Noel Holston - Life After Deaf: My Misadventures in Hearing Loss and Recovery

Copyright 2019 by Noel Holston

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available on file.

Cover design by Paul Qualcom

Cover image credit: Getty Images

Print ISBN: 978-1-5107-4687-9

Ebook ISBN: 978-1-5107-4688-6

Printed in the United States of America

For Marty, my spark

Table of Contents

Authors Note

This is a book about how going deaf changed my life, my identity, my marriage, my relationship with the world. Its a chronicle of what Ive done to cope, what Ive learned about hearing loss and communication, and what it might be like for you or someone in your life. An estimated 40 million American are deaf or hearing impaired. Our numbers grow every day.

and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

John Donne

Bell? What bell?

Noel Holston

Introduction

Usually, the purpose of an introduction is to do precisely that: introduce the reader to a books subject, tone, and author, as a place setter for what is to follow. But already, before arriving to this point, the reader has been handed significant hints from the author himself.

The books very title, Life After Deaf, is a giveaway tell that Noel Holston not only is not above the occasional puns, but revels and wallows in wordplay. The authors note, placed before these pages, clearly establishes the books approach to the subject of being hearing impaired, a focus at once contextually wide and personally specific. By telling his own story so honestly, Noel manages to shed light on scores of millions of others. And the third piece of evidence supplied by the author in the pages before this intro, the overleaf, is the capper: He betrays his love of literature and popular culture by quoting John Donne, then follows it with his own unexpected, wry rejoinder. As I read the galleys for this book, that hilarious one-two punch truly made me laugh out loudand the book itself hadnt even started yet. Those early clues, taken together, are ample early evidence of what you can expect to experience throughout Life After Deaf : an uncommon combination of incisive intelligence and playful humor.

Long before Noel Holston finally decided to write his memoir and become an author, he toiled, as I did and still do, in the field of TV criticism. As such, he was one of the very best writers on the beat, and also one of the best reporters and analysts. Those are three distinctly different skills, and all three are the secret weapons he employs when turning his focus inward. Because of his background as a reporter, Noel does the necessary research to know what hes talking about, asks all the right questions, and pays attention to the actions and reactions of those around him. Hes honest enough to describe what hes feeling, and hearing or not hearing, every step of the way, so he takes you with him from start to finish. And hes such a good writer that hes always making references and observations that help ground his story and make it relatable, while trusting that, especially in writing a memoir, honesty is the best policy. As a result, Life After Deaf is a bravely unfiltered and wide-ranging voyage, with Noel as a charming tour guidetaking you not only deep inside his ear canal, but deep inside his marriage and his mind, as well.

By telling his own story so personally, and so personably, Noel has written something here that is more than just informative or inspirationalthough its both of those, big-time. Life After Deaf , as I read it, also is a love letter. He doesnt omit or neglect the feelings of his wife and family and freely acknowledges that, as with anyone suffering through any malady or tragedy, those burdens are seldom carried alone. By including those around him in his story, even when observing how much his behavior is irritating them, the tale hes telling is more relatable, more empathetic, and ultimately more real.

This book can be read as a primer: what to expect, and perhaps what to avoid, when noticing that your auditory senses are beginning to wane significantly. And as a memoir, telling the story of a writer who finds ways to adapt as both his journalistic career and his hearing skills shift through the years. But please dont underestimate the power of Noels storytelling, and his love of music and pop culture, laced through every page of this narrative. Its what ultimately makes this very serious memoir so funny and joyful. References come from all over and pop up at unexpected times, yet always stick their landings, whether hes comparing a cockeyed mechanics of the human ear to a Rube Goldberg contraption or making apt references to the Marvel comic superhero Daredevil or David Sevilles novelty hit Witch Doctor. And Im sorrybut when a retirement-age white man with hearing problems refers to himself as Mos Deaf, he deserves, if not demands, to be heard.

And hearing, after all, is at the center of Noels story. Turn the page and experience it for yourself

David Bianculli, Fresh Air TV Critic
and Rowan University professor of TV Studies

Chapter 1

Monkey Business

O ur bedroom was chilly when I slid out of bed and stumbled into the bathroom to relieve myself. It was the beginning of my winter daybreak ritual: Get up. Relieve. Wash hands. Clomp downstairs. Turn up thermostat. Turn on coffee maker. Feed cats.

But as I stood over the toilet in the nightlights blue glow, I heard no splash. Hmm, I murmured to myself.

The hmm was inaudible, too. I stepped over to the sink and turned the handle. The water I saw rushing from the faucet was a silent stream. Hmm, I murmured again.

I surveyed my face in the medicine cabinet mirror. I watched my left hand as I reached up and rubbed my left ear. The sound it made was faint, distant, and dull as cotton. I rubbed my right ear with my right hand. Nothing. Nothing at all.

I shuffled back to bed and lay down next to my wife, eyes fixed on the ceiling. I woke Marty, not meaning to, with what I would have sworn was whispering. I was mouthing wordsnames, numbers, snippets of songshoping to find a tone, a pitch, that would register as sound. She told me later that her first sleepy thought when my mumbling woke her was that I had suffered a stroke.

Honey, whats wrong? she asked. Her face loomed over me like a pale moon. I responded to her worried look, not her words.

Your lips are moving, I said, but theres no sound.

Nothing? she said.

I shook my head.

She came around to my side of the bed and switched on the brass lamp on my nightstand. She motioned for me to sit up and then pushed a folded pillow behind me. Marty is medically knowledgeable. One of the many day jobs shes worked in her life as a singer, songwriter, and musician is certified nurses attendant. She wanted to look me over and assess whether we needed to race to the nearest emergency room.