since hed left the year before but I remember the promise she made: she would be back at the end of the summer to collect Nava and me and bring us home to Seattle. I had no idea at the time that she would be absent from my life for decades to comeor that my mother was committing herself to a cult.

It was well past my bedtime when we landed at Newark Airport. I pressed my face to the window as the plane taxied and came to a stop but could only make out a few small luggage trucks pulling up to meet us in the dark.

Come on, Ronit, she said, grabbing her purse and hoisting Nava into her arms. I glanced at the adults standing in the aisle behind me and followed my mother off the plane. The sticky June air hit me as soon as I stepped on the jetway and though it was late the terminal teemed with people. I kept my eyes on my mother who walked ahead with Nava in her arms, searching for my father, her mouth tight, her face unreadable.

I, too, searched for my father among the men near the gate, though I wasnt sure I remembered exactly what he looked like and I wonder now if he felt the same. We hadnt seen each other since hed come to our rental house after their divorce a year before to say goodbye. My mother slowed to a stop and put Nava down. My father stood just ahead, mustached and big-haired, wearing the same thick glasses hed had for years, and a long-sleeved, collared shirt. I leaned down and told my sister, Thats Daddy.

I smiled at him like I might at a stranger, unsure if he would smile back, and suddenly, before I had time to see what his response would be, he picked me up and hugged me, swinging me around as he did. It was a change from the tentativeness between my mother and me. There had been less of her to hold onto for a while.

I focused on the geometric patterns on his shirt, the pack of Winston Lights in the pocket, his familiar smell. Before I was ready for him to let me go, he put me down and picked up my sister.

My parents stood facing each other, together in a way they hadnt been in so long, but I didnt feel any surge of relief, saw no sign they loved each other again. So, I smiled because I knew I should feel happy, though I didnt. I thought maybe my mother would feel better when she saw my father, but something was wrong.

People in the airport moved in all directions, I heard unfamiliar languages and accents, smelled leather and perfume and hairspray. The excitement of travel pulsed and swelled all around us, but I homed in on the silence swirling between my parents directly above me. I had been sucked into their whirlpool, once again drawn to their center.

My father tried to make eye contact with my mother but she kept looking away. His jaw clenched. She adjusted her purse strap, flicked her hair away from her eyes.

I didnt have the details, and at age six couldnt have truly understood even if I had, but I felt the dissonance: two people who had given me life no longer wanted anything to do with each other. Yet there I was, a reminder of their connection, and of their mistakes. Someone they had no choice but to take care of.

My mother bent down toward me. I have to catch my plane.